anyone found their 'soulmate'?

Discussion in 'Relationships' started by MsAmazo, Oct 19, 2004.

  1. purplehze

    purplehze Member

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    I found my soul mate, he was my first love, the man who i lost my virginity too, my best friend and yus my soul mate, we was together a year and a half, it ended due yo him being unfaithful,but i have forgivern him and we are so close. Were alwaysthere for eachother and he is my soul mate, we know each other better than we know ourseleves, we love each other still. If you dnt beileve in soulmates, the next best thing is a best friend.
     
  2. Applespark

    Applespark Ingredients:*Sugar*

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    yes. we have been together 8 years this December. We met through a mutual friend before my freshman year in highschool. We went out oficially moths later. We went to seperate schools etc. hes 10 months younger. After I graduated we ended up pregnant. We had been together 3 years by then. We have had our ups and downs like everyone else has. We have a house and a 3 year old (almost) and we are getting married hopefully next year sometime ( yogi for peace)
     
  3. monosphere

    monosphere Holly's Hubby

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    It seems that most people here believe that their soulmate is someone you're romantically involved wtih. I have to wonder if that's the case. Is a soulmate your spouse? Could they be your friend? Or how about sibling, like twins? Or maybe a loyal pet? Not everyone has the chance to find true love and all the fun stuff that goes along with it. If that's the case, then does that mean that these people don't have soulmates? I'd hate to think so. I've spent a large part of the past year or so thinking that I had lost mine before realizing that she was that one. A good friend of mine also had to question whether or not we have only one soulmate or several for different aspects of our lives, or for whatever reason. I've been thinking about this for some time now. Any feedback?
     
  4. MsAmazo

    MsAmazo Member

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    I've been thinking about it a lot too (hence the thread), and I do believe our soulmates are out there.. they're not necessarily going to be our lovers, though i'm sure it's amazing when they are. I'm just getting into the whole idea.. I feel this strong connection to someone I haven't even known for very long. When we're together it just seems perfect and natural.. :rolleyes:
     
  5. ::TheConcreteGirl::

    ::TheConcreteGirl:: Senior Member

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    you know what? I have no clue.... I thought the last guy i was with was my soul mate..and based upon that belief I made some stupid mistakes... Right now theres someone I like a lot..I actually believe I love him...but...I dont believe this is reciprocated..we are awesoe friends, and in that sense, we are soulmates..do you think a soulmate can only be found in a signifigant other?
     
