Hi guys, It's good to be on here. I was wondering if I could get some words of wisdom about my relationship issue. My girlfriend and I are university students, and have been together for a long time, over five years. I like to think we're a good couple, generally. We share interests, we make each other laugh and smile, and she feels like a kindred spirit...at least, most of the time. It's an issue in the bedroom, I'm afraid. Whilst I have matured into a very sexual, open-minded person, my girlfriend has become quite reserved and conservative about our antics in the bedroom. Once you've been with someone for so long you'd assume you've explored each other's bodies and sexual preferences extensively. The sad truth is, because of my girlfriend's timidity, we haven't done much at all. On the odd occasion that's revealed in front of others, they appear surprised. I fear it may be because my girlfriend, although a well-liked and popular person, is insecure about her appearance. She's a little on the heavier side, and has been a bit late to conform to societal norms (e.g she doesn't wear high heels, lipstick, eyeliner etc). These things don't bother me so much, but they are impacting her attitude in the bedroom, and although I love her dearly I'm starting to get a bit frustrated. I've felt like this for well over a year. I don't want to leave her, because all other aspects of our relationship are healthy. I'm a very anxious person by nature, and I use our intimacy as time to unwind and just enjoy existing. But when my girlfriend rarely initiates, or acts creative or spontaneous, I get bored. At my age I should be exploring the wonders of sex, but I feel as though I'm stuck in a rut. Any advice guys?
Someone said earlier - "set her pubes on fire"! If you want her to get kinky, give her the 50 Shades of Grey books and tell her you won't have sex with her until she's read them all!
She once posted a very good photo on facebook, in which she stuck a post-it note over the "grey" in the book title, so that the cover read "fifty shades of shit". So that's out of the window I'm afraid. She's a very confident, outspoken person, I was so surprised when I realised how timid she was in bed.
Not to try and sound like like a prick here, but eat that girls pussy and I mean alot! Not only for foreplay before sex, but all the time. Just out of the blue throw her down spread her legs and eat her like she is the last meal you will ever have. On the kitchen table, the couch, against the wall, on the floor and anywhere else you can think of. If this doesn't make her feel sexy and better your sex life I don't know what else you could do. Well I guess the other importent thing is to communicate with each other honestly. That is the key to harmony. If you don't have that you don't have much.
I was considering doing this last night. She seems to be quite submissive, so I think a move like that might light her fire. I think I'll give it a go, although due to our little issue I am a total oral novice.
Well the only way you will get better at it is by doing it lots. Just like anything in life you get what you put into it. If it is something you have not been doing she will be sure to appreciate it and I am sure that it will help her to feel like you truly desire her. Don't just do it though for foreplay. Do it for her just to make her feel like the special girl you feel she is.
I've always interpreted her timidness in bed as a lack of interest. Perhaps if I actually initiate these things, she will warm to them. Or it will backfire horribly and I'll end up looking like a creep :juggle:
