Would a hooker help with sexual anxiety?

I'll keep my story short. My first girlfriend I dated for almost 5 years. She was a lesbian the whole time but didn't know it. We never had intercourse, believe it or not, and everytime we tried she'd cry out in pain and we'd have to stop before I was even half way in.

After we split I met another girl who was very sexually experienced. But every time we'd try to have sex I'd start panicing and lose my erection. It's a pyschological thing from being with someone so long that was so afraid of it. The second girl ended up leaving me after the third attempt.

So before I embarass myself any further I'd like to get this problem fixed. Do you guys think hiring someone a few times would help me get over this or would I just be even more scared because she's not even a girlfriend?

All I know is I want to get this shit fixed before I met someone again.

 

it could help. i say go for it.
it'll take positive encounters to un-do the sort of automatic process your body is following, it just takes time to open up

good luck man

 

of course it would help!

 

Yes. She could also help with giving you herpes. Nothing turns a girl on like festering warts on your dick.

 

...ya know that's what I've always heard but I guess I never believed it until now.

Yea, catching something would be terrible but I feel like I need to do something. And I certainly wouldn't expect a girl I just started dating to help me through it all... especially since I don't know how long it will take me.

 

Yeah man hire someone, as long as your not picking up streetwalkers its fairly safe, use a condom, have a good time. Escorts are professionals in their field and will make you feel very comfortable im sure.

 

I don't know. But if you do, make sure to talk to the hooker about it on the phone before meeting and get a sense whether she's willing to help you.

 

Yes, but..

You would be hiring the woman for her skills as a teacher as much as her sexual skills. A prostitute might not nessesarily have those teaching skills. If you go this route, insuring that the woman knows she's being hired as a teacher will involve spending more money than hiring a standard prostitute.

 

only if she doesnt laugh at you--some hookers are pretty mean--some are really nice--select accordingly

 

Letting the next girlfriend know about the OPs history might help.
Planning on doing lots of sexual things (but not intercourse) many times before attempting intercourse.
Playing with each other, putting several fingers inside her to see (and believe) that her vagina is big enough and it doesn't hurt would help.

The OP being himself (an honest, but nervous, virgin) with his girlfriend is key.

 

Thanks for the advice everyone. I'm honestly not really interested in hiring someone but I just want to fix this problem before I start dating again.

Maybe a councelor wouldn't be a bad idea either.

 

No, terrible idea... paying for sex lacks any sort of intimacy, which is the well spring your anxiety most likely springs from. What you'll need to do is take a risk, find someone who inspires trust, has the wisdom of patience. The way to fight anxiety of any sort is slowly, exercising your confidence like a muscle, the more you face it, at first by small degrees, the stronger it gets (Confidence). Take it slow. Their are no miracle cures for sexual anxiety, certainly not a hooker.

 

I think you missed my point.

The problem is that you are listening to your head ("she's going to hurt") more than you listen to the woman you are with (who's saying "put it in, put it in now!").

Not listening to the woman you are with is the problem. And you can't fix that problem unless you have a woman to listen to. A woman worth the listening to.

 

Dont listen to the girls and all that STI crap, you're more likely to get a STI from a drunken casual thing than a non street walker hooker. Girls just say this kind of crap to brainwash guys into not relieveing themsleves and being even more wippable

You're problem does sound more mechanical, years of negative reinforcement with a girl that didnt like penetration, go out stick it somewhere in a safe manner, get it out of your system. Probably a good idea to do this at least once before you even try a casual thing to ease your anxiety. Sex is just sex, repression is what causes all the issues

 

Marcher...a hooker is only good for old truckers on the road.

Not to help ease a psychological problem.

You need to think realistically here. it happened to you one time. Not every girl out there is a lesbian or feels like shes in pain, it was just a mistake with you and your girl

listen to lulu and find a girl you can get comfortable with, someone you know you could turn on. you're a handsome guy. Im sure you'll be okay.

no hookers, no herpes! then thats 2 problems!

 

Well thanks Stacy.

I guess I'm basing this on the girl who left me because of it. I don't blame her at all but I guess I can just keep my eyes open for someone who'll have enough patience.

It's all a bunch of BS. I just caught my apparent "gay" ex making out with my best guy friend at a party last weekend after she'd been hitting on him all night. WTF?

 

See thats another anxiety waiting to appear lol Dont pay attention to her. Shes a bitch for making you think she was in pain.

the more idiotic shit you see with dumb broads, the better girl you'll get

 

maybe, but probably just make it worse.

 

Not if you hire her to cut the grass..
Which is actually a good deal. They cut the grass in the nude for $200.00 :drool5:
Them Scott grass crews cost $600.00 and they aint nude and their all dudes..
Granted the grass looks like shit..
But beating off on the deck in a lawn chair, while some nude chick cuts the grass.. Priceless..

 

Chances are, if hiring a hooker lets you get past that, the only thing it will mean is you will be able to fuck women you pay to let you. When the next time it comes to a girlfriend type thing, chances are good, you will be where you are now, but poorer for the money you paid.

Be open with potential new partners (whether one night stands or relationships), explain the problem to therm.

If they laugh, it's better then them laughing when you are both lying their naked disappointed.

Find one who is understanding and open to helping you through this... without cash being involved.