My boyfriend has no sex drive!!!!!

I have been dating my boyfriend for a few months, but we have been involved for almost a year. I have a very healthy sex drive and am very willing to do almost anything in the bedroom. He has a low sex drive. I always have to ask for sex and get turned down frequently. I do EVERYTHING I can to meet his sexual needs and otherwise. He is a very non-touchy feely type with an emotional wall. I know that it is not me, it is just the type of person he is. What can I do to spark his interest and make him want me as much as I want him?

 

How do you know?

 

assuming it is just the type of person he is, i have to assume he is interested and wants you as much as you want him, and just has no sex drive.

 

The first sign of me losing interest in a relationship is when I don't want to have sex and would rather masturbate. That being said, I don't know your full situation.

 

One would think that it was lack of interest, but I know it isn't. He has talked about previous relationships and how the girls had issue with his lack of cuddling and intimacy. I know that no other woman he has been with has been as giving as I am in the bedroom and with everything else in our lives. I am a giver, he is not. He doesn't do things for others unless he wants to do them, and I am the opposite. That being said, he has only had 3 serious relationships (he's 30) and all of them were psychos. I don't know if some of the emotional wall is being afraid that I will end up being crazy like them. But anyway, I just want to not have to always ask for sex. Tonight I asked, and he said I'm not really in the mood. Then said "I would be more likely to want sex if you didn't ask all the time." But if I don't ask, I would maybe only get it once a week if that. I am a faithful type and would never step out to get my needs met, but I want sex!

 

Any ideas on what I can do to spark his interest? Especially from the men? I really need some good advice from someone (not about whether or not he's interested...I've lived with him for a year and know how he is....I need advice on how to get him wanting some action)

 

Without knowing him or you, just a few ideas.

1 Dressups. Try walking in dressed as a slutty nurse, or a leather-clad cop.

2 Porn.

3 Weekend away

4 Porn

5 Offer to be his slave, doing anything he desires. Put it in writing so he can't misunderstand.

6 Porn

7 Porn.

good luck!

 

I know when I lost interest in having sex with my ex-wife, all I needed was another girl for a little while. Then, I felt horny for her again.

 

Thanks Ivory. I've tried most of your ideas previously with some success. As far as the slave thing, he knows he can request anything in the bedroom on a regular basis and it is done. Like I said, I am very open minded in the bedroom. However, I have never tried porn. It might be worth a shot. We have porns, and I have been viewing them nightly after he goes to bed, but I haven't tried watching them together. Thanks!

 

umm,, get him drunk alwayz worked for me

 

Does he smoke weed? Because that could be a solution for his sex drive.

As for lack of intimacy, sounds like a more psychological thing. Maybe you guys should trip together. Sounds like he could use a psychedelic experience.

I really can't offer a better solution. These substances have helped people in other cases where no others would. Why not this case?

 

Alcohol always works, but we are well beyond our drug/partying days. I would rather not have to liquor him up to get him to lay me down lol.

 

LOL Did I say alcohol? I would never recommend alcohol to someone.

Cannabis and psychedelics are much safer, and don't dumb down your brain. In fact, they're physically some of the safest substances known to man. They have a lot of therapeutic and medicinal benefits. Psychedelics have even been used to treat alcohol addiction. There's lots of information out on the Internet, I recommend you do some research.

What else can I say? Counseling may or may not be successful. And trying prescription drugs from a doctor will probably just lead to a bunch of undesired side effects. He seems like he has big issues, and maybe a psychological rewiring through a mind-altering experience is what he needs. It could take just one trip. Then again it could also be really risky, if he doesn't have a good mindset. Perhaps pure MDMA might do the trick.

That's the only solution I can think of without breaking up. Sorry. Hope you pull through somehow.

 

Give him a hand job while he's watching a favorite TV show or something.

 

your never past your drinkin dayz!! just do it

 

He can't do drugs, as he is a commercial truck driver. I am in college and don't want to mess that up through drug use. I don't judge those who want to dabble in recreational drug use, however, it is not for me at this point in my life. I also don't want to use substances to fix a problem as I don't feel it truly solves it. I hear what you all are saying, though.

 

stop trying to initiate sex, cuddling, etc for awhile, like a week or so.
at some point during this time he'll pick up on the fact that you've stopped trying,
most likely he'll come around after realizing this.

give him a taste of his own medicine.

 

well, since ya'll cant smoke weed, try a hookah bar. You'll kinda get the same high, but it wont last as long. My first time trying it made me horny as hell.

Try masturbatin in front of him, he cant turn that down. Another idea, just give him head, if he declines that, there's something deeply wrong.

I'm one to talk though, I'm in the same situation.

 

Thanks BuckStacyBuck- That sounds like great advice

Homie B- Never tried masturbating in front of him: It sounds like a good idea. As far as head, he gets amazing oral sex whenever he wants. My period week is "blowjob week" and if he taps my shoulder in the morning the rest of the month, I roll over and give him oral before he gets out of bed to go to work. He has it good with me lol. I just wish he would try to please me like I please him.

 

i've never heard of a college drug testing.

you must be smoking some terrible weed.