Do men repress rape instincts?

This whole argument transcends the most militant feminism and enters the realm of ugly bitterness. If someone actually cares about someone else, then they don't feel any urges to rape them... but I suppose a lot of it depends on how much respect there is in the relationship.

 

Thats awesome, finally a guy is telling the truth. Come on now, men always had that instinct but common sense and a conscious will stop those thoughts.

 

Yes, as a young boy i had fantisies of going up 2 random women and havin sex with them. I cant really explain what i was thinking, I was just a horny 13 yr old. I never have any of those fantasies anymore. I stoped thinking like that along timeago. i think it happened when i started having sexual experiences with girls my age, i started looking at girls in different ways. Not just one person receiving pleasure but the idea of the two people pleasureing eachother is somthing that gets me off now

 

If you take any person, be it man or woman, and change their environment drastically, what is "instinctual" will change. Ex; If you deprive an avid none hunter of food for long enough but leave a gun and field of deer for him to watch he will eventually kill his own food. People will do pretty much anything to survive, and procreation is a means of survival.

Basically what I am trying to say is that most men in todays society have no desire to rape, but if you made his environment extreme enough it becomes a possibilty.

 

Although most women would NOT want such an experience in reality, many of them have rape fantasies.

I've never really fantasized about raping someone, but I have fantasized about some forbidden act, such as someone's wife giving themselves up, naked for my cock, and ravaging them.

 

Sometimes it's hard not to assume that every other guy is a potential rapist. It is such a common crime. It happens so often and is carried out by the most normal of men. I don't think that all men secretly feel the desire to rape a woman (although, based on a couple of the responses here so far, I do worry) but I wonder how many can truly understand what the fear of such a thing feels like. I think that perhaps the men who work to stop rape and feel vehemently against it are fueled by anger that someone of their 'species' (so to speak) abused their power and hurt someone these guys feel like they're supposed to protect.

They obviously know it's wrong but by the way some serial rapists describe their actions, it's seen more comparable to robbery than something that will haunt a person forever, as though a quick apology will make it all better. Sometimes after I see a movie in which a rape occurs, I am completely turned off the idea of sex for a while - men are so lucky that sex can't be a scary experience for them... obviously there are men who were sexually abused as a child and that will stay with them for life but look who commits most of those crimes.

Would there be even more rapes if it wasn't for it being labeled as 'wrong'? Can the men who would never commit such an atrocity still sympathize with those who have? I am not a man-hater in the least but I do ponder a lot of things and since I am not a man, nor will I ever be one, I'm often curious of how the mindsets of both sexes differ. I am cautious when I am out and about, like everyone should be, but I think I can safely say that most of the men I know are not capable of rape. I think this is an interesting discussion and I hope no one's offended by it. It's up to us all to enlighten the rest as to what goes on inside the heads of regular people.

 

Great question, but I'm not sure it belongs in this thread.

And a rape fantacy is just that, a fantasy.
Sort of like asking straight guy if he ever had a gay fantacy and got off?
Again, just a fantacy.

 

I think you allways have to look at the two sides of the medal ! I dont want to support people who rape women and I personally would NEVER do it. But there are some girls that run around and talk and act and look like really prostitutes, butwhen you try to talk to them they just grin at you and show you their middlefinger ! And then leave you alone with a boner in your pants and even your balls hurt for the rest of the day when you think of them !!! Even in such a situation I would NOT rape a woman, but I think its easy to imagine why other people would !

 

I think you´re failing to differentiate between instinct and belief. You CAN´T control an instinct, the impulse I mean. But one can control one´s actions.

I´d say it´s instinctive for us (men AND women) to want sex. However, I believe it´s instinctive for a man to want to sleep with as many women as he can, to spread his seed. For a woman, it´s instinctive to look for a man with certain, desirable traits - what these are is debatable, and also to make herself look alluring to attract a man.

To answer the question, I have never, EVER felt the urge to rape. I think about sex all the time, every woman I meet I instantly assess. Some I find desirable and fantasise about, others not. But in a relationship ultimately, the woman´s the boss because her libido is lower than mine, and woman can seem to switch off their sex drive. Whilst with guys (certainly me) that´s impossible, but as I say I have never considered forcing myself - so I´m not sure it´s an instinct inherent in men.

 

Sounds to me as if you think of testosterone as something negative - if this is true, you should consider that testosterone is not only the thing that makes us fight, but also the thing that makes us THINK ! Bigger balls, bigger brains ! Without testosterone we might still all be sitting at the fire in some cave....

 

I'm sorry you feel this way but it's something I've thought about - how men get angry with women for 'teasing' them.

Well, we're sorry, but you have to remember that in a general sense men and women don't see sex in the exact same way simply because their bodies don't react to it in the same way. Women can get sexually frustrated after some time, but clearly not on the scale that some men do. If something leading up to sex is stopped in it's tracks, women are probably more able to bounce back whereas men, I hear, can actually find it painful.

So, in conclusion, I don't think most women mean to frustrate you and even if she did because it made her feel good, no woman is asking to be raped. So please try to remember that perspective makes all the difference and that men and women may not realize the motives of one another or what is running through the other's mind. It is just sad when one party has to pay the price for not knowing.

 

Well, you heard right.... And in my opinion its not some sort of misunderstanding on the part of the girls, they just WANT to be evil (NOT speaking about you !)

 

Not all women who are raped HAD IT COMING , or TEASED ....some were honestly RAPED and had no choice in the matter..I am pleased to hear you say you wouldnt do such a thing MR. GERMANLOVEMACHINE..

 

When talking about teasing I wasnt refering to you or any other woman on the forum, sorry if you understood it that way, and I do know that are woman that are raped without provoking their attacker in any way. But I know from my own experience that there definitely ARE women out there that act exactly as I described !

 

Its cool, germanlovemachine, I knew you werent speaking about me..and I am sorry if you have run accross such ladies..but there are verry good ones in the world also...
find one of them

 

I DO know that there are good ones... Id even say most girls from the school where I went, although there were a few of the other sort there as well.... One girl who is studying Physics together with me... Unfortunately, beeing "good" offers no evolutionary advantage, so as a man you are attracted to bitches that show off their thongs and whoppers at every opportunity, even if you know very well that they have the character of a lavatory and the IQ of a housefly.... What Im gonna do about it, piss on Mr. Charles Darwins grave ?

 

NO woman 'has it coming' no matter what she does, but sure, there are some who are nasty people and want to hurt others.
Women want to be desired. I'm trying to be a psychologist here, but I think it may make them feel like they have some kind of power. Men have physical power so women may want to feel like they have some kind of emotional control in order to balance the scales with men. That's why, if you look at all these new music videos and ads, the men are talking and singing about having lots of women while the women are talking and singing about being desirable. Sometimes wanting to be wanted backfires, though.
It's just a theory.

 

i didn't read throught the whole thing, but i've talked about this before in true confessions

i knew it, that i wasn't the only one (note that the thread is in my past and so are most of the thoughts)

see it seems only logical that men have thoughts like that maybe some women to

i stated before that all men have those thoughts it is just a matter of self control, to whether or not anything happens

but to answer your question, i have been plaugued by those thoughts and i have repressed them, if you're interested what other thought about it go to true confessions(it should be in the top ten for most post/views), because there was a time when it was very close to my heart

 

By all means, tell the truth. But you're scaring me...

 

i don't really see what that scary, we all have inpulses that we ignore every day

people think of murder, theif, and rarely act on it. Knowing what other are thinking could be kind of unnerving, but the struggle goes on day by day, even if they choose not to acknowledge it