carry on a conversation using only movie quotes...

Don't you "In a minute, Momma" me! Get off your fat little ass or I'll break it for you! I want two soft boiled eggs, white toast, and some of that grape jelly god damn it! And don't burn the toast!

 

Don't you think you put enough wine in that spaghetti?

 

To become a member of a crew you've got to be one hundred per cent Italian so they can trace all your relatives back to the old country. See, it's the highest honor they can give you. It means you belong to a family and crew. It means that nobody can fuck around with you. It also means you could fuck around with anybody just as long as they aren't also a member.

 

Am I not turtley enough for the turtle club. Turtle, turtle, turtle!

 

You are here because the outside world rejects you. THIS is your family. *I* am your father. I want you all to become full members of the Foot. There is a new enemy: freaks of nature who interfere with our business. You are my eyes and ears; find them. Together we will punish these creatures. These... Turtles.

 

Oh, yeah, that's right. That's what's it's all about, all right. But talkin' about it and bein' it, that's two different things. I mean, it's real hard to be free when you are bought and sold in the marketplace. Of course, don't ever tell anybody that they're not free, 'cause then they're gonna get real busy killin' and maimin' to prove to you that they are. Oh, yeah, they're gonna talk to you, and talk to you, and talk to you about individual freedom. But they see a free individual, it's gonna scare 'em.

 

They will see free men and freedom! By the strength of our backs, and the sweat of our brows, and the courage of our hearts - gentlemen, hoist the colours.

 

There is so much in this world that I do not understand. See that machine? It has something to do with recycling our water supply. I have absolutely no idea how it works. But I do understand the reason for it to work. I have absolutely no idea how you are able to do some of the things you do, but I believe there's a reason for that as well. I only hope we understand that reason before it's too late.

 

I want rustlers, cutthroats, murders, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con-men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglars, horse thieves, bull-dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, ass-kickers, sh**-kickers, and Methodists!

 

Well you've got a lot to be furious about, and I'll tell you why: You're not well-liked. You're uh, you're abrasive and off- putting. You try and say pithy things, but your wit is a hinderance and therefore nothing is provocative. Just mixed metaphors.

 

"Does whatever a spider-pig does"

 

I thought I thought you said you were alright, Spider

 

Bye-bye lard ass.

 

"Good morning, Vietnam!"

 

Saigon... shit; I'm still only in Saigon... Every time I think I'm gonna wake up back in the jungle. When I was home after my first tour, it was worse. I'd wake up and there'd be nothing. I hardly said a word to my wife, until I said "yes" to a divorce. When I was here, I wanted to be there; when I was there, all I could think of was getting back into the jungle. I'm here a week now... waiting for a mission... getting softer; every minute I stay in this room, I get weaker, and every minute Charlie squats in the bush, he gets stronger. Each time I looked around, the walls moved in a little tighter.

 

They told me there was nothing out there, nothing to fear. But the night my parents were murdered I caught a glimpse of something. I've looked for it ever since. I went around the world, searched in all the shadows. And there is something out there in the darkness, something terrifying, something that will not stop until it gets revenge... Me.

 

but...I dont know. there's just something about him. Something 'round the eyes. I dont know. Reminds me of.....me. No, I'm sure of it. I hate him.

 

I tell you. You are the greatest composer known to me.

 

You look like I need a drink.

 

It's okay. I'm a cop. Trust me, I've been doing this for eleven years.