Ask a silly question ... get a silly answer

God yes! They get you admiring looks when you take them for a walk!

How do you eat a sausage roll?

 

I bite it ! , stop calling me roll

how many ten pences have you lost down the couch ?

 

A lot more than I've found.

Why do I have to sleep?

 

You dont, why do you?

Do you have a fad?

 

No its a Volkswagen

Where were you first kissed ?

 

on the mouth.

why is glass clear if it comes from sand which is not?

 

Its fish poo sand, and the brown is washed out of it, or it wouldnt make glass...

Why do fish poo so much sand?

 

Coz using a toilet roll isn't easy under water-sand just abrades without the need to wipe.


How come both my dogs AND one cat want to sleep on my bed?

 

They feel safe sleeping with a bear.

How come the rain dosnt come out of the clouds as soon as it gets in them?

 

Where would be the fun in that? Likes to keep you guessing..

How come next doors cat likes to poop in MY garden?

 

Because the next door neighbors' garden is all full.

Why does the sun shine on days I'm trying to sleep in?

 

Cos you didn't leave your order with the concierge the night before.


Why is a foot three times as high as a hand?

 

it is only if your standing on your head.

why are my hands bigger when im stoned?

 

Cos they get bruised and swollen.


How do you smoke a dovetail joint?

 

With firewood

what does the pot call the kettle ?

 

Mrs. Kettle.

Why do we have names?

 

Because there aren't enough numbers to go round.


Why do standard lamps come in so many different individual designs?

 

Because people arent blind.

Why do people collect things?

 

See something they like, then it becomes an adiction..then they just dont want anyone else to have them.


Does red always mean danger or stop?

 

Not when it comes to red apples.

Does green always mean safe or go?