Ask a stupid question get a stupid answer

ice surfing was getting boring

do you put ice cream in the micro wave?

 

Yeah ... sure. Just be sure not to plug the thing in while it's got ice cream in it, OK?


Howcome freckles are considered cute, but zits aren't?

 

Most people don't like the contour and the white center.

What do you think about his Wife Vagina ?

 

I try not too.

Have you ever met a real live Wookie?

 

Yes down the street, it was very small, his name was Chewy

My dog needs a g/f what should I do?

 

Go to Bitches-R-Us

What would you be doing if you weren't here right now?

 

Something else.

What aren't you doing in order to be here right now??

 

Going to the grocery store.

Do I have a milk addiction?

 

Are you a milk hoarder? Do you have a couple of slave guernseys? These could be signs.

Whats the best way to get to San Jose?

 

The best way?--travel there-it works every time!



Am I the only one?-Is it REALLY just me?

 

Of course you're the only one. But we're working on the cloning technology to produce an anti-you, and then you won't even be that.

What numpty called the hills of southern England "downs", when anybody can see that they're actually "ups"??

 

Jim Morrison. He's been down so long that it looks like up to him.

Cream in your coffee?

 

Nah..Doppio espresso con un hazelnut,mille grazie.


How come the naughty step is so crowded?

 

Because good is nice but naughty is nicer

why are the primary colours red blue and green for light, but red blue and yellow for pigments???

 

lack of chairs

what colour is yellow ?

 

Sort of like butter ... with attitude


If bootmakers make boots, why don't bookmakers make books?

 

For the same reason postmen deliver post,milkmen deliver milk...but dustmen TAKE your 'dust'. See?


How come Brits use braces to hold their trousers up,but Murcans use them to straighten teeth?

 

cos bookmakers really wanted to be bootmakers

is'nt fey a great gift ?

 

Tina Fey doesn't even know I exist.

Why do kids buy their dads ties for fathers day?

 

Because it would be a dumb gift to give them for mothers' day.

How long is a piece of string?