You might be _______ if _______

You know, like the Jeff Foxworthy jokes, "You might be a redneck if you see a sign that says say not to crack and it reminds you to pull up your pants."

Well, do the same, you might be (fill in blank) if (fill in blank).



You might be a cop if you don't beat up black people on your days off.

 

You might be a poet if it weren't for the moon shoes you are wearing.

 

you might be a pussy is you smoke weed and get scared..

 

You might be a squirrel if you were really as nuts as you seem.

 

you might be a gamer if you sneak around corners on your way to work

 

You might be a pimp if you wear purple.

 

You might be a satanist if you wear eyeliner and cut yourself

 

you might be religious if you don't pay taxes

 

you might be an idiot if you put 3000 dollar rims on a 1000 dollar car.

 

You might be overweight if you eat cheese daily

 

You might be a forumer if you don't have a life.

 

You might be a baseball player if you slap ass.

 

you might be really stupid if you think politicians care about your well being.

 

you might be too fat if your car has been redesigned to withstand your weight.

 

you might be a dinosaur if your aunt weighs 900 pounds

 

you might be a corpse if you're dead

 

you might be ugly if people throw up when they look at you.

 

You might be losing weight if you've had an abortion lately.

 

You might be a cake eater if your name is charlie

 

You might be a stoner if you might be a stoner if your memory is bad, if your memory is bad.