Grieving Breastfeeding...

Don't worry about it, Holly. I know you are doing the best you can.

(((((((((Holly))))))))) You don't need crap like that, when you are already upset.

 

this is why so many people hear people asking for advice and don't bother to take the time to respond. repression of ideas, putdowns and negativity are not an appropriate response to people who are trying to help...in my opinion. good luck to you anyways.

 

I'm so sorry, Holly.



I know how much this meant to you. You're not a failure, you just give her what you can and it will be alright.

 

I'm really sorry ((((hugs))))
this is an awful feeling, but yeah, moire needs food and that's all that matters at this point. You really tried, hard. If you can still get it to work using what maggie suggested, then great, but if you can't, try not to stress about it. You're still getting the bonding from her suckling.
I thought the same way you do/did, about bfing being a "penacle to be reached and emulated" and it made me feel horrible when I finally called it quits. I was so ashamed, I didn't even want to feed her in public...I felt like some kind of second rate woman who couldn't even bring herself to properly feed her daughter, and therefore, a complete failure.
You're a great mama, don't ever think otherwise.
You will still build an awsome relationship with your daughter, regardless of not being able to bf her. Right now it seems like the end of the world, but in time, when there's so many other important things happening in both yours, brian's and moire's lives, it will gradually fade and you will feel better. At this point, don't think of yourself as being a failure because you were not able to bf, but think of yourself as a great mother becuase you chose the next healthiest thing for Moire when your first option wasn't able to work.
(((((hugs again))))
feel better, you have a little beauty there

 

hey, maggie, can you look up inositol in Hales? if hf'04 has had bad side effects from metformin, might be worth looking at some alternatives. i know you're very anti-complementary/alternative approaches, but sometimes it's worthwhile to try something different.

ps, linky to the biggest breastfeeding thread on a pcos board~lots of pcos specific breastfeeding info, including stuff about overcoming low supply. good luck!

 

Definitely keep up on the track you're on hunny! You're doing great. And if you're willing to try it, the glucophage really might do the trick, I've known many mommy's who it worked for! If you have a hard time getting a doc to prescribe it, like maggie said, try to find an enocrine gyn - a doc like this actually SPECIALIZES in conditions like PCOS - I ended up seeing a wonderful one in Oregon, and she was the first doc I had who really explained things well to me, while treating me like I wasn't a moron.
(((((((hugs, for you and Moire!)))))))) I know she loves her mommy and you're loving her!

 

Actually, I'm not. I have a homeopathic kit in my bedroom, we use herb for self limiting things which I know either POSITIVELY work, or I know will do no harm. I frequently suggest Fenugreek (cuz we KNOW, often, it works, but not ALL the time, for every womyn) and Probiotics, again, because there is much more than heresay and snake oil involved in this. Hell, I treat my own sinus infections with Saline, Rosemary and garlic. I am not "Anti-alternative." I just know science, and when it comes to someone's HEALTH, I want PROOF.

That being said, I looked in Hale (I keep in on my desk) brfore I responded to LOTF, there is not enough proven data, or statitically significant results on inositol for there to even have an entry in Hale's. I can swing by his site later, but my main concern is that Holly needs something we KNOW works, now. Newmamas have enough to worry about, without trying every thing under the sun, and worrying and wasting time. She said she that if supplements and vitamins worked, this problem would have been solved the first week. Fenugreek did not work for her (not uncommon, when used alone for PCOS) I know metformin has a high side effect profile, but in the majority of moms with PCOS it is conclusively proven to increase mik supply. My concern is also for Holly's ENTIRE health. PCOS can cause some serious health problems down the line and womyn who can take Metformin do a lot better in the long run. The insulin resistance is closely related to eventual diabetes, and womyn ON metformin have a much lower risk of all the nasties diabetes has in store for it's victims. THe "side effects" of diabetes, as well as obesity and the other problems untreated, or undertreated PCOS causes is usually worse than the side effects of Metformin.

But, I am also concerned that Holly has had side effects from the drug in the past. Some docs will put the mom on an antidepressant BEFORE the metformin, to help offset side effect, especially if she has a history of depression and anxiety or had side effect like that in the past on this drug. (WE know that Zoloft and Paxil do not enter the Milk Compartment, and that NONE gets to the baby, and that many womyn who do not have seizure disorders can safely take Welbutrin, as well as other antidxes.)