  6. BlackGuardXIII

    BlackGuardXIII fera festiva

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    Our 1st date was on the night of December 13th, 2003, we are 13 years apart in age, when we fell in love she was 26 (13x2), and I was 39 (13x3). Although we were together only 3 months, there was a Friday the 13th in February. When I asked her how old she was, she told me to guess, & I said "I bet that I moved off of Vancouver Island (we both grew up there and she was born there) before you were born", (I moved when I was 13). So she asked me when I moved, I told her I moved at 1 PM on Saturday, July 2nd, 1977, Eileen laughed and told me she was born just 8 days later, on Sunday, July 10th, 1977. So I was right...by 8 days. My mom, Elna, was born on July 13th. Elna passed away during the night of March 20th, 1993 at the age of 52 (13x4), Eileen was hit on the morning of March 19th, 2004, exactly 1 day less than 11 years later. Both of our moms died as a result of their chronic alcoholism. That night the urge to find Eileen & befriend her came over me with such an urgency that I just had to do it, no question at all. The impulse to make sure that I found her that night & that I do whatever I had to do to make sure that we become friends was a totally new overwhelming compulsion, unlike anything that I have ever experienced in my life. I've never had anything compel me with that kind of clarity and urgency before or since. Though it was not a voice telling me to, I felt as though it came from outside of me. I was totally infatuated with her but absolutely refused to hit on her, because being friends was so important, it was almost as though I was following orders. We both tried to hide our strong feelings from each other. I could see something in her eyes, but did not know what it was, just that it was fascinating and powerful. We had only spoken maybe six times in the previous 1½ years, yet we were both too shy to say how we really felt, & also both positive that the other would not be at all interested. The need to find her that night was something I wondered about a lot afterwards, & I told her about it many times before her injury. The first night she slept over was December 17th, and then she moved in on December 21st. Then on December 31st she proposed to me. Our time together was like we were on a mission to spend every second together. We both practically feared being apart. I told her many times that I'd enjoyed the short time we'd been together more than the whole 39 years of my life before that, & that if something happened tomorrow, like she decided to walk out, I would not regret a second of our time together. She was constantly worried I'd change my mind about her. I was also anxious that she would realize she had made a mistake, and leave. If she didn't know where I was sometimes she'd panic, & it would take me half an hour to calm her down, she was so worried. We both acted like we had no time to waste, & we talked daily about how we could not imagine anything possibly keeping us apart. We also both assured each other daily that no matter what, come what may, we were going to do whatever it took to stay together. So, although we both felt this incredible love for each other that we were sure nothing could tear apart, we were both so worried about something happening that we had to constantly reaffirm it. She once told me that looking at me was like looking in the mirror. She said she'd never in her life felt like she was at home before she moved in with me. I told her the day she moved in that every single thing in our home was half hers, including the actual condominium, & that I meant it even if she decided to move out the next day. She said she would never take a thing, which I totally believed, she was so giving & was always giving me little gifts. We shared many synchronicities each day. It was a 90 day waking fantasy. We couldn't get enough of each other, & were working on how we could be together 24/7. I didn't sleep much at all for that 3 months. I constantly wrote her poems, 15 in 3 months, when I'd written 4 or 5 for my ex in 5 years. I've had more dreams with Eileen in them in 5 months than in 5 years with my ex. & the 1st one was about the end of the world, yet we were both content to lie on the grass & gaze into each others eyes in complete joy as the Earth's atmosphere dissipated into space. We agreed on so many things, it was a challenge to find differences, & we actually spent a lot of time trying to find things that we differed on. She likes liver & peas, I don't. I like spicy food, she doesn't. She's afraid of heights, I'm not. We tried to find more but that's all I recall. I must've asked her 100 questions the 1st month, as they came to me, things where my ex & I differed. Eileen agreed on every one. We both had held intimate fantasies we'd wanted to fulfill for many years, & we did. It was not like real life. It was way too good. I think that's what worried us both so much. We'd hold each other & both cry some nights we were so insecure. I said yes without a pause when she proposed, I didn't think about it. Having a woman propose to me was something I'd hoped for all my life, so of course it was her that did it. We both used to get drunk at lunch time in grade 6. How many kids do you know that did that? There were a million things like that. We were both beyond each other's dream partner. On December 17th , the 1st night she stayed over, I had the best sleep I'd had in memory, which I needed since I didn't sleep much after that. We were both trying to outlove the other, discreetly, of course. She amazes me every day still. When she let me know her feelings were more than friendship, I was already ahead of my goal. Yet still each day she'd do something else that made me love her more. Today it was sitting up in bed so that for the 1st time in 9 weeks I could hold her in my arms. We both constantly thought about what we could do for each other & did whatever we could do for each other. That was all we wanted to do. She told me that I was the first man she had ever been with that she never felt like she needed to take a break from. I realized I felt the same, and never had with anyone