My son wants dreadlocks...at 12! advice

Hi there, wondering if someone can help. My son is 12, he goes to a private school which has recently lifted the strict dress code. Boys can grow their hair and girls need not tie it up. My son has it in his head that he wants to grow his hair and have dreadlocks. I like to allow my kids to express themselves and was wondering if i should talk him out of it or help him wind them to get started. His hair is straight and fine. sort of silky limp, how do i do this and what are some of your thoughts. Anyone got a child that has done this? Do they regret it? How are they accepted. Private school with dreads is a bit out there but shouldn't i let him be himself?

 

This is a tough one, when I was 16 I wanted to get dreads and my parents let me but they made me take them out a few months after I got them.... If you believe in letting him express himself, let me go for it.. He won't know until he tries if he actually likes it. Make him take the responsibility of it though, but be sure he is separating his dreads or they will look like crap. I would have him think about it for a while first, though, to make sure he really wants to try. Kind of like getting a tattoo, since he's so young. Might just be this Bob Marley craze.

 

I Say Let Him Go For It, Your Only Young Once, And It's Not Like A

Tattoo Which Can't Be Removed, It's Just Hair....

Sounds Like You Have A Cool Kid...:2thumbsup:.



Cheers Glen.

 

A 12 year old with dreads...

Let him know that a stranger over the internet approves of his decission and thinks he very kickass

 

i stopped combing about 4 months ago and its really not a big deal as far as what people think and people's reactions. i thought it was going to be at first, but it's not.

 

Make them accomplish a goal, and then make the reward "getting dreadlocks". Or just don't let them get dreads until they are older so they can appreciate them more... Actually... If I started my dreads when I was 13 they'd be long as fuck now... Hmm.. Tough call, I guess my post just added to the confusion.

 

Sounds Like A Watered Down Form Of "Blackmail" To Me....



Cheers Glen.

 

youd have to make sure its what he really really wants - locks wont lock properly for at least a year; does he want a nest on top of his head? he's ganna grow up and wanna get a girl, and yeah dreads are cool and are babe magnets, but they can also work negatively.

personally id leave it - i wanted dreads when i was 13, but waited until i was 16 and had left school (got them the day after i left). its been a massive learning curve. so yeah.. id wait. if he wants them now, but wants them just as much in 4-5 years, then thats a good sign

 

4 months? How's the progress coming???



As far as my opinion, I second what glen said. Kids change their mind every other day. Let him experiment. He'll prolly decide to chop em after a month a go with crew cut.....for the rest of his life.

 

Thanks for the feedback. I'll make him wait to be sure, then research it a bit with him. Worried about head lice from school. Wonder what that would be like getting them out. mmm will look into it with him. Try to be a cool mum and guide his choice with him knowing the reality and taking the responsibility to look after them when he gets them. Best run it by the school principal too i think. He will be the only one. Good on him i think!

 

If its ok with the school, let him express himself.

 

He probably won't see it through even if you let him, unless you use wax to give him instant dreads. ← not recommending this btw.

I also don't think the school'll be up for it. Isn't there some crap in the dress code about the hair being "groomed" or something?

 

from the original post it sounds like it is now okay with the school.

 

Her post says they are now allowed to grow their hair, nothing about whether it needs to be brushed or not.

 

i had head lice in my dredies once , (caught them either form nice of nephew or at a festival) long story short they were in there for a very long time and were well established, built houses and bit the fuck out of me, I had to shave them all off, I was itch for months before hand and didn't know why,

 

Cutting is pretty much the only solution when this happens,

Advice if you decide to do it, avoid the companies that are selling you products, they dont work and just slow the process, plus there expensive and a waste.

Dreadlocks take a lot of time and will look like shit for ages, your gonna have to accept this about his appearance, it does get better.

Personally, I would let him have a go at it for several reasons,

1. He will be very unhappy with you 'controlling' how he looks, he is currently trying to find who he is, let him experiment, dont get in his way unless he is putting himself in harms way

2. Dreads take commitment, if he is willing to go through with it, he deserves to have them.

3. You will be considered the coolest mum ever

4. they teach you a lot about cleanliness, hygiene and personal grooming, something all people should know about.

5. you also learn what you are actually putting on your skin in the form of shampoo''s and conditioners.

im sure there are more reasons but i cant really think of them right now

let him do it if he wants too.... its not going to hurt anyone except him, and it will hurt like a mother fucker if he gets them backcombed in

 

Let him make one dread at the back to get it out of his system, and if he wants to keep it cool. If he wants to get rid of it, cool. If he wants a whole head, maybe discuss it with the school first... You could always spin it to say he is Rastafarian.. I had a friend at another school and they school let him have his dreads because he said he was rasta. That was a 16 year old.. Not sure how a 12 year old rasta would go down at his private school!

 

i'd say encourage him to get educated on healthy dreading and give it a bit of time. if you want to allow your children to express themselves i see this is a great way to let your son do that. since he is young, there's a good chance he'll change his mind. but even then he can cut/comb.

 

looking good, might have something in another 6 months.

 

He just wants them for the look
Just take him to a salon to get them done

Dreadlocks forum will all disagree with me for philosophical reasons, but he's just a kid that wants a cool hairstyle

I don't see why you'd want to disallow it

When you're a teenager there's not even a practical purpose to conformity like there is when you're an adult