I wrote these things.

Here are some words I've put together, some are very very old, others not that much. I will be posting more as I write more :tongue:

Welcome Back - 04/10/07

The fogginess is gone and my mind is once again clear.
It feels like it never was anything but this,
The confusion is an old picture from someone else.
I hold it in my hand and it fades.
It carries stories, but those are not mine to tell.
I decide to sit quiet, stretch a little while I take another breath.
A good silence it is.
I enjoy it as much as I appreciate the air.
It’s good to be back.
Did I wake up from a long dream?
Or should I call it nightmare?
Has it ever been that extraordinaire?
I just remembered what I always knew,
It feels recent but not new.
A quiet silence full of melodies;
It doesn’t seem to be disturbed by the noise from outsiders.
There's a new song and it always comes along.
It makes of my smile the consequence of happiness.
I leave the earth one more time
This time, my feet don’t leave the ground;
All is where it needs to be.

 

Everything fades- 03/26/07

He held my hand and we went for a fly.
Pink skies,
Sunny eyes,
Happy feelings inside.
There was no need to wave from up high.
I forgot the world,
he was mine.
In the hopes to go higher, too much excitement made me crash down.
A concrete floor I found.
No, he was nowhere around.
With his eyes closed I had to scream loud
"Down here, I no longer have wings".
Yeah, he came to my encounter, but.
Could I love him now that he is not longer my cloud?
I can try, I can try.
I love to try but should I try to love,
You tell me... should I?

 

Happy. Sad - 01/25/07

I miss my sunny afternoons, that go slow and the easy ones that are spent fast. I miss sitting down for hours exchanging ideas, maybe silently.
desire seems to be escaping more and more from me. I understand, I haven't forgotten the words that slipped from a stranger's mouth (my favorite kind) "Desire is a big part of life". Yes, I still understand it but I still lack it. Can you learn to desire? Or does it just comes to you and invades you?
feel it... feel it. I dont feel it.
Let me think of my lack of ambition as a quirky trait, it works for me.
Dont you see the depth in my eyes? Dont you hear the conviction in my voice when I say I just want to live... life. That could always be a lie.
I just want to spend my days, next to a body, thinking of songs. Fool myself thinking that his, hers, everybody's desire is the one I'm looking for,
that is mine, but I'm not that dumb, soon enough I'm bored looking for warmth in a new place; I dont have sunlight anymore, only nights and all they imply. So I'll disguise myself as the one I once was, imagine happiness
and dream of escape. It's such a sweet word.
Let me waste time, isn't that what I'm doing now ?
Desire, I think I have some of that. Is just not for your kind of life.

 

An untitled night - 01/18/07

I stole one of your cigs,
lighted it up and started to enjoy it
Slowly.
I was sitting in front of you, in silence.
Sumerged in my thoughts.
I wouldn't acknowledge your presence, it was nothing.
I tried to forget, I tried to forget, I try to forget.
Everytime in vain.
Where does this feeling comes from?
and the answer is to long to tell
Beautiful oblivion,
lost in a daze
You remember me of me
I dont know if I should smile or not.
I smile.
There's not much else I can do now.
Silently I consume my hours next to you.
A moving pause into whatever's next.
I live my moments thinking I'm somewhere else.
It makes them enjoyable,
when you tell me the story of yesterday,
I dont know the girl who you speak of, but we have the same name.
"Come here" you say and I go, not sure if Im following my role.
I dont know why we pretend to be so much
I let myself contaminate my lips with use.
Then I let you escape.

 

Close encounter from the first kind - 07/12/06

It was new, polished, it shined.
A thin transparent veil covered it,
protecting it.
Inside, it lived.
In my hands, it beat.
I took the cover out.
Slowly,
with delicacy.
Careful I was,
anxious too.
Outside: no longer an unknown thing.
It grew,
quickly,
taking over me.
My arms were wrapped around it.
In its shadow,
I waited.
Me: an ant under a tree.
I looked up in awe.
Static,
ignorant.
It took me with it,
Willingly?
A journey.
I saw so much,
too much.
Brown skies full of green.
Just like water we went,
without taking a step.
Air: our guide.
There where no roles assigned.
I died in its arms,
I was reborn in its heart
New, Polished, I shined.

 

Daydreamer - 06/29/06

He takes my hand with his words,
it feels warm and soft.
I'm no longer attached to the ground.
The wind and us,
is us the wind.
My smile becomes eternal.
Our fingers are intertwined in the most free of knots.
He doesn't let go of my hand,
of my heart.
The rush keeps building up;
higher we go.
The inside drum keeps beating louder,
faster
I see it.
We are getting close.
The brightest of stars,
The one that stands alone
he lets go.
I crash
Still in my chair,
I am
Stardust covers my eyes.

