Hi,I'm bonoboy and here is a joke...LOL

Hello everybody, my name is bonoboy as the name next to my avatar would probably suugest...I didn't notice anywhere in particular that you could tell a joke or two so I take artistic license on this and start here If I may...

So it's the 70's, in the disco era, you know? And this guy with a big attitude (and a big afro) walks into a diner. he goes up to the waiter, and says:

"You know what? I'm hungry. Get me a hamburger. But not too juicy. not too dry, but right in the groove."

"Would you like a drink with that sir???"

"Yes, as a matter of fact, get me a milkshake. Not too thick, not too thin, but right in the groove!"

"How 'bout fries."

"Sure, why not. but not too soggy, not too crispy, but right in the groove!"

So the waiter is getting pretty pissed now, so he goes to talk with the chef, and comes back to the afroman a minute later.

Well, the chef said... that you can kiss his ass. But not to the left, not to the right. BUT RIGHT IN THE GROOVE!!!"

 

And if you want to smile type the words "miserable failure" into google and click on I'm feeling lucky...LOL

 

LOL funny stuff

 

What did the 0 say to the 8 ?











Nice belt!...LOL

 

Well, hello bonoboy

 

Hmm. Hi.

 

Hey!!!...don't I know you from somwhere...?...You're handwriting is suspiciously familiar....

 

Hi Kardea...Damn this is confusing, 'cos your handwriting looks familiar also...I'm new here by the way, and I'm as daft as a brush...Allegedly...Cheers!

 

Hey Bono,welcome to the forums....I would tell you a joke,but I can't think of any at the moment

 

Hello wondergirl, nevermind about the joke, it's the thought that count's ...I'll see if I can think of one...BRB

 

Okay,I'm waiting to laugh lol...

 

welcome..
who let the weirdos in//

heehee

 

So, there's this bus full of 50 ugly people driving down a meandering mountain road. Suddenly, the bus careers out of control, and falls off a cliff, killing everyone on board instantly. Soon after, these 50 ugly people are standing at the gates of heaven, and St. Peter is feeling mighty sorry for these poor souls. So, he says "Since you have all been cursed with unbelievable bad luck, I will grant you each one wish to make your stay in heaven more enjoyable." The first ugly person thinks about this for a bit, and he says "I want to be beautiful again!" The second person agrees, and says "Me too!" So, every single ugly person starts asking for the same wish. By the time they get to the last ugly person, he's rolling on the ground in a fit of laughter. St. Peter waits for the man to compose himself, and then asks, "What is your wish, good sir?" The guy wipes the tears off his eyes, and says "Make 'em all ugly again!!"
__________________

 

A Really Bad Day
There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.

Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."

"No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away."

"I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."

 

lol

 

Those are funny lol....okay I found this one on my PC,I saved it because I thought it was hilarious,but I have a weird sense of humor

A farmer has about 500 hens, but no rooster, and he wants chicks.
So, he goes down the road to the next farmer and asks if he has a rooster
for sale.

The other farmer says, "Yep, I've got this great rooster named Kenny, he'll
service every chicken you got, no problem." Kenny cost $3,000 but the
farmer decides he'd be worth it.

So, he buys Kenny and takes him home and sets him down in the barnyard, and
gives him a pep talk.

"I want you to pace yourself now. You've got a lot of chickens to service
here, and you cost me a lot of money. So I'll need you to do a good job.
Take your time and have some fun," the farmer said, with a chuckle. He
points toward the hen house and Kenny takes off like a shot. WHAM!
Kenny gets every hen in the hen house three or four times, and the
farmer is shocked. After that, he hears a commotion in the duck pen and, sure enough, Kenny is in there. Later, the farmer sees Kenny after a flock of geese down by the lake. Again-WHAM! He gets all the geese.

By sunset he sees Kenny out in the fields chasing quail and pheasants. The
farmer is distraught and worried that his expensive rooster won't last 24
hours.

Sure enough, the farmer goes to bed and wakes up the next morning to find
Kenny on his back out in the middle of the yard, mouth open, tongue hanging
out and both feet sticking straight up in the air. Buzzards are circling overhead.

The farmer, saddened by the loss of such a colourful and expensive animal,
shakes his head and says, "Oh, Kenny, I told you to pace yourself. I tried
to get you to slow down, now look what you've done to yourself."

Kenny opens one eye, nods toward the buzzards circling overhead and says,
"Shhhh. They're getting closer!"

 

LMFAO@ That one...

 

An old man and woman were married for many years, even though they hated each other. When they had a confrontation, screaming and yelling could be heard deep into the night.
The old woman would shout, "When I die, I will dig my way up and out of the grave and come back and haunt you for the rest of your life!"
Neighbors feared her They believed she practiced blackmagic because of the many strange occurrences that took place in their neighborhood.
The old woman liked the fact that she was feared. To everyone's relief, she died of a heart attack when she was 68.
He had a closed casket at the wake. After the burial, he went straight to the local bar and began to party as if there was no tomorrow.
His neighbors, concerned for his safety, asked,
"Aren't you afraid that she may indeed be able to dig her way up and out of the grave and come back to haunt you for the rest of your life?"
The Man put down his drink and said, "Let her dig."

"I had her buried upside down......."

 

lol...that's a good one,too

 

I like U2...When I first joined a forum...I never had a name prepared so I just entered the first name that came to my head...I got stuck with it ever since I'm afraid...