Are People Turned Off By Strong Women

I'd like to add something:
Although I'm opinionated, and strong about it --- Maybe I am the only one, but I have a feeling I'm not...that when I state my opinions or stand up for myself, it seems if someone calls me a bitch, or something to that effect, I immediately feel bad and my thoughts race like... "Oh shit, did I really hurt or offend someone? Should I apologize? Should I explain" ---although I usually disregard these thoughts...because I've learned that they get in the way of being happy, they still remain...and I wonder if it's just a woman's nature to feel bad like that---or if it's just me.

I learned to disregard these thoughts, unless I know that I really may HAVE been a bit rude about something, because it seems that everytime I have caved and either apologized, or whatever it is that I have done to make it "better" that later the same person will take advantage of me and my opinion...or try to make me feel bad again... you know what I'm saying?

I've mostly had that with guys, but girls too...mainly girls in high school that were "bullies" --- Just like with one of my ex-boyfriends, if he would do something that hurt my feelings, and I'd tell him or I'd do what III wanted to rather than cater to him, then he would make me feel bad about it in some way, shape, or form and I'd immediately apologize, taking the fault, making it up to him...etc. And then worse and worse situations would occur and he seemed to almost EXPECT me to not say anything about it at all -- When I finally got sick and tired of his shenannigans [sp?] and broke up with him, he seemed honestly SUPRISED... like he never expected me to finally stand up for myself.

That's the last time I let shit go when something truly hurt/irritated me--- ever since then I haven't.

However, now with my current boyfriend I don't back down so much as that I seem to nurture him much more than I ask of him and at times it gets a little irritating that he expects so much of that out of me, but wants to give none in return--or it's a chore when I ask for something. I don't expect it to be like a game, with a point system but I expect things to be a little more equal than it is--- so lately I sort of have been backing off with the constant "nurturing" if I dont feel like I'm getting the affection and love from him in return.
Because he knows and respects that I'm strong, for the most part, he's understanding about this whole situation and... I must say it's really nice to have a guy like that

 

men are turned off and intimidated by women who are more mature than them. they can't handle the fact that they aren't in control of their lives as the woman is.

 

People like being around week people because they're easy to control and force opinions on.

But it kinda annoys me when people mistake opinionated for strong and get offended when others disagree with them or find them disagreeable to be around.

 

I'm not bothered by a strong independant woman, I'm not even bothered by a somewhat arrogant woman,


I am bothered by women with very weak will who won't stand for what they believe in, who avoid a fight because it's just "easier"......

someone who is willing to yell for what they believe in, to stand before the approaching force and deny it, to conquer her foes...

someone I can have a good shouting match with and no one will walk away with hurt feelings

 

I get hurt by shouting matches. Does that make me week?

The fact that you are attracted to women that you can yell at is slightly disturbing. It seems that what you're saying is that you hurt people, but you don't want to, so you're attracted by women who are hard to hurt. But people get hurt sometimes and are too "strong" to show it.

 

No, of course not. There is nothing wrong with being hurt by shouting.

Some people DO seem to communicate by shouting. My dh and are unfortunately two of these people. I don't mind shouting, as long as insults are not hurled. Being loud is one thing, being abusive verbally is an other.

But if you don't like shouting, I think that is admirable. I think not shouting is probably a better way to communicate. I'm Italian and Irish, my husband is Eastern European. We tend to be loud. I'd actually like it quieter. He actually gets louder if I remain quiet. (Says I am treating him lik a child. By not yelling?) Go figure.

But I don't think communicating by yelling or shouting makes people "Strong." People who can be strong, and remain quite are more impressive, IMO.

 

I agree with those who said people are intimidated because they are more mature... and that people tend to feel more comfortable being around weaker, more passive people because they are easy to persuade and control---

Being a strong woman, I like strong guys... I dont mean physically either. I like it when my boyfriend can stand up for myself or tell me if I did something that irritated him... when I ask him if theres anything that irritates him about me, and he says "No" or "I dont know" i get a little frustrated because EVERYONE has their little pet peeves about someone--- but when he stands up and says... "well...it really bothers me when..." I thrive off that, I like knowing what I'm doing wrong and if I can fix it and how, and I like knowing that he can stand up to me instead of just being pushed around.

 

Exactly the qualities I appreicate in a strong woman. with my size and Texas bred street persona it's hard to even find a man who will tell me when I'm fucking up. A strong woman can do that without making it a macho event of some kind.

 

No thanks




Yes please

 

Strong willed women are fine just as long as they are in balance. Like the yin and yang thing.


Strong willed and opinionated without openmindedness, selflessness and willingness to compromize SUCKS!

I once dated a girl who initially attracted me with her "strong will" but after about a year of finding out that she was just selfish, concieted and basically a brat, I couln't put up with her anymore. I think a lot of it stemmed from the fact that she was an only child greatly coddled and spoiled by her parents giving her their undivided attention and treating her as their little princess. I think she never learned compromize in the way that siblings must. I'm not dogging only children (my dad was an only child and is damn cool). I'm just saying that this girls "strong personality" was just "I'm a little princess" in disguise brought on much by the way she was raised.

In fact, I used to get frowned upon by her parents if I didn't let her win at card games and board games and such. Her mom even through a fit and yelled at me once for not letter her win during a personal winning streak at a card game after the 20 year old "girlfriend" ran to her room pouting!!!

 

The word here being 'woman', a person of female gender of maturity and balance. I sounds to me like you were dating a 'girl' not a woman bro. Better luck next tme!

 

Yeah, no kidding!!! It was about 8 years ago so just one of those learning experiences!

 

Win

 

i've never been a shouter, i don't fight. i simply don't even discuss something until both parties are able to settle down and be reasonable. naturally this includes myself. i come from a family that screams everything at each other and i found it totally unproductive. a lot of times people will think that i'm being weak by not yelling at someone, which is bizarre to me. my strength lies in my inability to be moved to do something i find inappropriate. i have a husband who's extremly dominant, but he'll be the first to tell you that he's never yet been able to move me when i don't want to be moved or change me in any way. he says it's like trying to sculpt a soap bubble. in all the screaming that my family does, they'll also acknowledge that i'm so grounded that shouts, screams and intimidation just roll over me like water. i have no respect for shouts and rages. i'm totally unimpressed.

 

hell yeah --- I fucking love that woman.

 

What a litte brat. You were smart to get out. She wasn't strong, she was spoiled!

 

Me too.. I was desperatly trying too get my point across through words..could not do it, so i thought pictures would do the trick...

 

1. thank you, There is a difference between yelling at someone and going for the throat, one can yell at someone without trying to hurt them or one can completly emotionally cripple someone in 15 minutes

2. when I really want to hurt someone there is no yelling involved, and it is usually succint

3. it's spelled weak damnit..... that is just so effing annoying, I'm sorry, just tweaking me that you're talking about seven days here....

4. loud people have more fun..... us and blondes..... (the last one is completly a joke, if you don't think it's funny, well then, I'm sorry)

 

if their too buff then yes

 

I thought the last one was funny

And I agree 100%