Men stay at home?

Alright, I will bring up some issues here if you don't mind because I don't want this forum to die on me!, we have to score better than the women! errrr!!!


Anyway, seriously though: this discussion is about men who stay at home. Do you think they are losers because they stay at home and let their wives bring home the bread? or do you think that its okay that they can stay at home and take care of their children?

I know one family that is like this...the woman works and the man stays at home. I got used to seeing them like that but all the other men work. I mean he too is very knowledgeable and used to work but now he just doesn't have a full time job... and has to stay at home and also takes care of his daughter in that way.

Personally, I feel awkward seeing men stay at home, but I guess thats just because you commonly see men work so much that you find this odd... thats about it.

Anyway feel free to add any thoughts to this. Thanks.

 

Sorry I don't have a constructive comment. Just to say that I guess men just don't have nearly as many "issues" as women.

 

..

 

For me its not a gender role its something where one partner makes way more money than the other. People who see it as a gender role can be put in a time machine and sent back to the 70s.

 

For myself, This topic describes me. I am disabled, and have to stay at home. But, I do the housework. Dishes, laundry, etc...

 

i think everyone should just be able to do the thing they want to do and not have it looked upon as being a sterptype or a condraticing idea...

 

I think it's a great idea for other couples. I don't think I could do it. I don't want to be the primary breadwinner, I don't like having that responsibility. No problem with it being 50/50 for money, or him making more than me, but I don't want to be in charge of morgage payments, bills, food, clothes, vehicles etc. I can handle responsibility, I just turn into a giant stressed out grumpy bitch, so it's probably better that it's mroe 50/50. I don't plan on having kids anyways, so a stay at home guy isn't really in my future.

But I do think it can be a great thing for other couples. If the woman has a job that pays more to start with, or that she's more satisfied with it than the guy is. If a homosexual couple adopts, well, if anyone stays at home it has to be a dad hey It's not for me, but I'm sure it can work really well for other folks

 

I love your sig ihmurria.

 

i think its ok for men to stay at home, personally i want to be the stay at home mum, hey if a dude wants to stay at home great - good on them, i think for some men it might be a bit diffucult to ask their partner for money etc. and also not to be the one making the money but if they are fine on it great

 

i think it would be trying to raise a child (or multi-kids!) and support two adults on one income, nevermind gender. granted, i don't have a high paying job or a career or anything, so i'm not sure how much one person would have to make, really. (depends on a lot of factors... number of kids, location, etc). it just seems that the cost of living is so high these days, and i want my kids to have a computer, any medical care they need, safe transport (read: no worries that the car will break down on the busy highway on the way to school) and to be able to go to whichever university they want. if a guy stays home, he is not a loser by any means (unless he's refusing to work and puts the family into poverty or they go bankrupt). likewise, i don't expect someone to support me and my kids if they're going to struggle and be consumed with stress.

also, how long would the guy stay home for? just until the kids are in, say, 1st grade? or would it continue until the youngest child graduates from high school? what happens, then, when the kids are out of the house? if i was able to support everyone that long, it wouldn't be financially necessary for both to work once the kids are gone and the financial burden is lessened. but at the same time, it isn't necessary for him to stay at home any more. i wouldn't want him to just rot on the couch all day, that isn't healthy.

i'd definitely be cool with my huband staying home to watch the kids if i'm able to support a family on one income. my biggest concern would be that he might feel like he has no life outside of the physical boundaries of the house and grocers market. so i'd recommend for his own peace of mind that he volunteer a couple days a week or join a bowling league... something so he can interact with other adults. i'd worry that he might feel like he isn't getting mentally stimulated. if he wanted to get scuba certified or take some writing classes, i'd happily hire a sitter without giving him guff.

 

if you and yer partner have found a system that works, that's the best yer can hope for....it don't matter who changes the diapers or washes the bleedin' pots...

 

I'l redeem myself.


I usually always say "to each their own", whatever works for the family is great!

I personally would probably not prefer to stay at home simply because I am too energetic and enjoy a challenging career to round me out, but at the same time, family "togetherness" will be of utmost importance for me. But until I have a family, I will try to make the most of my career as a mad scientist!

Also, I grew up with neighbors where the mom worked and the dad stayes at home. They seem like a very functional family and have three kids. It worked fine for them. The mom worked for a coal mine industry, and the father had some mad skills at landscaping but still stayed at home. They bought up a lot of trashy property that boardered theirs and while the father was at home he spent much of his time landscaping and together they created beautiful gardens all around our properties. he also made a one hole golf "course" on his property that is pretty neat!.

 

It's not a contest, dear. Nor is it either or. Both the WIF and the MIF can survive, but only if there is interest. Heat and Matt have worked very hard to do this forum. It will survive if men are interested and continue to post here. Considering there have been no posts for at least 3 days, I am worried. I'll place an other Sticky in Smoke Signals and see if that helps.

The solution: Keep posting on the MIF and don't think it is a contest.

 

I keep checking it but nobody was posting on it and it pisses me off. I check this like 3 times every day.

 

I did a reminder post in Smoke Signals. Gentlemen (and ladies,) KEEP POSTING!!!! Cuz, the main reason a MIF is not a Main Board Forum is that it was thought there wouldn't be enough interest or traffic for that. Prove them wrong! I'd love to see this Main Board.

There are PLENTY of remiders and links on several other forums to intice people to come here. Let's not let the forum die. Okay?

 

Why are so many guys duches? It wouldn't be a problem if girls didn't go for them.

 

i know this is probably bad, but since i've never known a man who was staying at home who was productive with the family and children, i still have a hard time not seeing them as less than men. i know that it could be a good thing, but the only stay at home dads i've ever encountered personally were totally useless and unhelpful. however, as we all know, there's quite a few stay at home MOMS that way, too.

 

Hmm, I see that you are somehow right in some (most) cases actually... ofcourse this is based on my experience that - if a man was working before and all of a sudden has to stay at home.. layoff or whatever, he will have a tough time adjusting to this ofcourse it will just take time.

and I think the samething is true for women who are all of a sudden laid off also...

 

That is nice, actually I know a family where the guy stays at home to look after his daughter and does some pretty useful things which would not have been there if 'she' was at home.

 

People should have familys with like 6 adults.