else, too. About 4 days after the accident, I opened the closet where all my climbing & hiking, snowshoeing gear is, which is always just a big pile, & it was all organized. That broke my heart. We were never angry at each other for more than half an hour, & then it was like nothing had happened the next moment. I wondered why none of my other ex's & I could not do that. She knew EXACTLY what made me happiest, cuz usually the same thing made her happiest. We talked with our eyes, or in perfect stereo many times a day. We'd say the same thing in the same words, at the same speed, same tone, at the exact same time, or a fraction of a second off. At 1st it bugged us both. We would say "quit it, you're freaking me out." But after a couple of weeks of it, I guess it dawned on us how special it really was and we liked it. Then, as soon as we started to do it, after one or two words, we'd stop, and look at each other, and just know what we were going to say, and smile about it. We didn't dare show sadness around each other cuz we knew the other would instantly feel the same thing.
    We were both very protective of each other, looking out for each other like you would a baby, right from our 1st date we were like that. I know she'd have taken a bullet for me, & was always eager and ready to jump up to my defense, I could see it, & besides I was ready to do the same. We both could not say I love you enough times a day, & never got tired of hearing it. She'd unlock & open the car door for me. We both never missed a you're welcome or a bless you, never mind a thank you. She's the only person more vigilantly polite than me I've met. We're both gentle, yet we've both been in many fights, & are both pretty tough. I saw how serious she became the second she knew someone was bothering me. I was the same, ready to take on the world at a moments notice. There was a constant underlying sense of urgency in our relationship; we acted like we were trying to meet a deadline every day. The day she got hit by the car, we were riding bikes together, but my bike broke down 200 yards before where she was hit. A piece of aluminum as thick around as my thumb snapped off like nothing. It just came off in my hands. She said I should walk my bike up to the gas station & she'd get her friend to come pick me up.
    It was only 200 yards ahead, but I said I would rather just walk my bike home 1 1/2 miles in the rain instead, As she rode off she called out "Love You!", & I called back "I Love You!" and I could hear both of our voices echo off the buildings. I am glad I didn't see the car hit her. We both loved each other just as we were, unconditionally, & didn't expect or require the other to change in any way. I guess that it was because of that that we were both motivated to find out what we could change about ourselves to please the other, & then do it. We were so totally at ease & comfortable together that 1st night, it was like we'd been best friends all our lives. It just felt right, like we belonged together, and had finally reunited after a very long absence. We knew each other that well, that soon.
    When the ambulance went by me as I walked my bike home I thought `I sure hope that's not for Eileen', but then I thought nah it couldn't be. Because she had been hit by a pick up truck four blocks up that same road two years ago, & almost died. It didn't make the corner & came up on the sidewalk, & if it hadn't hit a lamppost would have killed her. She had broken ribs, a broken hip, & other injuries. Witnesses thought she was killed and called her the miracle girl. That was why I felt sure it could not be for her. Just as I have done so many times before, when I'm absolutely certain about something, & would argue it with anyone, I'm wrong.
    Yesterday, May 30th, Eileen said `hi' & then was saying hi to everyone who entered the room. She is now like a strong, 100 pound baby, & is rapidly healing. I am so proud of her. I call this a miracle. I have had at least half a dozen premonition dreams. Two days ago, after I finished giving Eileen some apple juice, and I said 'all gone', she said 'aww gaww' and I praised her, knowing exactly what she meant. It was March 28th, her first words. About an hour after I got home that night I remembered a dream I had over 7 years ago, (5 years before I met Eileen) where I was in a department store with the Fresh Prince & I was holding a little black baby girl in my arms. I asked Will Smith if she was his & he laughed & said no. I wondered who's baby she was, & when I looked into the pupils of her eyes I saw these sharp swirling crystal snowflake things that were sparkling. She then spoke to me, & I thought to myself that this baby is special, babies don't talk. I never understood what that dream meant, but I never forgot it. Well, Eileen has the most incredible deep, dark brown eyes I have ever seen. At first they were kind of scary there is so much power in there. That night I realized I had been holding Eileen in my arms, she had a diaper on, and was at the stage of progress of a baby. And then she spoke. My girlfriend at the time I had the dream is black, the same as the baby, & now Eileen, my partner, my fiancee, is like a baby, & an hour or so after she said her first words last Friday night, it hit me. That dream was about her. I no longer have any doubt what that dream was about.
    June 6th, Eileen is improving quickly, although she disagrees, & shakes her head when I tell her so. Tonight she said many words, "more, please, yes, no, juice, candy, pudding( pretty slurred but recognizable,) & F___ off! which was recognizable by her one finger salute to go with it.
    Two things stood out, she said what I thought was I love you, so I asked if that was what she said & she said yes. I told her she has a long hard battle ahead of her, & she said 'yes'. I said, 'but you decided to come back anyways didn't you?', & she said 'yes'. I asked her 'why baby why?', & she said 'For you.'
