Indications of Charachter (trip report)

so i havn't really had any trips that have been worth writing up for the last 6 months or so, but i think it's finally time -- i was really beginning to become disapointed with lsd for a while there. i guess that what i was failing to realise is that the availability and quality of experience of lsd is in large part governed by higher forces, and that paying homage to and respecting those forces is extremely important. i have always known this, but i guess i lost faith in that somewhat due to the massive availability of lsd this past summer. so i began treating it as less of a sacrament that it is. i failed to realise that the reason why it was so readily available to me was because i was in the right place, not because lsd is just a drug that is or should be as easy to acquire and experience as things like pot. as with most things in life, if your mind isn't in the right place, it just isn't going to work out the way it is supposed to.

so i dosed 1 hit by myself while with a few of my best friends. i wasn't expecting a strong trip, nor was i looking for one. i had things to do the next day, and i didn't want to have a trip that was going to interfere with my responsibilities. the doses that i had gotten from this source before were less than stellar, so the main objective was to determine the strength of all the doses i had just bought. but i was still looking for insight into the things that had been occuring in my life prior to the trip -- there had been a whole lot of stuff happening that i just wasn't happy with and had absolutely no idea how to resolve. i wanted to tackle things head on, with a little help from my friend lucy.

we all sat around deciding what we were going to do for the night while i began to come up. originally we were going to have a few people over and party at my friend's place, but then we received word that someone else was having a party that night. all of my friends really wanted to go, and i agreed since i didn't want to be holding everyone back -- although the last thing i wanted to do while i was tripping was go to a big party with a bunch of drunk people. this is where things left my control, and fate took over.

i really began tripping in the car ride there. amazing music emanated from the speakers, and i was surrounded by the people i love. there was amazing energy in the air. good vibes all around. i kept laughing hysterically at the incredible depth of the simplistic car ride. my friends then in turn began laughing at me for laughing at nothing. then i laughed at my friends for not being able to understand why i was laughing -- a vicious cycle that ended in everyone forgetting why we were laughing in the first place. hilarity. it was around this time i began to realise, or remember, the incredible unity of life. for all of the issues that we cause ourselves, is merely based on misunderstanding. i rememberd how the true nature of reality is all-powerful, and to stray from this is only an illusion. i watched as everyone was perplexed at my actions, and how in misunderstanding they traveled onto self-destructive wavelengths.

once we arrived we were pleasently surprised by good company. everyone began doing their own thing, and i sat down for a minute to analyze the situation and gain a bearing on what was going on -- i was a little anxious being around all these people that i had never tripped around before. then a random person came up and told me i stole his seat. i apologised and offered it back, but he refused. a few minutes later he came back up and introduced himself. he asked me about myself, and what i wanted to do with my life, my dreams. i told him i wanted to study philosophy, and deeper understanding -- and so he asked me about philosophy and deeper understanding. he told me to tell him something. i spouted off the first thing that came to mind, and the ideas just kept flowing. i was amazed by the fact that not only was he really listening to me, but he was also completely understanding what i was saying. i watched as the words flowed from my essence and resonated deep within his soul. before long there was a small group of people sitting there listening to what i had to say. i was amazing and enthused. i was really able to share myself, and all of the people were actually interested in what i had to say! this was incredible. THIS was what i wanted to do with my life. i wanted to be able to share deeper understanding -- and it was really happening, in the present moment. i can't explain the rush, the love, the belonging, i felt.

this trip had a very consequential overtone due to the responsibilities i had to fulfill the next day, and the fact that this guy i had never even met before came up to me asking about my life intentions blew my freakin mind. lol. throughout the night that same guy kept on coming back and asking me for more advice, all of which he completely took to heart. his and my energies collided, and we took things to a higher level. fate, in its prime.

one of my friends that i came with had been wanting to get high with me almost since we got there, but i kept telling her to hold off since i needed to stabilise my energy in this crazy enviroment before i did something like smoke pot. eventually we headed out back to get a little privacy and toked up. the weed really set off the lsd. i began tripping insanely hard -- and she was right there with me. i guess that sometimes when one person is tripping that energy can really be felt by the people who are receptive to it. we had many a funny conversation and just got completely baked. eventually we left the crazy little bubble that we had away from the rest of the party and returned to everyone else.

