boogans - I Have Eyes No way to know, no way to tell Is this bliss? Or is it just hell I’m going under, I’m seeing red It’s like I need Eyes in the back of my head But they don’t start working till I’m almost dead I guess I’m alive, because the feeling’s still there But how the fuck do I try to care? Don’t tell me when to speak, how to think, how to smoke, when to drink It’s all just water going down the sink Through the pipes, down into the sea Swimming free where it wants to be ------ Up and over the valley of time ------ Fix the foul taste with a lime ------ Take a deep, deep breath and open your mind ------ Please find a way out of the daily grind ------ The clock ticks on and doesn’t lie ------ As I lay me down and watch the sky ------ Open up, and look inside because ------ I have eyes Look into an alternate world Of frosted buds and sticky herb In this life, my voice is heard To good to be true? No baby, it’s the pearl Look into an alternate world Of big fat buds and dank dank herb In this life, your voice is heard Can you say that about your schwag suburbs? Look into an alternate world Of green leafy buds and little purple herb In this life, we are all heard It’s not all bad, you can rest assured I just wrote this. Thoughts?
i'm not gonna lie, that's not too bad at all man. watch out for your cliches though. go through that piece and look at how many lines are using cliches... it's well done, just be aware of that. got music for it?
Sporadic. All across the board. Some neat lines and phrases, but ultimately lacking a cohesive thought behind it.
