What about celibacy????

what can you say for or against it.

 

Celibacy is a true calling for a very small number of people...it comes naturally to them.

Others who wish to try this lifestyle should of course be free to do so in an environment that supports it, but doesn't condemn the individual if it doesnt work out for them.

The imposition of complete or near-complete celibacy as a blanket rule for religious/spiritual organizations with large numbers of followers will do nothing but wreak havoc...this has been been amply demonstrated in recent times.

To paraphrase St. Paul's practical advice: "If you can handle celibacy, as I do, fine; if not, get married".

 

I can handle it well in my waking life......

 

I say good for you! especially if you are a brahmachari (student/unmarried) remain celebate.

-BUT-
if you are married and if you remain celebate then, then thats against varnashrama dharma. As a pathi/pathni, you need to act romantically with your partner to be happy. That is what shastras claim.

When a man is married , he swears that he will never hurt his wife in anyway, that he will be romantic with her and that he will never do anything without consulting his wife first. So I think you need to fulfill the varnashrama dharma if you are married.

 

Against: it is un-natural and can lead to mental imbalance. It reflects a basically anti-life ideology. Also, it is extremely boring.

For: It could be a useful device to prevent religious fanatics reproducing more like themselves.

 

Obviously you have never tried it even for week.

 

That is very presumtious. And perhaps also defensive....

you posted the question. I was giving my response. You have no idea at all if I have tried celibacy for a week or a decade. If that's the way you respond to those who merely answer the questions you yourself have asked, sorry for you my friend.

 

it never hurt anyone...

 

Look at it this way H - celibacy is like coca cola. Some people drink it all the time, others, like me consider it vile and possibly bad for you. And the coca cola company has had some pretty negative effects in the world over the years...just like celibacy.

 

Celibacy shows that you have control of your senses. Ofcourse, forceful repression of the senses will not accomplish anything

 

This seems like bitterness againts believers and in a believers forum this is not actually saying "I feel good about myself",

no?

 

I find it hard to accept that, having known in my childhood a catholic priest who was celibate, but used to visit my father and together they'd drink whiskey and smoke cigars....I don't think that shows much control of the senses. More like a reaction to some basic idea of the inherent 'sinfulness' of the body and sex in particular.
I've met non celibate anglican clergy who would never have touched tobacco or alchohol. And frankly, they seem more balanced and rooted in the real world to me, less pompous and 'superior'.
Some of the iskcon kids I've met over the years seem to be well screwed up with the celibacy thing - they come out with stuff which is truly unpleasant, almost like the medieval monks who thought of the body as a mere bag of bile.

The extreme versions of where celibacy can lead were discussed in another thread here recently - the one about the guy who can lift bricks with his broken penis.

 

believers in what?

you don't have to believe in celibacy to believe in a higher power, or God. You don't even have to believe in celibacy to be a Hindu.

How I feel about myself isn't relevant. You didn't ask about me, but about celibacy.

 

Well you did sound like a troll, with quick sarcastic comments.

 

Only because of your presumtion in saying I'd never tried celibacy.

Whether I have tried it or not isn't the point - it's that you make that assumption based on my original response, which is a fair statement of my views, coupled with an attempt at humour.

It's not good to jump to conclusions esp where internet communication is concerned.

 

To each their own.

 

If one can control his senses, he can successfully be celibate. Your ideas that pertain to celibacy involve those who are not able to fully control their senses.

 

Celibacy is I would say the key to open almost any door...sex energy wasted drains everything in the human being and makes him,,ahhhmm ...well...exactly what we see today.

 

I'm no exactly clear to what extent the senses can be controlled. It isn't the senses themselves which are the problem, but the way we react to the data they give us. We even sense that data in a way which is subjective. We see everything according to our own mind.

In the case of sexual desire, there are many components.
No doubt the sexual instinct is necessary, and that it is a natural and legitimate one. But that's only part of the equation. There is also the fact that sex involves two people, and the data we recieve from our senses is to some extent conditioned in some cases by our desires. It's like this -

I see an attracive woman, and there is a sexual element in that perception.I have no control over that perception. There is another person, and something about them attracts me. It could well be pherenomes. The thing is, I have no choice whatsoever about this. It simply happens, and the only way to stop it happeneing would be to retire to an all male enclosed community of some sort - where I'd probably daydream about women!

Anyway, If I am attracted to someone, it doesn't mean I then have to act on it - I can choose not to for a thousand different reasons.
And sexy isn't the only thing I percieve - as I contemplete this hypothetical female; the subtleties of mind and intuition have probably placed her in a social group according to my own view of things, on a deeper level, some function of mind has also placed her in a category of 'types' and so on and so on. All this can take place in a few seconds. As can the descision to act on the external stimulation or not. In most cases, probably not.

Sex satisfies a very deep biological impulse - an imperative even. Sexual abstinence can be painful, and beause this pain is pushed away, that can lead to frustration and anger which surfaces in other areas.
It can also surface in dreams. Which shows the artificial nature of most celibacy. It's still there in the unconscious. And that's the danger - the unconscious wants something which the conscious mind denies.

I'd say anyway that is our own impulses that have to be kept under control. But not stifled, or denied. We have little control over sensory input itself, other then to run off to a cave, and even then, we'd be no closer to controling what our senses tell us as far as I can see.

 

Correct me if I'm wrong...but perhaps celebacy is for those who want to make that sacrifice for God...it is a discipline for those who are ready to take on this discipline... I wonder if it is any good if we say we are celebate and lust anyway? Does that make you celebate anymore...?

Rather shouldn't what we do be offered w/ love... what exactly we offer with love doesn't matter (of course as long as it harms no one)...it is only the love. We could have sex... and offer it to God...and wouldn't that make it just the same as not having sex and offering it to God? But I mean this in the respect of it being rightly done, with pure intention, and sincerity...not by means of just saying it and not meaning it...but by means of developing detachment so that there comes a time where whether or not we are celebate or not doesn't matter.