~HOMEMAKERS~ Has it EVOLVED????

Well you just described me on a daily basis and I have three children, two of which are twins. I just go nonstop all day basically. Between household chores, cooking, playing and doing crafts/projects with the kids...honestly? I think it all boils to how you manage your day. I don't know.

 

yeah, i can't do that. i think there's a great difference personalities that go on there, hcm. doing all that like that would make me a mental case. in fact, just trying to did. i get the basics done, my job is all upkeep now. a minute here, a minute there. but measl from scratch would probably have me killing myself in a year.

 

one of the things that dave had to come to terms with is that i never have a day or evening off. i don't even have free time when i'm sleeping, because i stil have to change diapers and get water, and if they're sick, i take care of that, too. dave works outside the home, therefore he doesn't do any of that. he's on a fixed schedule, so it wouldn't be fair to expect it. but despite the physical ease of my job, the mental toll is the hardest to understand.

 

Yeah, I'm one of those people that just go nonstop until I eventually wear myself down and I'm ready to snap, usually right around PMS time, which isn't a good thing. I have people telling me I do too much, my own husband says I'm too hard on myself many times.

I don't know, I'm just really fast-paced I guess, oh and a little obsessive compulsive.

But seriously though, if I'm not busy, I get super restless and irritable, which is why I just go, go, go nonstop. My mother said I was like that as a child too, always the busy bee.

 

I agree 100% KC. Some days I wish for some time off so to speak, it just rarely ever happens. Nobody offers to help out, most of the family feel that they can't handle all three of my kids at once for extended periods of time, mainly because two of them are very rambumctious twins, I don't have any other sitters to call upon, so it's like, time off is few and far between.

My own mother says I need to have a break now and then, but she's rarely ever available to help out due to her work schedule at the hospital, so it's like, the idea is good, but it just doesn't materialize.

The thing I tell myself though when I'm feeling really burned out is that before I know it, my kids will be older and won't be needing me the way they do now. So, while it can be tough some days, I know that it won't last.

 

i'm definitely a type b personality. my kids show show it, for sure. our best days are those nice warm days where i can just sit out on the back lawn with them while they look for bugs. kai's really picked up on crafts lately, but painting is her true joy. she's good. dave brings home these huge rolls of plotter paper and we unroll it on the back lawn and hand the girls some paint. it's a riot. we've got a couple of these now, and i have to say, they're just plain pretty.

 

i also have a pretty vicious temper, i have to say. if i let myself get to wound up and tired, i'll explode. i used to try to do so much more. then i realized me kids were happier when i was happy. though yesterday we didnt' get to do anything fun, because kai REFUSED to clean her room.

 

Me, I just start snapping at people on Hip Forums and being unusually quiet at home, sulking with a pouty face around the house and crying over silly things. Ahem. Yesterday. *coughs*

 

that is so fucking sweet and perfect

 

i am a Liberal Arts/Educations with an emphasis in child psychology...it's like I went to school for my Mrs...and maybe I did-just a little

 

I have a degree in psychology (behavioral and developmental) and history. I wish I wanted to be a stay at home mom. But for so long my focus has been on my career that I think it will be hard to change. Although it might when I do have kids. I have also had a job scence I was 14 so I don't know what it's like not to work. I even worked my way through school. So who knows things might change.

 

I just quit my upper management job to go to grad school and be a child psychologist...then things changed really quickly and I met someone special and really just want to get married now and worry about school later. I never thought I wanted to be a 'housewife' before meeting this person. I might still go to grad school in the fall I am unsure...it depends on a lot of things right now

 

when I did declare this major though I did not work and was engaged to someone who did not want a wife who worked at all and he made the sacrifices to make me comftrable with that decision. Too bad you can't help who you fall out of love with

 

I quit my job to stay home with the kids... he never asked me. He just said I can do whatever makes me happy. I am thinking of picking up a part time job when we move into our new house in a month so I can have some extra cash for myself. I usually get alot done in a day... I always make dinner (I enjoy it) and I usually plan it for when he gets home because the poor guy usually works 10-15 hrs a day (and damn well deserves a good meal when he gets to finally relax). I do laundry daily (that way there is hardly any), I clean daily (hey, only takes an hour tops!) and get to spend the rest of the day playing. We go on picnics, walks, the park, the zoo... I absolutely love it. I cook and bake because I love to, I keep my house spotless because I am happy that way. I guess though that because he never complains or asks for anything I don't think about cooking and cleaning as a chore. If I sometimes feel like not doing anything I never get asked about it, I love that. He just wants us all happy, fed, and loved... I say he does a pretty damn good job providing that. None of what I do could be possible without him. HES AMAZING. lol

 

yep... a lot of the women i worked with started working part time to save up for an education fund, or after their kids were in university to help towards their monthly living costs for the student (who went to school in another city usually)... part time gigs afford a lot of flexibility too when you find a good company, it worked out well for those who were doin it that way. plus they got some retail therapy in before or after work often, heh

 

I am confused...do you guys not all have joint accounts? if you're married it shouldn't matter who is working OUTSIDE of the home if you are home all day with kids and cleaning up. You guys are seriously scaring me into thinking marraige is going to put me in this completley powerless situation. I am sure it depends on who you marry, but from a lot of you it sounds like you think everything is your husbands and not your because he 'lets' you stay home with the kids...THE kids, not your kids

 

meaning they are both of your kids, not just yours and that taking care of three young kids is not fucking easy. you guys are seriously making me want to stay here and get my masters. i think its the pain pills, or you guys i am not sure

 

we have a joint account. i'd rather have a seperate account. it's easier to keep track of shit that way.

 

cool beans. i don't want to be on any of the credit cards or savings accounts-even if I am working and making bank because I am sooo bad with money, so bad that i think a nordstroms sale and a credit card could easily ruin my marriage.

 

there's a lot of things that have to be worked out, ironed out, hammered out, thrown out. but in the end, if you're patient and reasonable with each other, it's works out fine. my favorite advice? you take turns having bad days. if he's having a bad day, and his started first, you have to chill. and vice versa. it's saved so much for me a dave.