When a friend admits that he is Bi Curious?

My friend and I talked about it when we were discussing cheating with other women. While it would have been nice, It wasn't worth the time, money and general hastle, unless it was basicly handed to you. My friend was afraid to cheat, because he was worried that he wouldn't perform well and the word would get out . Women seem to know who is a good fuck or not. When I was a bartender, that theory was proven positive . At 75 I could still get women for sex, but Im not allowed to do anything with women. Wife couldn't care if I sucked cock with my friend because there are no concequences. We do it, it's over, we get along as usual and feel better for it. It just doesn't happen as much as we would both like.

 

I was that supposedly “straight” friend recently and it’s ended up with me fully accepting my bisexuality, now thinking there’s a good chance I’m actually gay and fucking like rabbits with my first boyfriend at age 36. Don’t waste time

 

reminds me of how a lot of men go through life bi curious but don't end up doing anything about it for a long time and then regret they didn't start sooner when they finally do make the leap

 

I can appreciate what it took for such a friend to tell me that he was curious about what it was like to have sex with a guy. I've sat and listened to what they had to say, listening to the questions they had and, oddly I felt, sure that I knew the answers to them... which I did but I had friends who didn't need to know that I knew about that. Many were extremely nervous because they understood that outing themselves to me could be a problem, but I appreciated the fact that they trusted me with their secret; many, wow, I was surprised they didn't cum in their pants because as they talked, they were sporting erections which added to their discomfort. Some came right out and said that they were curious, and they heard that I could help them with that so... when could I help them?

They said that you shouldn't fuck your friends, but I was learning that if you couldn't have sex with your friends, who could you have sex with? If a curious guy came to me and was in need of, um, some help, do I turn them down? Act like I didn't know what they were talking about or, worse, act like I'm a homophobe? But if nothing else, I'd sit with them and listen and try to answer their questions while debating with myself on whether or not I would have sex with them if they asked. In the younger days, the answer to that question would always be yes but in the adult phase of things, yeah, I'd learned some stuff about pleading the 5th (and let's leave it at that).

 

I've never had a friend admit anything like that to me. If the right friend did, I would definitely accept the blow job offer and insist on returning the favor.

 

I feel like I live in a very different world from the rest of you. I've never run across an acquaintance let alone a male friend, or even heard about someone, who is bicurious, bisexual or gay. And I even lived in a university all men's dorm for a year. The only exception was rumours about a guy in high school being gay, and how he and a revered straight guy had sex. But neither they nor anyone else ever displayed any bisexuality or homosexuality, or stereotypical mannerisms.

I can't even imagine a male friend divulging bicuriosity to me at any point in my life (the exception is the sex my childhood best friend and I had together from 8-13, in secret, that started out with the regular, "I'll show you mine if you show me yours"). And I have certainly never even ever hinted about my own bisexuality to anyone in my regular, heterosexual world until most recently. Having said that, in the last 4 years things are also quite different, since I've connected with a quite large local gay men's community that I never even knew about before in this non-urban area I live in now. However, lesbians have been a different story, since I've known quite a number of them throughout my life, including 3 female friends I've hit on and was subsequently told by them they're gay. But I've never known any bisexual or gay men, outside of my gay activities, not until joining this large gay social group.

Yes, I grew up in Niagara Falls Canada, in a very conservative region, and now live here again at 63, but I've also lived in Toronto & Ottawa for many years, and even in San Francisco for a year. But I carried out all my sexual activities with other guys in utter secret, online and in gay sex venues like bathhouses. I didn't even start getting together with local guys in each other's homes, using online gay/bi hookup sites, until 11 years ago, back here in Niagara Falls. Now, finally in the last 5 years, I've started coming out as mostly gay to a few close friends--one male friend and quite a number of female friends, including a lesbian friend who is single, and a lesbian couple. All the women were easy to come out to, and the only reason I came out to this relatively new male friend was because I thought he was gay and would accept me--and maybe date me. Both he and the girls all did accept me, as I knew they would because of the type of people they are. Most of the other friends and relatives I have might not. I also came out to a woman before we had sex in 2016, who became my girlfriend for 3 years, and my two therapists.

But I guess to answer the question, if a male friend did admit bicuriosity to me, then, after getting over the shock (because of the world I live in that I already described), I probably would allow him to explore his desires with me, if that's what he wanted. Or I would guide him in how he could begin to explore his thoughts and desires, and how they are totally normal.