I keep accidentally "acting single" - Advice thread

There is some truth to this. Though I don't like to flirt and haven't considered any of my behavior with the dudes I refer to as even remotely flirtatious

Still I'm sure I subconsciously avoid reiterating my unavailable status a bit because I do want to continue to have someone to talk to. There's also the point of when to interject it into a conversation that has nothing to do with my bf or relationship status. I will say things like "my boyfriend loves that movie" or whatever fits in the conversation

As to pushing the boundaries in my relationship. No, I'm quite certain it's not. Maybe I should feel guilty for *wanting* to push them to their absolute limits, but that has absolutely nothing to do with what happened here

Tonight for instance, I had a really nice time talking with a guy that's super cool, sexy, and has a hot girlfriend. It was SO COMFORTABLE. I knew for certain that he was not chasing my tail he was just talking to me.

 

Generally speaking, I think single people and people who are tied-down, or even people who want to be tied-down, should keep to their own.

I don`t think mixing up works very much. I certainly can`t stand being around couples for long. Or, even, guys who want a girlfriend. It`s a pain in the ass hanging out with them!

But, to be honest, hanging out with players trying to pick up chicks has also outlived its utility for me. I get along with people who are single and not-looking.

And, those are the people whose company I seek. And, there are like, two of us on the whole Earth! :biggrin:

 

Nice to meet u

 

Yeah, and I forgot to say that the other single and not-looking person on this Earth does not like me or want to have sex with me!

 

Damn, to think i was this close to making a solid friendship

 

I know what "solid" means. Don`t try it.

 

hah, funny cuz right when i posted that i started wondering if "solid" was the word i was looking for, considering english isn't my native language and i just literally translated the french word "solide".
Anyway, i get it, i'm transparent =P

 

since most people who frequent bars are there to 'hook up"

it's an easy mistake to make

believing that a girl - whether she claims to have a boyfriend or not

might be looking for a bit of attention.

i believe that once you're in a relationship

you should never stop going out and enjoying yourself

but you should be aware of the fact that the paradigm has changed

you're not available - so you need to be more constrained.

remember

even if it's not for your own sake

or your boyfriend or girlfriends

it might be for the poor bastard that you could be talking to.

 

The condition for me to be an asexual teddy bear friend of yours is that you hook me up with your hot friends. Fair, isn`t it?

 

when i went to a lot of bars, it was for the purpose of getting drunk. now when i occasionally make it to the bar, it's because greasy bar food is better than hooking up.

but yeah, there are a lot who go out for that reason too. and i wouldn't turn down a decent looking drunk girl if she was impressed by the hot sauce all over my face and decided to make a move.

 

I've exchanged a hot sauce kiss before, it was tingly and awesome. I love hot sauce.

 

Sure, although introducing u to my hot friends should be enough, u go ahead and seduce them. *bro fist*

 

If a woman went onto a dating site and then complained that the guys she communicated with thought that she was single, people would think that the woman was being silly.

Apparently the OP doesn't recognize the similarities between a bar and a dating site.

 

Fair enough. And, on my word, I will be going to Paris by the end of this year. My father is moving there, and I am acquiring EU citizenship. I will go visit him, and then travel through northern Europe with two gay friends of mine from New York.

You`ll have the opportunity to honor our agreement. It would also be nice to meet someone there who speaks English. How does that sound?

Edit: BTW, as soon as you go monogamous on me, all bets are off, correct? It`s one thing to hang out with you without being able to touch you, quite another thing to be the third wheel on your dates, and listen to how great your boyfriend was in bed that morning.

BTW2, monogamous friends don`t count either.

 

It was different though cause I wasn't just talking to this guy because there was no one else to talk to.

I was completely drawn to him like a kindred spirit.

I didn't mean to avoid the b word, but sure enough he asked me if he could get my number before I managed to make that point

I went from relaxed and comfortable to awkward and reserved in no time flat

...Lame

 

Yeah...

You're problem is not that you are accidentally acting single; you don't know how to act taken, and most likely have no sincere, deep interest in doing so.

I think you like this, until it gets to that ending awkward point.

 

^ yeah well I am in a new environment and I'm not used to going out by myself

In this case I did like it until the awkward part cause this guy feels like my people, like family

I just really suck at dealing with the idea that men find me attractive or think I'm attracted to them

It has been a non-issue most of my life. I'm just drawing it to myself lately

 

I got this all figured out

I'm afraid of my sexuality because

I'm afraid that if I rock my ass somebody's gonna think I want to bounce it off their ballsack

That's why it gets to me

I discovered this tonight when I was talking about how I love to dance with my friend's dad because I can just relax


And this dude that is one of the hottest musicians with the slamminist girl in town had the slightest little tender tone and I totally clammed up

Like I :know for certain: this dude has no interest in my tail and he scares me just because *I* think *He* is sexy

Sexual repression or frustration aside, the most spectacular freedom I get is a good dance which I got tonight

 

Just an add in leu of edit

It amazes that girl with rockin bodies can party in mini dresses while I'm out in my jammies afraid of being appealing or wanting to be appealing

It's like the *opposite* of some girls

What I really want is to be as sexy as I want to be without being afraid of it

Turning heads is not cheating

The root problem in this whole issue is that it IS a problem at all

 

JAMMIES ARE SEXY.

i don't understand why girls can't comprehend this.