So This Is Where Things Stand.

No, there really is nowhere nearly enough money saved up in the trust to pay for all the things that in the truest sense I really, desperately need. Eric always paid for all of that, I always knew he did. I already know there certainly isn't enough money to pay for my very expensive dental bills. That I just know. I shudder to think now what I don't even know of that he alone paid for. But now I am faced with thinking about that and worrying about that instead of just having peace and a good quality of life now. Which is all I ever really wanted. All I ever really wanted but was always denied, and I guess there will be no change in that. My car alone there may not be enough money for. And the car is not negotiable, I must always have it. For my independence, my medical consent, my quality of life, my safety now that I am endanger here as I explained, and so much more. It is vital, it can not be underestimated. I knew that even in 2005 when that horrible threat began of taking my car away even though I was a good driver. That's what made it such a horrible, horrible threat. And my financial advisor says I might be able to have a car now, if we buy used from now on. He actually said that just now. I don't know about that. Eric was buying me cars that were nice and new, with nice features cars have now. Safety and accessibility features all cars have automatically built-in. I was actually already planning ahead for an even better car in the future with all of that, that I just assumed yet again that Eric would pay for. And then he calls me to September 15, 2025, a date I'll never forget, to calmly and tell me with a carefree tone that he's walking away for good. He couldn't have possibly done the worst thing and at the worst possible time. I don't even know what other expenses he paid for that I never had to worry about. I just never thought of that, even though now I will find out. My life in the truest sense is ruined and over. And I already can tell the people in my life are lying to me. Like I said, a group home is not an option at all for me, now or ever. I'd lose all my medical consent there and be at the mercy of whatever ridiculous and reckless thing Wayne County Probate Court and the Detroit police are planning and scheming at that moment. I'd be threatened there, I'd neglected horribly there, I'd be in danger. I'd really have no quality of life there or any life worthy a human being. Although I guess like in the Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol "are there no prisons" speech Wayne County Probate Court and the Detroit police could always argue at least they are doing their minimum obligation towards me by keeping me alive. But they could just come to my door now when I least suspect it, even when things are going very well for me and I'm coping. Like they did July 22nd. And they'd take me to a group home, they'd lock the door behind me and all that I described above would begin. I also know that my financial advisor says my working a part-time job is a possibility. He must be joking. I never worked a day in my life and I really, obviously can't work. Especially not now at age 57. Well, he and others in my life are obviously all lying to me now, but that's what he said.

And that is where things stand for me now. My life is ruined, my life is over, I probably will never find peace or any quality of life. Like I've said, after all these years of abuse I had this wild idea maybe the people in my life would think they had some moral obligation to stop the abuse and ensure me peace and a good quality of life now. But we have the answer to that now. The answer is no.