Im glad you posted this. I have been driving myself fucking crazy trying to figure out what is wrong with ME, but today, after some thinking and communication with others, I realize the problem, it is not me, it is my setting, and a little group of people who try to represent something bright, when in reality, they are dark, dark, people.
Us psychonauts are different than society, I have givin up on trying to help most people that I know, it's like dragging a dead dog around. I am sorry to say that I have givin up on ppl I have known for a long time, but no matter what you say or do.. In the end they do what they want and don't even consider your views on what could make their life better. They are living in a delusion through their whole life. It is when you can reflect on your life and make decisions that guide you on the right path that makes you a bright person. Don't let them bring you down, surround yourself with people who are happy and bright as you are. And if there are none, spend more time with your woman. When you find the right woman, you will become a 2 man army and you wont need anyone else. She is the one, or vis versa for the women who find the right man. But from what you have told me about your love, it will last forever. Keep it strong, and being around the negative friends and setting will not help. It will guide you in the wrong direction in life if you are not strong. But I have a great amount of faith in you. <3
I am taking full responsibility of my feelings by choosing to no longer associate with those who think they can buy friendship with drugs. When the drugs are gone, what is there? You dont wanna know. Im good, I have been taking care of the little things, and have just realized the big thing. Well, I have known it all along, I have just been lying to myself. And thats what leads to delusion. I was mislead by many things, and that is all my fault completely. I didnt trust my feelings, or myself, and I rationalized the shit out of so many things. Im good now though, the answer I was looking for was there alllll along, just had to poke around a bit.
I can't be responsible for the way I feel b/cause I do not feel comfortable around certain people. I feel that way for a good reason.. Granted I have excluded alot of ppl out of my life for that reason. But I agree to keep your friends close and your enemies closer. There are advantages, and disadvantages...
Don't fault yourself for anything. We all end up in situations we don't want/need to be in, but as long as we learn from it, then it ends up being a good thing. You seem to know what you need to do differently now, so be thankful that you went through the storm and learned what you needed to learn, because without the storm, you may never have seen the light
Life is good, but it is still difficult, and that's how it should be. Otherwise, you never learn anything, and that is bad. lol But yeah..."life's shit bombs" is nice. haha
i painted a series of abstract paintings called "shit to bliss"...about the daily bullshit we have to endure for those rare moments of overwhelming love and connection. peace