    June 11th: Well, Wednesday night I went to see Eileen & said I love you like I always do, but this time she answered back, 'I love you, I love you', & then said 'kiss, kiss'. We had a great visit, but it didn't end well. I have been giving her juice & pop, against the therapists orders. No thin fluids, she might choke. I have been doing it every night for two weeks, & sure she does have a hard time with swallowing, but that is why she wants to practice so much. Five days after I started giving her juice, they posted the now juice rule, & I was not happy, cuz she wants juice, so I kept giving it to her...Until Wednesday night. A nurse called security on me, after trying to convince Eileen that she couldn't swallow yet. To which Eileen responded, yes I can. The nurse asked if her if she thought we knew better than the doctor & Eileen said yes. I said, I have seen Eileen every day for the past 83 days, and the doctor hasn't, so the nurse asked Eileen, do you think Ken knows more than the doctor, & she said yes. She left the room & unknown to us, went & called security. I got my bag ready and put my jacket on, and just before I left Eileen asked me to get a nurse ,so she could be changed. I went & told the nurse, & she said I had better get going since the guards will be making their rounds soon. I went & told Eileen that she had called security on me. I just knew she had. Then the guard showed up & I had to go. Eileen kept saying no wait a minute. That nurse really upset Eileen that night, & I will not forget. A friend, Patti in Texas, who has had some kind of contact with Eileen all the way from Texas emailed me that night, her message was frantic, Eileen is crying, a night nurse is abusing her, she is very sad. I didn't sleep all night, & called the floor twice & had them check on her. It was the scene with the guard she had picked up on I think.
    Yesterday, I asked her how her night was, No good, she said. Why not? They're mean! Who? Nurse, mean to me. you stay. But I could not, so I have filed a complaint, & set up some meetings to get this dealt with. Tonight she said the same, take me home, stay here tonight with me, don't go...but of course I can't... That night I ran into the guard that escorted me out the night before, and she didn't even recognize me one day later. I passed her in the stairs, she said how are you? Well, I didn't get kicked out I said. Why would you, she asked? Once I reminded her that 24 hours earlier she'd escorted me out for giving my fiancee juice, she remembered.
    Today she talked about going to see ducks. She said 'See the ducks in the park,' & I said sure when you get better. She said it at least three times, and I could not figure out what she was getting at. But then my friend in Portland Oregon had emailed me tonight and asked if Eileen had mentioned going to see the ducks in the park with her, because she really liked it. Yes, she did, I replied. This stuff is not surprising me as much anymore, though it is very amazing, and I will never forget it. Eileen spoke to me two weeks ago, as I was typing out some of my dreams onto a message board online, and asked me if I remembered a dream about us finding a wheelchair in front of the Red Apple Grocery, & me lifting her into it, but I don't remember having a dream like that. Still, the fact that I heard her talk to me when she was in the hospital and I was at home is the main thing. & another woman told me she has visited her in Nova Scotia, right across the whole country, at work, to talk to her about me. I asked Eileen if she went & visited someone at work & she said yes. Is she nice, I asked. Yes. I really believe her. I always did like that kind of thing though. She wanted me to take her to the bathroom tonight so I carried her from her bed into the bathroom but there was no way I could do all the maneuvers required, so we just hugged for a while & I saw that she can stand up for brief moments.
    About a month ago I had a dream that had the name White Bear in it & I could not remember anything else, so I thought this must be significant, but I couldn't figure it out. 3 weeks later on another site, I went to the This day in Native History board, & decided to look up the day Eileen got hurt, March 19, 2004. The Native Legend posted for that day, March 19, 04 is called " The White faced Bear", cool eh?
    June 22nd: Eileen said the name Mike at least 5 times, & I did not know why. That night i had a really good chat with a member whose name, I found out later, is Mike. I had not met him before.
    July 4: Well, I am so glad that they have moved Eileen out of the hospital, as the nurses there called security on me four times. After the juice incident, I was caught laying on her bed with my arm around her, & her resting her head on my shoulder. Of course we were fully clothed & in full view of three other beds at the time. The policy there was, call security first, ask questions later. If a nurse had even suggested I should not hold my fiancee in my arms as it was against the rules I would have been up in a flash, but no, security had to come. Then security kicked me out 15 mins. past visiting hours, when other nurses let me stay two hours past. The final security breech was to wheel Eileen in her wheel chair across the street. Though we used the crosswalk, & I was watching the vehicles like a hawk guarding its babies, it was a Big mistake, I should have known. My brother calls me rainman. After four security encounters I was shell shocked, so boy am I happy she is out of there. I did some research into names the last few days & came upon more coincidences. I mentioned Eileen's b'day is 3 days before my mom's & she was hit 11 years to the day after my mom died. Well my mom's name was Elna, & when I looked it up on a 'name meanings' website, they had no meaning for it, but suggested other names to try, & of course Eileen was one of them. Next I looked up the name Seena. My grandma had a baby girl a month after I was born & named her Seena. They had no meaning for that name either. Now this is a stretch, but it is true. Eileen told me she did not like her name. SO I asked if she knew that Eileen was Shania Twain's real name. She was happy to hear that. Guess what suggested name came up for Seena? Shania. Seena died of sids at six months, & our families only pics of her are of me & her laying side by side on a bed. Each time I see those pics I feel lucky to be here. Blessings all.
     
