Does it make you mad?

I do that a lot. It's really my only healthy coping skill It's not always without them knowing abotu it though, as it's hard with what I have to offer.

 

That's ok too. Just so long as your heart is in the right place.

 

marijuana is a depressant
that's the way it's classified and for a reason

i find when i'm exercising and tanning i get happy
vitamin d is created by the sun/uv rays that hit your skin when you eat dark green vegetables
and vitamin d creates dopamine in your brain, a natural high

info on vitamin d found here> http://www.oralchelation.com/ingred/VitaminD1.htm

there's lots of other vitamin deficiencies that cause/worsen depression

 

Good point.

 

Not fake it till you make it exactly. Just don't allow thoughts of negative things from the past to defile your mind. Pay attention to when this happens, and when it does, think of something good, or better yet, nothing at all.

You don't have to enjoy everything you do, but it makes things better. If you are completely unable to enjoy something, at least try to find things you do like about it.

I don't know if I'd say that, but from my own experience, I have always achieved far more when I haven't been smoking. If you want to accomplish something, it probably won't hurt to lay off the herb for a while, and once you've reached some goals, light up if you feel like it.

 

because you are sometimes very unhappy with and disappointed in yourself. your standards for yourself are unrealistic yet you hate on yourself when you can't achieve them. you've gotta realize that you (and everyone) are imperfect and hypocritical but your life is a journey to embrace your nature and become a good and true person.

and I think "fake it till you make it" is the exact opposite of what you should do. faking is dishonest with yourself and others. strive for what you want honestly and you will achieve it.

meditate, read, listen to music, paint, write, garden, cook, bathe, dance, go on long, long walks and explore new places. I like walking somewhere fun, even if it's just the grocery store. I love walking or biking to the grocery store. I have to be really picky about what I buy or I won't be able to carry it all back.

YES. if you are using a drug on a regular basis and you are using it to mask problems you are having, you are essentially dependent on that drug for happiness and a sense of well-being instead of searching within for that feeling. weed is medicine and shouldn't be taken more than a couple times a month. my life turned around when I started cutting back on weed. no more meltdowns. for the first time in my life I can say that I am not depressed. I suffered from chronic depression from as early as I can remember. When you cut back on weed, you learn to fill those painful places with joyful, beautiful, nostalgic things instead of leaving them empty and smoking weed to fill them, if that makes sense.

fish oil, saint john's wort, vitamins D and E, gingko biloba, fruit, peppers, dark chocolate.

 

something else that is so important: pay attention to how you talk to yourself. REALLY pay attention to the way you treat yourself. you may realize that you are being really mean to yourself. I know I fall into that rut. Positive self-talk is one of the most important things in building and maintaining a positive mental outlook. You gotta catch yourself being negative and cruel to yourself and change the way you treat yourself. It's little things, I used to have a bad habit of looking at myself from bad angles in the mirror for example, later I realized it was part of an eating disorder and I had to change the way I looked at myself. It's a constant struggle but you just keep on trucking, lifting yourself higher and higher so that happiness isn't so far away.

 

I get mad but I realize I did it to myself and I promise myself I'd never do it again. The past makes you stronger even with no support.

 

Zilla, I like the way you think. :cheers2:

 

:cheers2:

 

THANK YOU. I got some really good advice in this thread.
I'm going to do the following this Sunday when we go to Tahoe:
get fish oil, get vitamin D
This when we move:
add more sun in (it's too dusty and hot and weird here to go outside, unless you drive to Tahoe), go to the gym at least every other day to get things moving

The pot, it's just hard because of the naseau and damage from the stomache ulcers. I am goign to talk to the dispensary next time and see what I can do. What the doctor perscribed for when I can;t smoke pot, knocks me on my ass and leaves me unfunctional. I wish I could trade it for some pot lol.

I don't know what to do about that.

 

well pot is probably better than any other prescription... it sucks you have to be dependent on it

 

That's what my husband and mom both say my problem is. You've been VERY, EXCEPTIONALY helpfula nd I really appreciate it. I am goign to come back to this thread in a few weeks and let you know how the vitamin D and fish oil is working and later how the more substantial improvements are working.
You hit the nail on the head with beign mean to myself. Sometimes I say horrible things to myself. I'm too embarassed to type them, but they can get pretty bad.

 

There are times when if I could kill the perverted bastard that caused my trauma (and therefore years of suffering not just for me, but for others too, not to mention the other victims) I would. I happily honestly would

Thankfully those times are rare now and I try and see that what happened, did, and Ive got to either take some good from it and not let myself get so negative or let evil nasty shit win. A lot easier said than done of course, but Im working on it

Getting out and staying healthy and active really do help

 

I'm on Celexa (on anti-anxiety med) as well. I'm tappering off though. I was on four meds after I started gettign treatment for what happened, so it's been a lot of work getting off of all of those this past year. A lot of weirdnes tryign to get my brain back to normal.
I should have gotten checked in somewhere after what happened happened and dealt with it all right away. I shouldn;t have dated for awhile. shouldn't have shouldn;t have shouldn;t have.
Okay, i am now gettign a grip.

 

I hate being dependent on it. Most of all, I hate spending the $$$ on it. I spend on it what some people pay for rent.
The husband doesn't want me to quit. I am sure if I decided I 100 percent wanted to wuit, he would support me, but I think he sees my stomache problems and moods and wants me to feel good and be happy.
But it's so much money, I would think that no matter how much we made and I do hate being dependent on it.