Ask a stupid question get a stupid answer

cos they've never seen the beauty in a copper ring

why are material things so important to people ?

 

We would be immaterial then.

How come aliens haven't officially made theirselves known to us?

 

Which 'us' are you referring to,Earthman?



How come rolling tobacco isn't sold in cylinders?

 

Because the amount of propellant needed to get it to squirt out properly would make a right mess of the ozone layer.


Why don't more people eat jellied eels?

(Tubby Isaacs here I come ... YUM!!!)

 

Have you seen the price of jelly??



How can we be sure the earth isn't upside-down?

 

Because if it was, we'd all be talking with an Australian accent ... and I don't hear many of them in East Anglia (except in Ipswich, of course. A broad Ipswich accent is very similar to an Australian accent. I think probably they transported rather a lot of folk from Ipswich in the early days of Australia ...)

Why can't you make bricks without straw?

 

Coz House-Martens need something to nest in.




Why is 'knickers' plural but 'bra' singular?????

 

Because the words were invented by men, I imagine.

Why do we have to have Greenwich Mean Time? Why can't we have Greenwich Kind Time instead??

 

Coz it would sound stupid to say "Kindwhile,back at the Bat-Cave..."


Why don't we move all the sand inland so we can sit on the beach without getting shit on by seagulls?

 

Because the beach is only fun when the sand is wet.

Why isn't Wells-next-the-Sea next the sea?

(And the same question re Cley-next-the-sea, too:mickey

 

cos the sea evaporated in the sun

why are'nt rainbows called colourbows ?

 

coz you can bet SOMEONE would ask what colour is a Colourbow!



How come this bar of TURKISH Delight I'm eating says 'made in England'???????

 

An unknown Briton reputedly became very fond of the delicacy during his travels to Istanbul and purchased cases of it, to be shipped back to Britain under the name Turkish delight. It became a major delicacy in Britain and throughout Continental Europe for the high class society. During this time, it became a practice among upperclass socialites to exchange pieces of Turkish delight wrapped in silk handkerchiefs as presents.



why am i a forum addict?

 

Because your pusher was all out of the hard stuff.


What do rocket scientists say instead of "it's not exactly rocket science"?

 

cos its not exactly rocket science

why do people trust brain surgeons with shaky hands ?

 

they don't-that's they're put to sleep 1st...after 6 goes trying to find the vein with the hypodermic!




what does patting your head while rubbing your tummy actually achieve?

 

the answer is actually not too stupid

 

An enduring sense of satisfaction mingled with bewilderment as to why you just did it.


Why are horseshoes supposed to be lucky?

 

Well have you ever seen a horse hit by a car while bending down to tie it's laces?

NO??

Well,THAT'S lucky,ain't it?





Just how bored do you have to be to invent the staple?

 

Not half as bored as you have to be to invent the post-it note

(actually ... that was an accidental discovery. A batch of glue that wasn't made up right and would never totally set ... and some whizz kid realised there was actually a use for it ...)


Why do we choose red for stop and green for go on traffic lights ... when the most common colour blindness is red / green???