Question for Homosexual Males

I have to make clear the fact that I have nothing against homosexuals, in fact, my best friend is gay and I love him very much.
The question is, why some men behave so crazy trying to look like women?
They way the talk, the way they walk... women don't act like that NEVER. Why is that a way of letting people know you're gay?
that's kinda annoying sometimes, looks like they're trying to get a lot of attention, but when people look at them, then they turn angry and aggressive stating you're "staring at them".. well.. how am I supposed to let that behavior pass by?
If you're gay, that's ok.. but just try to behave normal.
Is there an explanation to this?

(by the way, my best friend doesn't behave like this and he also, doesn't understand why several men behave like this).

 

there is no "normal"

people act how they act and all that matters is that they are true to themselves

 

Why do you act the way you do?

 

There are tons of people that aren't going to fit your standards, not just gay people. Get used to it.

 

Well, they did - back in the '40s - Bette Davis, Joan Crawford. Also, why do so many gay men sing Broadway tunes?

What you have to understand is that yes MANY gay men do these things but not all. And you likely don't notice the gay men who don't do these things because if you don't know them personally you likely haven't a clue that they are gay men.

Some gay men just develop an effiminate affect. There are even str8 men who have such mannerisms. It really isn't an indicator of being gay.

I suspect you do not live in a city with a large gay population - otherwise you may have noticed the large range of mannerisms that gay men exhibit. Like you said, your gay friend is not effiminate.

(BTW, just as an aside, admonishing gay men to act any way other than they are personally comfortable with is a bit confrontational.)

 

they can bug me sometimes too when they overdo things. some of these people seem rude, and some are rude. but you should learn the difference though cuz a lot of the time, its for humor's sake.
theyre not acting like that to let people know that theyre gay. thats just kinda stupid
the explanation would be a mix of things but i think its basically the same thing as a white person watching a deliberately black show. different humors, cares, and comforts.

 

You're shooting yourself in the foot there....

Ive often wondered why the highly camp nature of some gay men is equated with ''femininity". I myself, don't act anything like that, and I know lots of other women don't either. Yep, the ''whatever, girlfriend!" type attitiude is one shared by some women, but only a minority. Most women aren't like that at all.

I have no idea if its a way of letting people know they're gay, but in some cases, I don't believe it is. Some gay guys are probably just naturally like that, in which case, you trying to get them to stop being like that just makes you come off as very snobbish. Some gay guys maybe are deliberately a bit over the top, to show defiance towards society. As for ''normal'', there is no such thing.

I know he isn't the only ''straight acting" gay man who has problems with over-effeminate gays. I think they have issues with it, because they think that is how ''normal/straight" people view all gays, so expect them to be like that as well. Seeing as stereotypically, campness and gay men go hand in hand. It would be fair to say that lots of dumb people think all gay men are like that, not realising there are plenty of men who are gay that they wouldnt be able to guess that just by looking at them. As for your friend, he doesnt have to understand it. Some gay men are just like that, and I think he should just learn to accept that.

I completely agree that is all that matters. If someone is being true to themselves, and is harming no-one else in the process of doing that, then that person should be free to be their true selves without having others judging them harshly for it.

 

I feel that some people like different things. Some gays like to dress in drag or maybe living their life as a woman so they can have a sex change. Also many cross dressers are also straight men who just like to cross dress or for whatever reason it is what they like. That is why we are all individuals and otherwise we would all be the same. Sometimes people unlike things can not be packed up all nice and neat in a little box. That is whats so great about freedom. i am a gay man and do not dress up in woman's clothing but do wear sometimes woman's plus size slacks or t shirts and no one would even know they are for women, like hanes for her. I simply wear whatever fits and shop at a lot of thrift stores and am poor so I am a plus sized guy and not afraid to wear a woman's pair of slacks just because they say women on the clothing tag. I prefer comfort over fashion.