  7. MsAmazo

    MsAmazo Member

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    longest, saddest, sweetest post i've ever read. thanks for sharing. how is she today?
     
  8. BlackGuardXIII

    BlackGuardXIII fera festiva

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    She is in a rehab clinic about 50 miles from me, waiting for me to get my butt down there, so I can't say a lot. She can say 10 word sentences, can feed herself, doesn't need depends anymore, wheels herself around in her wheelchair and is practicing going up and down stairs. And she still loves me dearly, and we still plan to get married. It has been 7 months 5 days. She is my hero.

    Thank you for your interest, Ken
     
  9. BlackGuardXIII

    BlackGuardXIII fera festiva

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    I am off now, so I will be away all day. Black was Eileen's favorite colour to wear.
    I like it for its symbolism of infinity, formality, authority, and divinity. And I like the meaning of blackguard. 1101 in binary or C in hex (XIII)is just a reoccuring number that I like.
    Let me know what you think of my tale, if you would.

    Ken
     
  10. BlackGuardXIII

    BlackGuardXIII fera festiva

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  11. DancerAnnie

    DancerAnnie Resident Beach Bum

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    How can I follow BlackGuard's post...

    I can't, but I will...

    I met a guy, not long after my mom passed away in 2000, on the internet. I remember IMing him in a chat room and as soon as he began to talk to me, I started crying. It wasn't something he said that made me cry, it was just the emotions I felt at the time. It almost freaked me out when he told me he was crying, when I hadn't told him I was. We exchanged phone numbers and talked on the phone every night for about six months. He lived two hours away and since I was still in H.S., my dad wouldn't let me drive out there and Seth didn't have a car, so he couldn't drive here. I met someone else after about six months. It was never meant to be that way, but things happened and the longing to be with someone started creeping up on me. I gave in and started dating the other guy. Seth and I still talked, but after awhile, it got complicated and I just stopped talking to him. In 2001, I graduated from H.S. and moved in with that guy. But I still thought about Seth. All the time, wondering what he was doing with his life, how he was. His number was disconnected and I lost his email address, so I could never contact him. He was still held a large part of my heart, though. I really loved him. In 2002, while sitting in a college computer lab, I entered the same chat room and lo hand behold, there was Seth's screenname. We picked up where we left off and a month later, I finally was able to go out to his home and meet him. It was like I was meeting an old friend. Everything was so familiar...it was as if the time between us was never lost. Eventually, I moved in with Seth. I couldn't be away from him. The feelings I had were so wonderful. Everything felt so right, it was unreal. It was fairytale stuff. But as time passed we knew we were never meant to be together in that way. We were like brother and sister. We kissed, but never were intimate. THAT never felt right. I moved out, yes, it was sad to know that my soulmate never was meant to be my significant other, but I knew Seth would make someone else really happy. It's 2004 and we are still best friends. We finish eachother's sentences. He's more like my big brother than an ex. He's met most of the guy's I have dated since him. We may not talk for a couple of weeks, but it's strange to get a phone call when I'm having a bad day and he says: "I thought you might need to talk". It's like he knows what I feel and I always know how he's feeling. He's truely my best friend. After all that, we still love eachother. I can honestly say, I've never had a connection with anyone else like I have with him. Not even my closest family members.

    A soulmate isn't necessarily a boyfriend or husband, it's someone you have a lasting connection with...who knows you like no one else. Who comforts you when you don't ask for it...who just KNOWS you. It's hard to explain, but you know it when you feel it.
     
  12. gmdukes

    gmdukes Banned

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    i met my soulmate and we live together and its awesome. shes the best!
     
  13. DoktorAtomik

    DoktorAtomik Closed For Business

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    Let's not forget the world's happiest couple......

    [​IMG]
     
  14. My_Euphoric_Veils

    My_Euphoric_Veils Member

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    OMG you are so fucking fortunate :(
     
  15. DoktorAtomik

    DoktorAtomik Closed For Business

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    Yeah, I make a point of reminding myself of that every day! Took me years to get where I am though, and I had my share of terrible relationships. In fact, right before I met my partner, I was just coming out of a really horrible relationship that'd been two years of hell. If anyone had asked me at that time if I believed in soulmates, I'd have said "no way!". In fact, at that point in time I doubted it was even possible to find someone you had a lot in common with! Funny how things change.
     
  16. gmdukes

    gmdukes Banned

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    me and my girl are still young, but we definitley know that we are in true love. it is so awesome we cant imagine not spending every moment of time we have after work alone. we love eah other so much it is the best feeling in the world, we are so lucky because we are so unique and never thought that we would ever find our soulmates after so many unsuccessful trys, but we are really soulmates and it is beautiful.
     
  17. My_Euphoric_Veils

    My_Euphoric_Veils Member

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    Well i`d had a relationship with everything in common. after two years though, it ended.
    Then fell inlove with someone else, what a big mistake - i`m going to be heart-broken ..again.
    And then there is ..someone ...
     
  18. forest_pixie84

    forest_pixie84 Senior Member

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  19. Bug_Man

    Bug_Man Banned

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  20. forest_pixie84

    forest_pixie84 Senior Member

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    its nice to know that your trying to think

    have an uneventful tedious day
     

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