Let Me Be Serious For A Moment!

Okay, here's the deal...I have been in the process of possibly getting a huge promotion on my job for awhile now. I have been put kind of on hold by the compay through some little changes here and there. Anyway, I take my work very seriously, however, I also made myself a promise that I would never let it be the center of my universe ever again...

I am becoming involved, quite seriously, with a wonderful woman who I want to share all my life with. She has been hurt in the past, many times, and I promised her I would treat her differently. I also promised her I would never let work get in the way of us. And I meant that.

If I get this promotion, it will mean more money, which will help me to support the changes I would like to make in my life, but at the same time, it might also mean more stress, and possibly longer hours.

I think I can balance my work life with my home life, without it interfering with me building my relationship with her. I am just afraid of making the wrong decision, and messing everything up...Making her happy is all that matters to me, not money, or power, none of that. I've had all that, and it never made me happy for long.

So I guess the question is, should I take the promotion or not? I can think of pros and cons to both sides...I just need a little input from you guys.

Thanks, guys!

 

i think you should think about which one would make you happier, and go with that one
which ever you choose it's all up to you and either way i wish you all the best

 

DS, you know I love you. Why can't you have both?? Why do you feel the need to choose??

 

Talk it over with her. This is a decision that effects both of you. Just remember that money makes life easier, but only people are important... all the rest is just "stuff".

 

Thanks Jessie, Deb. Umm, I don't know, as for which makes me happier, of course the answer to that is, she does. She's wonderful. But, it's a bit more complicated than that...I don't want to hurt her, or have her feel let down by me. And I'm afraid that's just what will happen if I take the promotion. What if I can't balance the two out??

Right now, all I want to do is come home to her every evening, and love her and spend my life with her. I don't want to spend all my time at work...

 

Do whatever you think will make you and your ladyfriend happy. Good luck man

 

And thanks Wingman. You are absolutely right...material things are just that...material. The money is only important to me, as a means to live comfortably and stable. I don't care about having the biggest tv or newest car or any of that...I only want happiness...

 

Vinnie, hey man,wow. My whole clique shows up in full force tonight, hey?

She doesn't want me to spend all my time at work either...she knows that it's important to me, but that it shouldn't get in the way of us...You guys are right, I will talk to her about it and see what she thinks...

 

talk with her - you have to go out and risk something at some point in time. will this promotion, on the short hand cause more stress and more hours at work, but in the long term range, will it be better for the both of you. you're still young, think long term about the happiness of the 2 of you, while still enjoying the present

 

Material things decay and fall apart with time....they are not important. Ive known couples who have nothing but each other..and they were happier than those with nice cars and a condo. Good luck to you two....you know Im sending blessings !!!!

 

From personal experience go for the time together. You will never get it back and the years go by so fast.

 

Keep in mind that balance is the key, and money (or the lack thereof) does tend to put unwanted stress on a relationship. Money may not be a big thing, but in this materialistic world, it can get really hard to live without it. The biggest issue is that the two of you are able to live comfortably and harmoniously. Relationships have to bend and twist to meet each other's lives outside of home, and it can be really difficult at first, but the most important thing is that you two are able to conform and adapt to
any changes you may have to endure.


To be perfectly honest with you, when Daniel and I were unemployed, living off of couch change and money saved from our previous jobs (and tax returns, lol), I think we were honestly at our happiest. The novelty wore off eventually when we started struggling, and constantly being together anywhere from 8 to 24 hours on any given day would get kind of old. I wouldn't trade those 6 months for all the money in the world, but the stress was too much at times. Money is nothing to fight over and it really hurts when it becomes so "important" that it becomes something you do fight over. Dan had an opportunity to go to work for a couple of different places for a huge amount of money, but they required 12 hour days and him being gone weeks out of the month, if not months out of the year. That was definitely not worth even considering.

If you are comfortable and happy with the situation you are in now, the money you are making, the time you spend together, why ruin a good thing? If the extra money may add a little to it, while still keeping you together a decent amount of time, then go for the promotion. Money rules the world, but you don't have to let it rule you. Let your girlfriend play a big part in your decision, discuss the pro's and con's with her, and decide together.