still lactating???

Shoudl I stop taking my brith control pills!?

 

yeah, if you are on bcp, that might prevent you from having a good enough milk supply. even the progestin-only mini-pills lowered my supply. ((((((hugs)))))

 

hummm, that sucks.
Well, I tried this morning, but she kinda look confused. I let her play and explore anyway. She really doesn't remember that there's food in there, lol...we'll try again later this afternoon. Once she figures out (if she does) how to do it, then we'll work on buliding the supply.

 

why do you have to keep it a secret? it's not very important, I guess...I'm just curious...

 

I relactated my toddler and kept it a secret for awhile simple because they would have thout it sexual in nature and I didn't like that. I waited about a month before I nursed her infront of anyone but DH.

If this is similar to why you're keeping it a secret, just know that YOU know best what is for YOUR babe

 

I have to keep it a secret from cody, too. everyone.
it's a long story.

 

Goodluck!

I got into the habit of nursing my toddler while I was on my back. It was very relaxing for me. I did not have to worry about tired arms, or achy an tired back.

 

(((((((hugs))))))) That just sucks. Breastfeeding is just too hard to try it alone without any support!! Online support helps, but you really have to find some real life support.... Can you go to LLL meetings, and just say it's "playgroup" or something?

 

ooo yeah! good idea

how's it going btw? get her latched on yet?

 

It hasn't been going too well. I'm trying to pump a bit to stimulate some more milk.
Still working at it though.

 

kirsten, only do this if YOU want to. If you feel it will only stress you, then don't. I know most people know (like your family) would never understand relactation, I've worked with clients who didn't tell their dh's until it was a "done deal" because the dh saw them go through so much and thought that "just giving a bottle and stopping all that breastfeeding garbage" was the only solution to the problem. Also, some mamas get so frustrated they say "I will never try to nurse again." And, men often take that, not as a really frustrated statemtent, but as a life plan. "but you said you were never going to do that again." and then they get mad, because in some people's mind, what someone says they are going to do is always written in stone. My dh's family is like that. If someone says, "I'll never drive again." after gettting into a terrible car accident, they will criticize the hell out of them if they ever get behind the wheel again,. "He said he was NEVER going to do that again. Now, he's doing it." WTF is that shit with people? It's absolute rigidity. If that is the reason you don't want to let your family know, then IMO, screw them. People can and do change their minds. In very rigid people's minds (like my inlaws) what people SAY they are GOING to do is more important than the BENEFIT of doing the opposite if things change. They have NO understanding of changing circumstances. My guess is (especially since your family has a Germanic background) it is a similar story. My advice for dealing with Rigid Teutonic types, tell them to YOU will do what YOU want. Period, and that people have the perogative to change thier minds.

I have to tell you. Secretive breastfeeding is very difficult. She is getting to the age, that if she DID start nursing again, not only would she give it a name, but she would be going into your shirt looking for it. Can you at least talk to Cody about this?

Again, relactation is usually a complicated affair. Some mamas just use the breast for comfort, but this usually doesn't work with a baby who has been bottle fed since early on. Most babies at this age will really have no idea what to do. I have found the usual cut off (of course this isn't written in stone) for relactation is about 6 months. SOME people do it later. I worked with a mama who adopted a child over a year old from China, and she nursed that baby for years, and that little girl had been on a bottle since birth. But, this baby had a good reason for nursing, she had gotten little stimulation or comfort in the Orphanage, and it was an unusual case.

Kirsten, YOU are the only one who can decide if this is something you want to or even can do. You will most likely need at least the knowlege of you dh. Many of us have milk for eons after we wean. I had colostrum for 4 years after Lennon was weaned. I still have a little colostrum, now, and Sage has been weaned for about 2 years. Kirsten, you are the only one who can decide if this is something you want to do. I need to be honest. The chances of her just taking the breast, with no work, SNS, pumping, Lactation Consulting ect involved, are slim. I have to be honest. Babies who don't know what the breast is for are not just going to latch on. If it were this easy a lot more mamas would do it. BUT, if you WANT to, it may be doable.

Blessings

 

well, it looks like cody and I are probably headed for splits-ville, anyway, so I wouldn't have to worry about talking to him.
As much as I hate this, with all the crap that's going on now, maybe it's something best left alone. I've come to peace with it now.
I don't think I would have been very successful producing milk, anyway...I mean, stress doesn't help the production one bit, right?
I still have to focous on finding a place for Leane and I to live (who knows if cody is going to let us have the apartment he found...I'd rather he leave town and go live with that mommy of his, and let us have it, but it's highly unlikely), get Leane into that dayhome, and start college all this month.
This sucks.

 

((((((hugs)))))) I won't lie, relactation was very hard for me, and stressful too. It's not something to jump into when your life has so many other stresses and obligations. It required every ounce of my energy and time, day and night, to make it work. It required that I wanted to breastfeed Jenny more than I wanted to eat or sleep or get anything else done, and it never would have worked without the support of my husband and lactation consultants. It's okay if you have other priorities. Nobody can blame you for not trying.

 

You have to do what is best for you and Leanne. Don't worry, and be at peace, sister.

I am sorry things are not working out with your man. Would couples counseling help? Or is it beyond that? I am so sorry.

Love and hugs and wish I coule be in person for you,

Maggie

 

cody *almost* left today....well, he did leave, but came home later and we talked and cried and talked some more. We still have a lot of things to work through, but we do feel better now; we needed to clear the air of all the tension.
We both agree that living at myom's place has put a lot of strain on us. The good news: moving day is sept 1st. We think that getting some couseling could help then, when we're actually able to see eachother more as a couple and as adults....not 2 kids living at my mom's place who have a baby. She has pinned us against eachother too many times to count, and lies through her teeth....we're both sick of it.
So yeah, I feel exhausted right now....it's been one hell of a day. Thanks for the hugs and kind thoughts.

 

More hugs (((hugs)))

 

Yeah, don't give up on you two yet. Your momma adding her drama WILL stress your relationship. And that's going to make ANY marriage stressed out.

*hugs*

If you need to talk anytime, girly, just PM me.

 

dear we are in more of the same boat than I thought! that's exactly what happened to me and Axyn. we were absolutely fine and happy until I moved in with him and his parents. there was a lot of tension and distrust between his parents and I. his father refused to even be in the same room with me, much less talk to me. one time I even directed a question towards him and he just didn't even acknowledge that I had said ANYTHING.

just pm me if you wanna talk more about this.

 

tamee~that's awful. Cody's mom is much the same way, and it drives me insane....I say something, and she'll talk right over me. when she was here the other day, Leane was saying, "mama, mama," and she said, "NO! Not mama, you say dada or grandma." I know it's petty, but it still gets to you.
I think that parents, in general, are bad for relationships. For the most part, they always have to put in their 2 cents.
it's one thing when they're visiting and make rude remarks, but when you have to live with it day in day out, it makes you want to yank out every hair on your body!

 

i love my parents to death, and they love my kids and even my husband as if he were their own BUT it was still really, really hard to live with them. There are just too many awkward dynamics at work when you share living space with another couple, who also happened to raise you. We lived with my parents for almost three years, and it took us another three to get our relationship back on track after we finally got our own place. Sometimes people really do need to grow apart, but i wouldn't make any decisions like that until you at least give it a go in your own space. Good luck! Parenting is hard enough without the extra drama!