Thats just me. I do not understand why seems the typical gay man is thought to fit into a certain type box and expected to be knowledgeable about what is fashionable and what is in style and be interior decorators, I have no idea what is in style, I wear sweats and t shirts and my apartment looks worse than some straight bachelors pads. It is all about the stereotype.

Just my opinion, My grammar is not well but I do take the time to use spell check.

 

There is no connection between homosexuality, and being born in the wrong body. It always irks me when people keep connecting the two things. Some transwomen who were born genetically male actually are attracted to women, not men. So how does that equate to ''gay men who like living their life as a woman so they can have a sex change"? It has nothing to do with ''liking living as a woman'', and everything to do with feeling they are women. Its also of importance to note here, that most transvestites are in fact straight men, not gay.

Back when I was under the assumption that I was born genetically male (which I in fact, wasnt) I still identified as heterosexual and not gay for the fact I was attracted to men. Because I only identified myself as being female from a a very early age. I never saw myself as ''gay''. Just as a straight woman born with a horrible birth defect.

Sexuality and gender identity issues are totally seperate things.

 

Ummm, isn't that a contradiction in terms (sad to say)? People are individuals. And it seems like you want to lump everyone together.

--QP

 

There's your big clue right there, just cos you mistake it for effeminate, doesnt mean it is. Give it another decade or two, you'll eventually work it out, then realise the answer was staring you in the face the whole time. You have to ask yourself, what else does it resemble

LOLZ, hate to break it to you, but a lot of people tend not to spend to much time caring what you (or I for that matter) think of them

 

by "I", i don't mean myself but.. everyone else who feels the same way.

Thanks for all answers... even the rude ones.

 

Not rude... honest.

 

Word.

--QP

 

I was speaking on the persons who are going to have sex change and one of the requirements I thought was living as the opposite gender for about a year before having the sex change, not referring that they were gay. I was just giving an example as to why someone may be dressed as a woman before being able to have the surgery. I do understand that some husbands go through with the surgery and stay with their female spouse and are not homosexual. Sorry for any misunderstanding on my wording on that issue.

 

That is one of the requirements. Incidentally, I think I had so much trouble from my clinic, because I had never lived ''as a man'' so couldn't really "live as the opposite gender for a year". Because they saw no difference in the way I was behaving or dressing, they didn't take me seriously. didn't give me proper medication, (though I didnt realise this until years later) or to put me forward for surgery. Basically, I didn't fit the transsexual stereotype. I feel if my intersex condition had not came to light, I'd probably still be struggling to get proper treatment now. Although that was mainly discovered, because after about 10 years, I was finally seen by a great clinician who understood me, and saw me as a woman who had no need to do a ''real life test''.

I personally think the RLT (Real Life Test) is ridiculous. But now Im going off topic myself lol

I just didnt find bringing sex changes into the discussion as at all relevant to a topic about homosexual males. I always identified as heterosexual because I was attracted to men, even though I was brought up as a male. Sexuality is really a seperate issue entirely. I can now see what you were meaning though, and it was a good point. I think it is a shame that transpeople are made to go through the humiliating RLT, as they are expecting you to live as a woman, but with a penis. The concept is just stupid. And Im glad I finally saw someone who realised there was no need to put me through that process, as I had never lived my life as a male.

 

You asked a rude question. What did you expect?

 

Also, I should have added this sooner, but as for your "best friend" he probably just nods his head and agrees with you when you talk about this kind of stuff, doesnt really expand on the conversation.

He knows why they are like this, he also knows why it annoys you, in fact there is quite a lot about the male of the species he knows that he's not telling you , also a fair bit about the female of the species he knows more than you about (*Giggles)

 

Strange contents in this thread.
I've seen young gays (around 18-25) who are into eyeliner/tattooing and painted fingernails, lipliner and blowjobs, covered in olive oil. This must be some sort of stud rave subculture. If not for their bodies, they would pass as young girls sometimes. I think there was a website that illustrated this but can't remember what it was (friend landed on it and said horny guys getting all lush and gooey over each other...).

 

Yup, exactly.