The Penis Monologues

My penis is a hickory tree sturdy and reliable, and good for rope swings too.

 

My penis is a two and a half ton bull ready to buck off any who attempt to ride without the proper training. You may very well have a difficult time hanging on for 8 seconds, but this brahma beast can buck all night.

 

I've learned that last part is definitely not true for me the hard way

(referring to OP =P)

 

Well let's just say my ex had a ridiculously high sex drive, and I had no trouble keeping up. In fact, she sometimes wore out before me.

 

Reading this thread has been one of the better parts of my day.

 

I have to wrap it around my leg due to the extreme severe largeness of it.

 

Some come with their own sidecar

 

we have a saying where im from...
"keep it in your sneaker"

 

haha-but what if I want to wear a skirt? That would be no good.

 

Don't step on it when wearing heels. haha

 

My penis is like a sleeping giant, once awaken it's grumpy, hungry, and ready to be feed



Hotwater

 

My penis is like a moped. Great mileage, always starts when required, but most people wouldn't be seen dead on it.

 

you sir just made me chuckle...

 

That was a rare breed of haha right there.

 

I just shot a fly from the ceiling..
it was my 101.791th orgasm..
crazy tiger

 

damn, tiger, I've had that many orgasms this month! lol

 

bwaahah..you're great,Droopy..

luckily the ceiling in my house..is not very high..
in my younger days..I could shoot half a cup..
now...bit lesser..but..the pleasure is still the same..
wanna hear you say that at my age??
please come to my funeral when I reach age 102..
old buggers..never give up...bwaahah..
crazy Tiger

 

hehehehehe. i liked the moped one the best.

 

hehehee, My house should have vaulted ceilings, then we could have a challenge.

 

Funeral picture of Old Tiger..at age 102..bwaahah