 

Listening to Grace - 02/05/06

The condesated air escapes my lungs, I can see it in front of me.
"Hold it in" she says, for what? I wonder without saying a word.
I keep taking quick steps facing the blur.
"Have to keep moving" I repeat to myself.
So I go faster, even when I should stop.
Leaving her behind with a gray look in her eyes.
She doesn't follow me around,
I dont expect her to, not anymore. It's already time.
The gap between us keeps growing, until it's just nothing.
Nothing to look back for, not a piece to miss.
A different puzzle for me to not share.
I dont look around anymore, too much of looking at the sides,
I'll rather close my eyes, for a little while.
A soundtrack of thoughts goes with me along the way,
reminding me of the changing scenery.
I feel different in this new atmosphere.
So new, but it seems that this feelings belong to me.
Learning from random conversations unrelated to the lesson,
but I keep learning.
My pupils grow wide as they take what they see.
Wanting so many things.
The blissful sounds take me elsewhere, not where I meant to go.
I pass by her again, she's just standing there.
I dont bother to say hello.
An old reflection of me that is lost.
I stopped looking at the faces of strangers to look at my own.
I got a new mirror, is everywhere I go.

 

-A girl I know - 06/30/05

Rainy days, they dont make me want to stay.
I want to go outside,
watch how every single drop travels from the sky to the floor.
All day I have been here and there, with this and that.
Laying in the back of a car seat, listening to the crappy songs on the radio.
Peaceful state, drifting away in a wave,
I laugh because I want to laugh,
then I breathe because I need to breathe.
All the time, things visit my head, creating pictures, creating sounds.
I see your smile, I hear your voice... so I call.
It's nice to feel you in the other side of the line,
wish you were there with us, on the other side of the car.
Later will be our time...
to have a little fun, share some laughs, some words and some heart.
I like the way your hair falls on your face creating inviting ways,
I like the way your eyes gaze at the world, full of wonder,
I like the way your lips open to let some words escape your mouth,

Watching you there,having a good time,
just being, sharing.
So happy
I cant stop talking, you cant stop laughing.
Looking for the right moments.
looking for solitude,
so we danced down the stairs, where it's quiet and dark.

Things started with kisses.
I like the way you left me, wanting for more.

 

-Moon tripping -05/01/05

Last night the moon came down
We could see it reflect its light in the sea
Only inches apart from the dark blue mass
Slowly it start to rise again
Slowly reaching its place
It returned up in the sky
and was silver once again
Now that image only remains in our heads.​

 

Nights Away - 02/05/06

The pounding pain in my head, reminds me of the ticking clock.
Unable to stand.
I've gotten used to being down.
"Tomorrow", a voice on the background says, but is enough with today.
I can't handle the overweight.
Unable to stand, the floor and I.
Today is like I never knew how to float.
I never knew
Today I forgot how to pretend.
Still trying to sepparate myself, but we remain as one;
just me and today
more and more,
no desire for more
I keep getting more.
I cant help myself, attached to the ground I stay,
There's no way of not being in, today.

 

-Believe not - 10/10/05

It's all make believe.
Keep repeating the voices in my head,
they are starting to convince me.
Awakening to the dream, falling deep into it.
It's all make believe
Back and forth I go,
Back and forth..
I am what I am, I do what I do.
Its so hard to get the message through
It's so simple and clear, but always missunderstood.
It's all make believe
Lately I just dont know.
I turn down things with a smile, it's the only way I know how.
I enjoy how colours mess up with my head.
Go empty you pockets,
I'll see you when you return.
It's all make believe
It's all make believe

 

This is just lovely,It's a little bit like what I'm feeling right now.
espacially when you say;"It's good to be back''.
A really lovely text. keep writting.

 

I think u should.
Don't make my mistake, love is so woundeful as people say, and I beleive that it always worth to try.

 

I would not advice you to stop, really, have hope in yourself, you have a beautiful soul, and I think that u should keep trying, keep looking for happiness for beautiful things around you, sometimes u dont even have to look for happiness, all u have to do is to open your eyes and you will see that eveything u needed is there.

 

autentique you have written very beautiful things,I sure cannot read them all at once but Ill come back to them later, they are really beautiful, so keep up.
peace.

 

I know love is wonderful
but only when is real, that wasnt.

 

Thanks about the beautiful soul.
Im happy
It wasnt really about losing hope in myself, is about wanting nothing or close to anything and how that kinda clashes with what everybody else seems to want.

 

I haven't got the time to read all of these now and I promose to come back and read them all. From the ones I have read, most touched me in one way or another. You write beautifully and positively. My favourite so far has got to be...

This is wonderful. Beautiful. Intertwined in the most free of knots is a great way to describe a perfect relationship. I really like just about everything in this poem and the last line is so cute.

Please keep writing and posting.
Peace,
A.

 

Thanks
I think that's one of my favorites too.
I like that you say that I write positively, that always makes me smile.

 

-Time for swimming - 09/25/07

Silly girl,
always aware.
He doesnt have time,
for me and my dreams.
Only on my river they float.
I swim along
koi fish,
shiny silver.
Dancing with the current,
He doesnt like the symphony.
Now I know what the singer meant.
The sea waits,
far, far away.
I'll get there someday,
always
at the right time.
I'll remember,
it will all be clear.
I'll remember