Another Trip Plan

You are nature.

 

chooo

 

I have a weird fear of insects. When I have dosed anything amid wilderness, I have been astonished by my surroundings. Tripping not only allows me to observe 'nature,' but it has helped me observe it (not just wilderness, but things like lightposts) much differently while baseline... as generic as that sounds.


Besides, what's the worstest thing that can happen besides all of your fears being realized as you trip over a large sandstone and pummel down a hill of jagged rocks?

 

i used to have this phobia to the point of screaming, LOL! DMT cured me! Via one hellish "gift" and via one hilarious trip to an "insect crack house." i'm so over it now - their alien, exoskeleton, more than 4 legs, chitinous, madiballed appearance no longer freaks me out. . . just kinda makes me smile and remember.

 

hah. for me it's not neccessarily a fear, but just the dirt, not having a chair or couch to sit on (yes, yes, sit on the dirt!), and the whole idea of "whoa, nature man, you gotta try it! it's nature!" seems a bit arbitrary and forced,

but alas, I will give it a shot. The fact that I'm tripping itself should make it enjoyable, but if it helps me observe and appreciate nature differently when baseline then great.

 

Spicey I'm curious how you deal with your husband who doesn't like it when you trip. I haven't done acid in a long time but being around that energy would really bother me, even if it was in the other room. For me it would creep into my unconscious and probably be a trip theme. has that happened to you?

 

Haha. I know what you mean.

If I just go on a hike and dose it just sort of happens.

 

Well, i've got the doses prepared - looks like a big strip of paperboard and have cleaned my Vaporgenie (minus any residue from last night's 6 mg 5-meo-DMT journey). My husband nervously asked me this morning how much acid i planned to take. i said A LOT, then said like 5 WoW's. He replied Okay. Then i said, "Hey, they're like 50 micrograms each. i know that's not a lot compared to what we used to do and what you used to do in the 1960's but for me today, that's A LOT." He smiled as if he thought it wasn't a lot. He still hasn't tried a WoW dose, he he. i have warned him i will be very disconnected from reality tomorrow and am leaving cold chicken and fruit for him to eat.

i've been doing some venting - done now and am glad that is out of my system. i have also been doing a lot of quiet thinking/meditating and a lot of general cleanup and organizing of my mess in preparation for this journey. My husband thinks i've lost it - i've vacuumed 3 times already this week!

i feel more than a bit of quivering, shakiness in my core, but am okay with it. Right now my main fear is that i will not be able to face the DMT dose when the time comes (peak) as this is a big dose for me and this is hard for me at any level dose. Somehow i think i'll be able to pull it off though, or at least close to that time.

This anticipation is the strangest sort of adult excitement. Can hardly wait to go, yet simultaneously dealing with more than a subconscious level of dread. Like a kid looking forward to going to Disneyland and getting a beating or something. Not trying to beg trouble, but very aware of some nervousness and delighting in it. It is a strong kind of feeling and borders on novelty for me. Tomorrow i'm going to climb to the high board and dive right into the deep end. And i'm the kind of girl who really likes to put a toe in first, then an ankle, then . . .

 

All I can tell you is trust in the lysergic molecule to take care of you. I have taken her in a giant dose, unprepared before, and she held me up and gave me nothing but love and light.

this is not DMT spicey, there are no entities to kick your ass for daring to think you belong here. lsd will treat you proper.

 

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LOL! Thank you so very much. Yes, i recognize how very blessed i am in my life right now. i owe it all to N,N,DMT.

i think it is worth my repeating over and over again, even if it gets me burned here, metaphysically, whatever. i do not believe in enlightenment, and honestly tend to think those who make claims about it are all charlatans.

i am hoping for a bit of healing, helping and personal insight. i am hoping for a kind of mental and metaphysical cleaning out - this has done the trick for me in the past the 2 times i have successfully attempted it. There has been so much pain an loss in my life to date. And more to come. As i have mentioned here and elsewhere, a creeping sense of malaise, low-energy, pseudo-depression has been trying to creep up on me this entire month. i am hoping to shed some light on all of this. i am hoping to be reminded of what i know in the deepest part of myself is the fundamental message of these materials for me. Sometimes the daily bullshit, stacking for 6-12 months, introduces a disturbing level of distance between consensual reality and the fundamental message.

Beyond, that, i am hoping for a taste of novelty, which these experiences still tend to offer in large quantities for me. Should be an interesting day, regardless.

 

Well hopefully you get the Disney Land and a lecture instead of the beating.