More Ironic Conclusions.

Like I was telling one of my doctors at Sinai-Grace this Summer, I don't know if it was another coincidence. But I was reading about Mark Antony's eulogy from the play Julius Caesar. And for years I heard the line "But were I Brutus, And Brutus Antony". I thought for years he might be talking about another character named Brutus Antony, which was strange. I didn't remember a character Brutus Antony in that play. But actually what Mark Antony was saying to the crowd was that if he could switch places with Brutus, he would lose his rational argument to them. But he would gain Brutus' power of persuasion and Brutus' argument would fall apart if it was just a logical one. I felt like that this Summer. That if was more rational and cautious in my approach to what happened in the Summer of 1992, that began all of this unnecessary nonsense that now has me damaged and all alone and with an uncertain future. That if I was like that, maybe things back then would have turned out differently. Or if I had more of that fighting spirit and energy now that I had in 1992.

Because now Brutus has become Antony and I am getting much too old to deal with all of this. Especially if it's getting worse or nothing is being done. Or really I'll never know if anything was done, even if they tell me it is. And yet people seem to think that kind of behavior is justified.