My emotions are really messed up. When bad stuff happens to me or I get in trouble or something sometimes I feel happy and don't really care about it, other times when I'm with friends and everyone's having a good time I suddenly get really depressing thoughts and almost break down into tears. Earlier today I was with some friends and I couldn't get into a good mood no matter what, we were standing by a river and I was just watching the current flow and I started having really deep thoughts about life and stuff and just felt like jumping it and drowning. I've been like this for a while. It doesn't happen all the time just every so often. It's really hard to explain..
Maybe the root of the problem isn't emotional but in your thinking. There's nothing wrong with feeling sad whenever you do or sitting by the river thinking heavy thoughts that make you feel like you want to jump in. Don't fight it. I spoke to a man Down at the tracks. I asked him How he don't go mad. He said "Look here junior, don't you be so happy. And for Heaven's sake, don't you be so sad." - Tom Verlaine, "Marquee Moon"
