the heat in my house just died.

fuck its cold.

 

I know how you feel. Our door is busted so it feels like outside even with the heat, we took Amber to my dads so she wouldn't get sick. It's being fixed later today... it's taped shut right now lol

 

we've been waiting for heating oil to be delivered since monday.

if it don't come today, i'm going on a shooting rampage, stealing the oil truck and getting my own fucking oil.

this is ridiculous. Its 38 degrees in my house.

 

yeah we use oil to heat as well, but we filled it up in the fall, and we also have a fire place with blowers to keep the heat in here. it's a huge farm house though so it take a long time to heat up. and there's no carpeting anywhere which also doens't help on the keeping the heat in thing.

 

we had lots of oil last week, and I checked it on monday again, and it said we were almost out. 70 gallons just disappeared somewhere. There aren't any leaks, because the tanks are in my basement and I'd be able to smell it and see it all over the floor.

I'm actually thinking someone might have come in and stole it, but that would have been ballsy because I'm always upstairs sitting on a small arsenal, dog runs the house 24/7, and they would have had to have a shitload of 5 gallon cans to get it all out.

But I can't explain otherwise what happened to it. We didnt use that much in a week. Thats almost a months worth of oil that is gone.

 

wow dude that's fucking insane. yeah our's is in the basement as well, but we live way the fuck out in the center of a cowfield away from everyone, i have no neighbors for a 1/4 mile.

so u think some syphened your tank, how would they though? through the outside of the house, like u said with 5 gallon cans?

that's fucking crazy 70 gallons gone, u sure your wife didn't turn the heat up to like fucking 90 one night and it burned fast?

 

well, I always let the basement door open, because my neighbor is an 80-something year old widow, and I'm certain she didn't. The only way to get to the tanks is coming into the basement. My other neighbor is a bus garage, and the one behind me is the police station/municipal building.

And my wife is as anal about the heat as me. We rarely put it past 66.

 

so its a mystery.

could have been a ghost. I'm pretty sure our land here is haunted

 

damn bro, yeah i could see how it might be difficult to get it outta there then...

you sure u haven't david blaine over recently, maybe he made it disappear/or do the old vanishing act.

 

really where are u? cuz i've check my pubes and no one's there, and they aren't haunted either...

 

its a very sneaky ghost

small enough to hide behind a single pube, but with an appetite for heating oil bigger than a blast furnace

 

yeah he'd have to be pretty damn small for me not to feel him hanginout down there!

but i'd think i'd smell the stolen oil

 

he drinks it down, and doesn't waste a drop.

when he poops it out, its like what nibbler shits out in futurama. anti-matter

 

ooohh, wow anti matter, that little tiny thing that weighs like one ton.

can a ghost really shit though? or even drink, would it all end up on the floor?

 

somehow it transfers it into its own dimension

I'm not sure how. it won't divulge its secrets to me

little bastard

 

make it, man handle it, show it whose boss, then fuck it until you get some of that oil back!

 

fucking ghosts IS impossible apparently.

I've tried on numerous occasions with several different ghosts.

the dick is hard, the legs are spread, but neither of us felt anything

 

looks like u gotta just stick with the drama free pussy from your wife...

hey wait does she know u been fooling around with the paranormal, litteraly?

 

yes she knows. She hates it too because when the sex failed, she had to finish me off. And she was at work at the time, and apparently her boss got mad that I made her do it in front of the customers.

 

oh what, it's always better with an audience! like her bosses didn't know!