Girls - be honest. Men want to know this.

c'mon, laugh a little. i'll tickle you if you find that it helps.

 

umm... the only thing I've ever done is "be there for me"

which meant, please be able to hold me while I cry over rape issues and friends and stuff. Yes, he walked out while tears were rolling down my face... most men aren't that stupid.

 

most aren't. jeez. what an asshole.

 

Because if she looks "hot", she can assume her ass doesn't look huge in those pants. You may not have fashion sense, but most men who claim not to know these things can still tell if something makes a person considerably more or less attractive.

Of course, you're showing some of your other deep-seated issues there, assuming that she's looking to "go be hot with someone else" rather than simply wanting to look good for herself (boost her confidence a bit, how horrible).

 

You know why Iron-Goths are extinct today and only one survives, that too on a hipforum?

 

so why did you say girls instead of a women and men instead of boys in your title irongoth?

i think the other "girls" covered your questions pretty well... but i'll give my two cents too.

i too want to know if i look good in an outfit, an honest opinion, if i'm feeling pretty hot i want a compliment, or if i'm feeling kinda fat and ugly i want him to tell me to change or reassure me that i do infact look good... but i usually don't ask a bf how an outfit looks unless i'm going out with HIM.

lying in bed at night is often the time i go through the day in my head, and sometimes i have to talk out loud about it, whether it's too myself or my hunny. (haha, i don't usually speak out loud to myself....) i also get kinda romantic when i'm sleepy so i get kissy and stuff too. i don't think he has a problem with it... if he does he's realllllly good at hiding it, but he does the same thing, and i'm often the one sleeping while he's up doing something.

i don't know about everybody else but i get told ALL THE FUCKING TIME that ppl should not try to change another person... so those little habits you speak of that women all of a sudden can't stand and want gone once they're married... i don't really have an answer for that. maybe some ppl do think that men can be molded into who they want them to be... and i have seen many ppl change after being in a relationship, whether for better or worse.

 

look good for herself? that's like a tree falling in the woods w/ no one to hear it. if no one appreciates it, who cares? women don't want to look good for themselves, the wanna look good to other people.

 

...the Pats?
I WANNA DIVORCE!
(Not that my team is any better)
What? Just football?
My whodunits? Yah better stfu!...and why does the phone always ring when I'm watching 'em (my bf calling)
~pfft~
You remind me there is a good side to living alone. Ty!
ps. if I ask my guy its because he does have good taste and his opinion is the only one that matters. As for me, if its comfy it works. I'm wearing three different plaid flannels (two shirts and pants) as I speak.

 

Well, people who are married take on each others personalities. They both go torward each other and meet in the middle, sync up from spending so much time together.

People who have been married for 50 years are just like each other, I mean they've had the same dinners and shared the same thoughts for so long. This is not true in undeveloped or failing marriages.

So whenever you get married you wont have to change the person or be like "I don't like this about you and you need to change", because if its something you really disagree with you'll tell them your thoughts on it (before mindlessly dissent) and they'll tell you their thoughts and your opinions on it will change to mach each others, or you'll just have to accept that you can't agree on some stupid little detail and live with it. Bad marriages are when people can't agree on stupid little things. I mean I don't ever see myself fighting with somebody over something stupid.






Theres a lot of stupid generalizations being made in this thread.

 

another reason why I HATE being the receptor of gifts. This one bf buys me lingerie (that I didn't ask for) and doesn't even bother looking at the tag, just eyeballed it for size, well surprise, even large size lingerie looks small. He picked up 3 large lingerie and I'm a size small so they're unflatteringly drooping on me, he didn't even save the receipt (he probly shoplifted them). He bought me other clothes without me being there during his shopping expeditions so I had no input. He bought me the most gaudy junk, ill-suited for my body type and say to me "why don't you ever wear the clothes I bought for you".

If you MUST buy me a gift make it a loaf of bread.

IG, you're making generalizations and women can make generalizations of men too ya know.

 

Replace "can" with "do".

 

RE: Why is it that men are so obsessed with murder shows and sporting events and beer?

Because we're inwired to kill. Remember the whole "we hunt, you gather" social contract we came up with in prehistory? We, being stronger, would do the whole kill other humans/kill predators/hunt food trip, and you'd do the whole feed children/watch them/gather trip? Murder shows involve trips like revenge, which is our equivalent of him proposing to her at the end of the chick flicks.... and death.

RE: Why can't men be honest about how we look without having a fucking seizure trying to be polite?

Here's the deal. We'll do that the moment you don't wig out about a comment about gaining a few pounds, and don't bring it up, repeatedly and often, especially when you want something. We learn REALLY quick that you don't use words to communicate but as bartering chips and weapons.

RE: If you don't like dealing with sizes and types and whatnot, don't get a gift that requires it.

Here honey, here's your power tool.

RE: And all these "vague terms" and "psychic knowledge about our innermost thoughts"? What the hell? You meet us, fall in love with us, and basically get engaged to us knowing FULL WELL about our likes and dislikes,

Do we?

