I have no self confidence at all

I'm a 18 year old male and struggle with my self confidence. I'm not a virgin but haven't had sex in two years. First of all, I'm not very confident about my looks. I'm skinny, short (5'7), and look somewhat younger than my age. I wouldn't consider myself ugly but definitely more towards average looking. The most common compliment I've received from the opposite sex is that I'm "cute" but I could never really picture a girl being all that impressed by me at first glance. Second of all, I don't really know how to flirt with women. It's not that I'm scared to talk to girls or anything like that it's just that I'm usually friend zoned. I really have no clue how to talk to a girl where she would want to have sex with me. I'm funny, but not in a flirtatious way if that makes sense? I guess I also don't really fit what women would consider "manly" either. I'm really laid back and I don’t have a bold, confident, fearless, competitive or aggressive bone in my body.

It also doesn't help having a hot ass best friend who is cool as fuck and knowing she'd want to date me or at least have sex with me if I was more her type. I know she's at least somewhat attracted to me, and I've seen her fuck uglier guys (probably because they're confident) but again I have no idea how to talk to women in that way. Also I guess it's a different situation altogether because she's my best friend.

I've had issues with this for a long time and would really appreciate some advice on how to improve my self confidence. It honestly makes me depressed sometimes.

 

Hmm, well in life, i think this goes for everyone in it..

I got 3 words for you.

Quitters never win.

Who gives a damn about some other dudes. You got your own standards and hopefully morals, then go get what you want.

Listen

"every fucking thing we do in life we do it our way, from making major money flowin to kickin off manaje, bitches see your success and throw that pussy your way, get them wet and hotter than a summer in zimbabwe"

 

People want to tell you how to live your life. Don't listen to them. It is all bullshit. Be yourself.

Do stuff that you like. If it gives you pleasure, nothing else is important.

They want to tell you that you are ugly, that you are stupid, that you aren't cool. Then you go to work, make money and spend them on becoming 'beautifull' 'smart' and 'cool'.

Just don't listen to that. Be yourself. Accept yourself. Fuck what others think about you. Seriously. Stop caring about that.

Go make something not in your style. Yell 'I hate you motherfuckers!' in crowd and run away.

 

Me neither

 

What are you good at? What do you like to do? Do you know any women that enjoy the same activities? There is a start for you. Something in common to get things going. You said you are skinny. Find a gym, or if you're uncomfortable doing that, buy yourself a set of weights and start working on that body until you are. I've met quite a few women at the gym. I'm 45 and I still get plenty of women young and old checking me out. There's some chick out there dying to meet you, you just haven't met her yet.

 

just be yourself kid and don't let he bad guys get ta ya.cos its never about who you are,only always about their own lack of self esteem and confidence in themselves.sadly sometimes the only way people feel they can lift themselves up, is by putting someone else down. as matter a fact the next it happens take it as a compliment,cos you must be doing a lota things right when assholes! don't like you.stay you kid.be happy:2thumbsup:

 

Love is much more fulfilling than sex. If someone loves you, they don't care what you look like. When you get to know a girl, get to know her for who she is, not how she looks.

 

Don't try so hard, just be yourself Dude.

 

Go to bars, try to talk to girls. Try talking to them in supermarkets, or while walking outside. Basically just work on your "talk to girl" skills. Start off by just smiling at girls you see. Build up from there. It just takes time and the effort or acting against the resistances of self doubt and fear.

 

Start lifting, that's all it takes for girls to look at you twice. At first glance they might look at your pecs, or your biceps. Who cares man, at your age all girls don't know what they want. Golden years of getting into relationships with no real limits on what happens in the future. Enjoy it, be the most alpha male you can be. Who gives a fuck if some of them friendzone you, get ripped and watch as they swarm over you like flies.

It's superficial but seriously at your age that's all you will get, superficial bullshit

 

But you haven't actually seen her fuck these ugly guys, have you? She sounds like a slut. I'd let her know my feelings towards her, if I were you. You'll only rise in her opinion if she doesn't think u're gay. She might be a bit shocked at first. Why be ashamed of the truth. She'll probably fuck u sooner or later if 1)she's a slut and 2)she's your friend.

 

Don't think to much about what to talk about, that's missing the point. Get into the person, not the conversation - stuff to talk about will just come naturally and you'll find yourself just falling into a flirt, just roll with it after that.

 

Just about every 18 year old has confidence problems. Even those that on that outside look like they don't. When I was that age, the thing that helped me most was to have goals, and to be challenging myself. This was usually by attending college, or traveling. As I had successes, I felt better about myself. Being physical is good too. Having outlets where you push your body, or try to become better at a sport, add a lot of confidence.

As for your crush on your best friend. That's tough. If you want to test the reality a bit, you may want to compliment her and see how she reacts. A big part of being flirtatious is concentrating on how you can make the other person feel good.

 

The first step to self confidence is not giving a flying fuck wether you are confident or not or what others think about that.

You are you. Every motherfucker in the room better accept that! :sunny: