Just want some opinions.

Ok, I just want some opinions, and I think this is the best area for it, if not then feel free to put it where it belongs. See, I met this girl, and originally I was interested except it turned out that shes only 15 (no-no in my book). But in talking to her, it became clear that she is extremely intelligent and mature for her age. So, I thought maybe this will work; I'll just be sure to take things slow, which I do anyway. Now I've found out that her parents, for various reasons, want her to have nothing to do with me. The thing is that my age seems to be the least of their concerns (under my dreads and whats usually all black attire). Now I can easily explain that whether I look the way I do now or with a crew cut and conservative clothing, I'd be the same person. What I'm not sure about is how to explain that just because I'm four years older, doesn't mean that I intended to manipulate her (I wouldn't do that to anyone, regardless of age) or anything of the sort. Sorry for being so long winded, I'm just perplexed as what to do in this situation which I've never been in before.

 

its totally kool. im 17 and my g/f is 13 but she is also very inteligent and mature for her age.il b 18 before shes even 14,i must admit it does seem weird my only problem is what others might b thinking. but age is only a number and if your happy together its fine

 

OK...She's 15...her parents don't seem to like you, for whatever reason or reasons.


I say you already have two strikes against you...why try for a third?

As far as you being a pedophile...I don't think so. I don't know what the laws are in your country, so I'm going to base this on my gut feeling. There is only a four year difference between you, and you're both very young. IMHO, there isn't a whole lot of difference in maturity or decision making at your respective ages. Now, if you were 29 and she 15...that would be a problem.

This may not be what you want to hear, but why not just be friends with her? If you both feel the same in another four years you can have a go at a more "adult" relationship...if not, you'll still have one more friend which can't be bad.

Before I turn this post into a fucking thesis, I'll stop.

Hope this helps.

 

Stop worrying about it. Age is just numbers. When I was 21, I met a wonderful girl who was 16 at the time. We went on to have a very meaningful long-term relationship, even though I don't really believe her parents were very approving of me. I think that was for similar reasons why the parents of the girl you're interested in are uncomfortable with your interacting with her.

 

no problem.
But she is gonna get some really hard times at home :S so that is not that cool.

The most critical thing about young girls is tah they don't have any experiences ( or maybe she has.. but usually they don't) so whatever happens she is going to get some ' first time' experiences and these are very tricky, these are the things she will remember. and when something goes wrong she will get hurt a lot, because she has nothing to hold on to - i hope you understand what i mean.

so i say IT IS OK, but don't forget to be objective about the whole situation.

good luck

 

ps i was talking about my own experience.

 

i can't see anything wrong with the age difference. one of my friends who's 15 is dating a guy who's 20 and they've been going out for more than 6 months now. Like AT said, age is just numbers..

 

I don't see anything wrong with it... If you love her...

Age is just numbers when love is involved, real love from both parts... If it's not love, then they're just numbers to a certain point, and I have a few very militant ideas to what I'd like to do to the older one in that case...

Love is never creepy, just beautiful

 

I'm fifteen. My boner's 18.

As long as she isn't a retard, sounds like good times.

Fucking pedophile.

 

When i was 15 i thought more like i was 22. Naturally, i fell for the guys who were 18-20 because that's where the maturity in [most]guys starts kicking in. Usually guys didn't mind that i was 15, but it did mean a lot of them would say 'just friends'. And there is nothing more embarassing than being the 'jail bate'. Of course, if the law wasnt involved we'd all get our way, right? If her parents don't approve then you should really back off for heavens sake, but otherwise ... just keep on l-i-v-i-n because young love is fun. Just be careful, paintitblack is right.. her mind is like.. glass ! smooth and clear when she is happy but once you break her heart she'll be shatterd in a million pieces. and THAT is from my personal experience

 

Well thanks for all the (positive at that) input. I really don't want to be just her friend, because there is really something very special about her. I've considered the fact that she doesn't have as much experience in life as me, but I only see this as possibly letting me help her to understand what I know to be strange, difficult times (high school). From what I've been told, apparently her mom intends to call me, and this does have me worried. If her mom wants to have a rational talk with me, I'll be happy as a clam, 'cause then she'll find out that in spite of my appearance, I don't drink, use drugs, or sleep around (I believe in monogamy). But I'm clueless as to what to do if all she wants to do is berate me. And I wouldn't want this girl to feel torn between me and her family (apparently when she told not to see me she was brought to tears). Again, thanks for the input, and sorry about all the babbling.

 

Don't be sorry. The only thing I'm concerned about at this point is that her parents are still unsure about you. Ideally, you and this girl will have all the support you can get from everyone around you, including her parents and your own. Especially in an intergenerational relationship, that makes things so much easier. That's what I've found in my own experience, anyway. I've been in a similar situation as yours, so I'll just tell you the following...

When you have a talk with her parents, just be yourself while being polite at the same time. You already sound to me like a very reasonable fellow(if slightly affected by pedophobia that is both a favorite and the standard in a certain leading country), so just let her know you treat her daughter with utmost respect. Besides, if you are in Sweden, I believe this girl is within the so-called "acceptable" age group, anyway.

Good luck, stand tall, and believe in love.

 

Must you continue to take cheap shots at Guam?

 

Her parents don't like you, you say? As much as you like the girl, no matter how mature she is, maybe you should just remain friends. After all, she is a minor, and there is, sadly, the legal system. But regardless of what you decide, good luck to you.

 

Ok, not that big a difference.

 

im gonna be hungry this morning and request a large breckfast ....im a feedapile cause i want a pileoffood .

 

i do think age matters to a certain extent. Particularly when you are so young. I'm nothing compared to what i was when i was 14. At that age we keep on experimenting things and growing up, what she might think today might not be the same tomorrow. Later on in life things get even out, say a 20 year old with a 25 year old is not so bad, cos they are at similar stages in their lives, so they can share expectations together. I do think age matters a little but even more so the people's maturity and so far i haven't come accross a mature 14 year old yet.

 

You might one day, who knows...

 

My reply is it matters who the people are.

As for me, I wouldn't just because it is my own person beliefs and morals so what right do I have to force my beliefs onto someone else.

 

age is just a number and it really doesn't matter. my fiance is 6 years older than me. The only problem you might have is because she is a minor (as someone else said) just be careful and honestly ... don't have sex with her - if you do it is possible to have a lot of bad stuff happen whether consentual or not. but good luck with everything and I hope everyone ends up happy