We might know you like Wuthering Heights but only your gay friends can pick out the perfect tulle ribbon just like the one Catherine gave to Heathcliffe on p. 48...

 

lol. ig, seriously, that's your silliest post yet. yes, i hunt and love murder shows. though mobster shows leave me cold. dunno why. power tools and weapons are great gifts for the women in my family. i'm indifferent to clothing, because i have NO IDEA what's cool. but if my man lets me leave the house looking hideous, he's gonna hear about it. we're a team for god's sake. he asks me if he looks okay, he owes me the same backup. and in this relationship, dave's the sensitive, considerate one. he's taught me how to be more open and communicative, because he can't know how to treat me if i don't tell him what i need. it's all that AA and NA he went through.

and if dave ever gave me a ribbon, well, hell. what would i do with it?

and i'm not the only exception.

 

I don't do any of this shit.

However, my dh does start talking RIGHT as the best part of Most Haunted is going on, about some boring shit at his work, despite my asking him to wait until Derek is done being "possessed."

My dh does NOT go to sleep. He thinks ANY TIME I go to bed at the same time as he does, I must be looking for sex. Can we just SLEEP? He doesn't talk bills, he grabs my ass and does that "dick in the back" thing when I'm trying to sleep. We don't have to do it every day. Four or five times a week is fine.

I haven't worn a size Small in clothing since I was pregnant with my second child. Yet, he still buys clothes in a size small, and doesn't ever have a receipt (his parents didn't "beleive" in returning things) he gets upset and "hurt" when I don't wear the dress or sweater or pants that I couldn't squeeze into to save my life. And he says the same thing every time, "Since when aren't you a Small, you're so little." "Since MOON was born, in 1988, honey."

But, y'know what, he's HUMAN, those are some of his faults, and it doesn;t really matter because I LOVE him, and love forgives or doesn't really get all that upset in the first place.

We just had our 20th wedding anniversary. We wouldn't have lasted so long if shit like this kept me up nights (well except the dick in the back thing, that keeps me up..... )

 

Why are men obssesed with murder shows? I'm the one who watches them, the FBI Files, Forensic anthropologists, Dr G Medical Examiner ect. My dh thinks theses shows are "depressing." Of course, he thinks about anything other than Football, Basketball, Seinfeld and the Simpsons are depressing. Despite the fact that he goes into a 2 day funk when the Bears lose, and hasn't yet recovered from the Bears losing out on the Play Offs last week. That's depressing, IMO.

No, when the Bears are on I either:

• Take the kids to the Library, so he can watch in peace
• Go shopping, so he can watch in peace
• Go watch Murder Shows upstairs, so he can get some peace
• Go online, so he can watch in peace

The man deserves a quiet house during the game, if he wants it. It doesn't bother me at all.

I can sometimes get him interested in Serial Killer Shows but he goes off on a tangent on how what he'd do to a Serial Killer, in detail, if they got near me or the kids and gets kinda scary.....LOL.

Vive La Differance (probably spelled that wrong, I don't speak French.)

 

Again, I don't understand the point of this thread.

It appears as though IronGoth wishes to discuss his personal experiences with his wife and throw stones at our glass houses.

 

Tisk tisk.

 

Yeah, it's a common theme with a few dudes here.

Misunderstanding womyn, and then blaming them along with stereotyping ALL females as the same. *sigh*

As you saw, few of the womyn here act like the post described, which the OP probably doesn't believe. Either way, men and womyn are different. It doesn't make either bad.

 

iron goth, yer just silly sometimes...

i never have to ask my hubby how he thinks i look, cuz he always tells me what a 'hottie' i am. he's even teachin the baby to call me 'hot mama' - lol! anything he gets me as a gift is great, he gets me silly little toys all the time, like my stuffed duck with a sign that says 'you make me happy'. how could i not like that? and tires for the car - cuz he cares that i'm safe.

i guess we're just lucky we finally found each other. we are so alike in our likes that we get along great. we both spoil each other. i sure don't want him ever feelin like he needs anyone but me.

that whole 'be there for me' thing... that's just the little things (to me anyways). fer instance, just last night i had a fever so he sent me to bed, made dinner for the rugrats even though he had worked all day, and came & checked on me, brought me ice water, tucked me in. i feel so loved.

and what do i do for him? anything i can. i cook his favorite foods, watch nascar with him (boring!), let him watch law n order for hours on end, share the crossword puzzle instead of doing it all myself, massage his aches, give him pedicures so his feet are healthy. send him love emails. and lots of sex, even if i don't really feel up to it. course, once we get started i always feel better anyways it's the best cure for a headache i've found. all that blood pumpin around...

 

OK OK OK

Let me ask my final thing then.

What's with that weird stance young women do these days? Like, they underdress for the weather, and then they do that thing where they're leaning back and hunched forward, gripping their arms tight across their chests.

Are you cold, honey? PUT SOME MORE CLOTHES ON. Or gain some weight. Jesus.