hahahahahaaa!!!! the candyland one is great - they have to watch every video you own, of course leaving all the tapes & boxes in a pile for you to sort out they eat stuff that's been in your cupbord for three years, while trying to convince you that 'it's not bad at all!'
try 3 year old caviar, that was donated in the first place. then there was the jalapeno jelly my friend made that i saved for chili spicin, i guess it LOOKED like mint jelly wish i would have seen him eat that though! that would have been funny as hell...
your kid is running around saying that bedtime is a control mechanism of The Man. (in my house it s a control mechanism of the hippie mema but whatever) Your 13 y-o asked you to sign his CO papers for when the Marines show up at career day.