i think i may try to do that, lola... i hadn't really thought about it until i started talking on here and few days ago and realized how much i wanted to talk about all this... and i really don't think i "need" any more of the healthcare at this point, just someone i can talk to. thanks!
Just keep working with those issues, it is just my personal opinion, but sometimes turning to God at a crisis situation helps alot. Maybe turn to buddhism and mindfulness meditation etc.
It's NORMAL at least. For me since I didn't know who the person was and they never got punished- trial, jail, etc- and I knew he was probably gonna do it again and had probably dont it before- yes, I felt it was so unfair that he could DO THAT and just..NOTHING happen to him. I freaked out a few times crying, in such rage and I wanted to kill him. Honestly, I would have been okay with an apology or justice.
Sister, I felt exactly how you feel! I was raped when I was 13. I didn't tell anyone until I was 17! I sould have told someone, but I was so scared and I didn't know how people would have reacted. The dude who did it to me disappeared off the face of the earth. To this day I have no clue where he is. He could have died and I wouldn't even know. I wish I turned his ass in, but I didn't and I'm sure his karma is pretty bad. I'm a firm believe that these types of guys don't just do this once. They harm any women. This is why I'm mad at myself for not turning his ass in. Once I got out of my four year depression I used my hateful energies towards guys like this into teaching girls and women on how to protect themselves. I also stress the importance in reporting the person who sexually assaults to the police because he or she could hurt many other people. This is my suggestion, how about you direct this energy into helping other women who went through similar situations like you or education women on how to prevent these types of events? It will make you feel so much better knowing that you could possibally help prevent the same thing that happened to you to other women.