This is, diabetes HAS to be treated. You can't ignore it and you can't just play around with rumourous "treatments." This disease is a killer, one of the biggest killers in North America. (the reasons for that are for an other thread) so she does need treatment. A GOOD endocrinologist is the best person to see, as s/he will have alternatives, if metformin isn't a good drug for Holly. (Holly, we aren't talking about you like you aren't here. I just had to address it in the third person. We know you are here, and we ALL care about you so much.)

The good news is that metformin is NOT found in the plasma of infants of mothers who take it, it has a low oral availability, so, it is not going to effect the baby (accept that she may, if it works, get more milk.)

I'll go over to Hale's site for HCPs and see what I can find.

 

my friends bubba didn't breastfeed for the first four months but her mum kept her suckling in between bottles and four months in bubba rejects the bottle and gets the boosie going for her....keep it up because every situation is different and yours might just work out the way you would like. If you feed her and then comfort feed afterwards would that possibly keep things ticking along for you? I know there is the nipple confusion thing but rather than giving up on it altogether it may help keep things happening for both of you? Good luck with all the other more complicated stuff you are talking about here too!!

 

Yes, steph is right. Comfort nursing is still a good idea. (Holly, was the Lactaid device too much for you? I know some moms just get so stresed using it. I can still send you the Medela SNS, if you like, it is different than the Lactaid, which has bags which leak, and the SNS has a bottle which doesn't.)

Some mamas with low milk supply supp when they have to, (usually the morning feeding can go without a supp, if the baby is OK with it) and by the time the baby is on solids, the milk is enough to supplement the solids.

Keep you chin up, mama. You'll be OK.

Blessings

Maggie

 

As far as the glucophage, that would be continuous care needed. My insurance is up beginning in August. So right now, I'm mucking through the system fighting for care. Either they're going to have to pay for her formula or pay for my insurance so that I can breastfeed her. Either way, they're paying.

But I got in touch with another LC. Genna Wall. Apparently, she's a good one. Like world-reknown or something.

 

Oh, Holly! You can have some of my milk if you want it! We should start a milk co-op to help out our sisters in need! (Actually, I think it's against the law. ) I so hope that you resolve this! I have to agree with Mags though that at this point homeopathics and vitamins aren't going to cut it. Keep on comfort nursing that baby!

 

Gee, Holly.. that really sucks! Best of luck!

 

erm...I didn't want to even bring up THOSE issues...but thanks...

And I could find a milk bank, Jazz....But those are hella expensive.

This is HippyFreek, not mono...again...

 

It's not. You do have to think about liabilty issues, though, which is why LLL no longer does this. But, I remember "Milk Rings" years ago. They have fallen by the wayside in recent years, due to Hep and HIV ect.

If you guys decide to do a milk ring, go to http://www.hmbana.org/ for details on how to pasturize the milk. Then don't tell ME. LOL! Love you all. (That is the website for the Human Milk Banking of North America.)

Jester, I sure hope that was a comforting comment. There is NO reason for Holly or anyone else to feel like less of anything. She is doing EVERYTHING she can. She is ALL womyn!!!! And ALL mama!

 

Here's the site on how to do the Holder Method of Milk Pasturization. All you do is not have to send it to the lab for testing, if you are making it for a freind.
http://www.leron-line.com/MilkBanking.htm

 

that is sooo great that Milk Banks and the like are around. I know I would donate to you Holly if you were in my area, once I was actively feeding I mean. Am sure there are others in your area who would do the same... at least a person would hope so! I know in my crappy assed small town there are people who would give us milk if we needed it....

 

It doesn't make sense to me at all that you have to have a prescription for human milk but you can get formula at Wal-Mart! I think you should have to have a scrip for formula! If that was the case and womyn were aggressively counciled, educated and supported, maybe we would have more BF babies!

 

I totally agree...if formula wasn't so readily available, more people would choose to bf for the convenience!

 

I will admit that *I* felt inadequate when fighting breastfeeding problems, sometimes. Sometimes I felt really angry. Sometimes I felt optimistic, even. But I wouldn't presume to know how Holly feels. That's why I suggested MOBI (mothers overcoming breastfeeding issues). There are women on that list who are dealing with all sorts of complicated emotions from their inability to breastfeed, problems with breastfeeding, having weaned and regret it, and on and on and on. And there she may find someone in exactly the same place she is in, or who was there last month, who can help her through it. I never ever would have managed to survive my oldest child's first few months without the support from those very incredible women.

 

That's a great link, boogiemama. Thank you!