So I realized today

I really talk down to people without intending to. I realized today, when I was having one of my kids paint wood things. When she was done, I asked her If I could help her and straightened out all the lines and paint globs and added pink trim ):
Assuming she would be happy with my improvements, I smiled at her and she looked a little bit sad.
I totally do this in my personal life too, my mom has complained about it a lot. I always go over what anyone else does and try to improve it. Today I realized, that is so self-absorbed and not cool. Who's to say my way is the best?
I mean I am a good person, when this girl peed in my car today I told her it didn't matter she peed on my seats and I gave her my favorite cardigan to put over the area she peed in, and didn't say anything when she sat on it instead, because I just felt so bad for her. Because my actions are more caring than my words, I think people who know me understand, but I must come of pretty crappy to people who don't.
But, the way I talk to people sound like they are the polar opposite of my heart's intentions.

 

i talk down to people intentionally...

 

hahaaaaaaaa that's awesome.

 

now that you recognize it, you are able to make a change. just think how much more effective you are going to be

 

that is very true.

 

I talk down to people because most of them are stupid

I condescend to people because I am an asshole

and I explain things accidentally.

 

so, maybe I should just accept that that's who I am?

 

I hope I didn't imply that.

if you aren't happy with part of who you are, make it so that you can be.

 

is it okay if I am happy with it, even though is may make others unheappy? Is that selfish?

 

Hey, George Carlin was the king of talking down to people and everybody loved him.

 

with the children you work with, would work on not talking down to them.

in other areas of your life, it may be different. but for the people you serve...yea, it may seem a bit selfish to the kids

 

glad for u that u realized that u had been that way by yourself, and hope the best decision will be made

 

everyone needs to be a little bit selfish

complete unselfishness makes as fucked up a person as total selfishness.

 

yeah, but it also shows them an adult who is activley participating and wants them to be their best.
plus the art project today was kind of expensive and I pay out of pocket for my play therapy supplies because the stuff the office buys sucks. Sp I was just irritated...was like, hmmm okay, planning on that project lasting an hour and a half, not you rushing through it in15 minutes.

 

my family never told me it was a bad thing to be selfish as long you you are giving and that ctions speak louder than words and all that. my husband is kind of the same way. even though he'll deny it, he is totally more affectionate when i clean-up (I work part-time, he works full-time) or make dinner for him etc.
Everyone should value actions more than words and follow through with actions, it would make this world a much better place.

 

this is exactly how i feel.

also the reason i hate most people and most people don't notice me.

 

Instead of doing it for her, let her do it herself though, Lyns.

You can tell her that she did a great job and still have her do her best, you know?

 

oh definitely understand where you are coming from (re: bold).

just an area to be mindful in how you present yourself, especially if the child looks a bit sad at the end.

 

yup. people don't learn anything from having their work done for them, but if you help them do it themselves they will know how to do it and feel better about it afterward

 

yeah...my mom used to do my school projects for me and i couldn't do them myself...and the one time i did it myself my mom said my drawing of abraham lincoln looked like a baby in a peanut shell.