i was now tripping too hard to be able to converse with anyone that was not on my level, and my friend that i smoked with left shortly after that. i quickly ran and found the rest of my friends that i came with and told them the situation -- but they were totally wasted. shit! i now had to face the ever growing fact that this lsd was very strong, and that i was in this one alone. i noticed that a few of my other friends were going to go get some food. i asked if i could come with, and told them that i was on acid and needed a break from this party. i really needed to mellow out. the trip away from everything was somewhat calming, but it was over entirely too fast. i was now back at the party again and still tripping too hard for the setting.

i began to make arrangements to return home for the night. even though returning home was one of the least optimal things to do(and not at all what i had planned to start with), everything was really beginning to be too much. it really sucks having to think about your well being while you are tripping. talk about a buzzkill. survival just overrides everything. i can't even imagine the places i could have traveled that night if my experience wasn't brought to such an abrupt halt. luckily i managed to find my way home pretty easily and with good company. i cozied up to a bowl and some music for the rest of the night. although the next day completely sucked, as i was still off baseline and it was hard to do anything.

i really was amazed at the human spirit that came out that night. there was amazing energy in the air. i saw past all the little things that cloud the interwoven synchonicities upholding the fabric of reality, and i flowed with it. i can't help but think that all of the events that happened that night were small indications of destiny -- indications of something to come. the interactions i had that night happened from a long-shot, but they came upon me on a fateful breeze. i saw life, and people, for who they really were -- their true charachter. alot of things, it seems, are really clouded by the society that we live in, the responsibilities that we have to fulfill, and the actions we have to take in order to meet those responsibilities. sometimes these necesities conflict with the true essence of a being, providing them with a false sense of charachter. the true essence of a being, which perhaps ought to be brought to light more often than is commonly seen in our society. these kinds of falsified actions are based more around the pure will to survive, rather than the true essence behind the actions. i sometimes find it unjustifiable when people judge others based on their standing in society, their false charachter. i believe that our souls are our prime indications of our charachter, bound by an inescapable sense of fate. fighting this is only like digging a hole. who we are and what we accomplish in society are merely shadows, and to confuse these shadows with what casts them is one of the most destructive problems with our society.

i hope it is not too hard to relate some of the things i said to the experiences that inspired them. it's hard to explain exactly why i said some of the things i said, as the moment provides much more insight than my writings here ever could. there was much to be learned from those experiences, and i am still trying to wrap my mind around it. thanks for reading!

 

I enjoyed reading every word. I'm glad you ended up letting things happen on their own (originally). It's amazing where shit takes you when you don't impose your own will on it with LSD. Happy to hear that you're getting a jist of the flow again man, all the best.

 

thanks! i really shouldn't have been tripping in the first place tbh heh, but the experience was still very enlightening. lesson learnt! luckily i have enough experience with the drug that i can handle myself in alot of situations with a headfull of acid. just sometimes that might mean that the more positive aspects of the experience might have to take the backseat while i try to keep my level. haha. :hide:

'sall in good fun. :biggrinjester:

 

i love having conversations with people like you describe.
it feels good to be listened to

 

I would love to have someone on acid observe and feel and tell me what kind of vibe my being/character gives off. I wonder if it would be accurate, nice, or what I'd imagine them to say, or if it would be completely different than what I expect, or how I see myself. In fact, I wanna have ten different people tell me this, and see if they all come up with the similar answers.

LSD is a pretty interesting drug when it comes to insight.

 

great writing dude

a pleasant read indeed

 

What an awesome story. I've had similar happen, but I wouldn't have been able to use the vocabulary you did. It seems to come easy to you, the one-word-descriptions of things I spend hours describing only to learn that there is a word for it and it is an existing concept.

A good life-line when you need a little break is some whip-its. I think they could take away a bad trip, because it just always takes a few seconds to realize you are not "but a consciousness" and actually a human. Which cause great hilarity due to the remaining nitrous high by the time you are able to see things around you, and not just a giant single visual.

I've had that happen before. Just find anywhere to hide for a few minutes [bathrooms work, but they're not the first choice] and take that gas in your lungs.

I wish it was ok for men to carry purses, because I would when I'm tripping. some balloons, a cracker, and a few chargers is a fuck ton of precious pocket space while tripping.

[I just realized I should try closed-eye whip-it while tripping.]
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it seems to people that when tripping different people give off different patterns, colors, and energies my good friend always has blue and red lines coming off his face and once i saw different parts of his brain being selected and activated by a moving fluorescent red thing

 

A very well written different kind of trip report, Sounded like a powerful recreational trip in the presence of good friends.