Top 1000 things that you can do with an egg

1000. Eat it.

 

999. Fertilize it.

 

Please follow the proper numbering.

 

Done... Must be my imperfect human mind misfiring.

 

Beat it.

 

997 - If I remember correctly, you can stand it on end for about 60 seconds during the equinoxes.

 

996.) Launch it at a house.

 

995. Dye it.

 

994. Fry it

 

993 Give it oral sex

 

992. Fold it.

 

991. Peel it (when hard-boiled).

 

990. Stick it where the sun don't shine (like in the refrigerator).

 

paint it black with a red dot on one end and carry arround the house thee times, then put it in a box between the cealing rafters in the attick or crawl space. this is supposed to be like some sort of desicant gell for absorbing negative energy. i've always been a bit sceptical of this concept myself though. not of the idea that things can be done that way, just that it's kind of like ant traps, you know the way they attract and keep attracting ants to wherever you put them, especially when the've been used up and are no longer working.

(someone else can worry about the silly damd numbers, but i guess this would be along about 989 or so)

=^^=
.../\...

 

suck it.(as in egg-suckin' dawg)

 

987- use it to demonstrate the effect of drugs on your brain

 

give it a name and raise it as your own

 

and the number 1 thing to do with an egg
dun dun dun....

1. yolk someone

 

992: Smash it on your brothers head and laugh at him all day long.

 

984^