How long should I feel guilty?

What? I don't understand what you are saying! your dating a girl that's 15 right now?

 

I'm not sure about innocence and purity.

But betrayal of trust, absolutely.

And I agree, mom leaving doesn't cut it for an excuse. Maybe it is honestly part of the problem, maybe you heard that somewhere and latched onto it. Most likely a variety of family related problems.

I, personally, would say you need to make amends with them, and without guilt tripping them into "accepting" it or anything, simply explain that you're sorry, and whatnot.

But that might not be a good idea, because they're still underage and trying to understand it, and you're still a predator, in the simplest terms.... maybe some day.

And get counseling.

*edit* Oh dayum. He's with a 15 year old now. Dude that's fucking bad. They can seem all mature and shit, they're NOT, 15-20 you do a lot of growing up. And younger girls latch onto older guys and get fucked up like that. You need to STOP that shit. It's just easy for you to hold onto them because you're totally out of the league of all the guys their age. Stop being a fucking creeper, if she's 20 and you're 26 thats one thing, if shes 15 and your 21 its a whole 'nother thing.

If you're really currently with a 15 year old: please go to jail. You obviously haven't learned anything.

 

I think you should just say fuck it who cares. there is nothing you can do about it. if you don't let it go you'll never forget about and you could get fucked up in the head.

anyway I have heard of way worse stuff than that. and the people I heard it from walk around as if nothing ever happened, because they let it go. it's the only thing to do.

 

I usually like to read every post on a thread, but this one is quite long

it is very likely that you have caused some trauma to the young girls that you were involved with

having people verbally abuse you will not make the situation better. feeling horrible about yourself will not make the situation better

the thing that will make the situation better is to try to undo any harm that you may have caused

why not go to a therapist about this? I don't know what the laws are on confidentiality, but you may be able to talk to a therapist without being turned in

with the help of a therapist, hopefully you can go back to these girls and make an apology for your behaviour

I think that this would go a very long way toward helping them, and also helping yourself

the thing that makes any thing wrong is that is causes suffering. undo the suffering you have caused, and you can be released from your own suffering

please just try to find a good therapist and start the process of healing those to whom you have caused harm and also healing yourself

you have taken a good first step by admitting what you have done and talking about it here

 

I admit that its weird, but there's always someone in the world more fucked up than you.

It sucks that your mom left and all that. you just need to meet some good-hearted hippy women who will just talk to you without passing judgement.

You could just change your surroundings and start fresh. who what when where why does not apply.

if you can't get over it you'll probably suffer all your life, or kill yourself. I suggest neither of those but I'm just saying.


I know someone who fucked a dog. see, you're not the most fucked up person in the world.

keep your head up. keep moving on keep trying to stay strong.

 

How long WE think you SHOULD feel guilty? Sorry, wrong thinking, wrong question.

You WILL feel guilty until you resolve that issue with yourself. That will be when you can tell another person about it without thinking that they will hate or despise you for it. This might require outside help but if it does will depend on you.

BUT ..... I have to say dating a 15 year old girl at 21 might not be the way to go.

 

if you are going out with a fifteen year old now... i'd say what was once possiby a stupid decision at young age

has now turned into blatant pedophilia.

 

I would say it was blatant pedophilia a while ago. While doing it once, regretting it deeply, and refraining from the act ever again would be understandable. And even twice would happen from time to time with non pedophiles. However 3 offenses plus a 15 year old girlfriend at your age unfortunately points in the direction of the simple truth. That you might be a pedophile. If you care for human life and happiness, please seek therapy to try and work on this problem, otherwise, I can foresee a very confusing, difficult and perverse mindset for you in the future, perhaps more so the now taking into account future offenses, unless you can work through it. Situations like that are what mess up girls lives forever. Comon dude, when I was 18 I had the chance to date this 14 year old girl who I admit I had a crush on, but you just need to KNOW better then that. When you turn the legal age of consent, you now are committing a crime having a sexual relationship with someone not of legal consent. Now exceptions are common when the ages are close and perhaps they have been dating for a while. But when you are twenty, dating someone below the age of 18 should be at least something to think about before jumping in. When you are all of age, then its all good.

 

My dad died when I was little and it didn't make me want to touch little boys. Even if I did want to touch little boys, I don't think anything in my brain would ever link the death of my father to that particular mental state. Thats just psycho-babble.

I hate when people blame their past on their present. Sure, you were only 16 but you should have known better at 16. You made the choice, and it was a choice.

And now you're 21 and dating a 15 year old, and the way go on and on about manipulation makes me think you're possibly a psychopath. Not in the mean way that people will call other people psycho sometimes, but a clinical psychopath.

I don't really know what to say. I could say "get help" but how is a therapist going to change your inner nature? I could say "confess everything and face the consequences," but you wouldn't do it.

Just stay away from any girl under 18, dude. You're fucking these girls up for LIFE. Thats not something that people ever recover from.

oh yeah, you're right. All he needs is a caring earth-mother to love so he can molest her daughters.

What. the. fuck. Have you people gone mad?

 

I think so. But:

Keep in mind that there are lots of pedos who understand that they've got a problem, and don't go destroying peoples lives. This guy's got at least 3 or 4 under his belt, and is going strong. There's a difference.

 

Agreed, before he was saying that he's sorry, wants to be punished etc, but he's still doing it, which I don't understand. If you feel guilty and ashamed, why not stop?

How can an adult have interest in a 15 yr old, both have different levels of maturity. She's still a kid.

 

Which is what he's attracted to.

He likes younger girls, probably because (though he doesn't know it, he's told himself some shit about his mommy problems being responsible) he can exercise much more control over them than someone his age. He could force his young relatives, by virtue of about twice their life experience and coercive ability, to do things, and 15 is still young enough to be very malleable and gullible, and maybe even more so, because it's old enough to be trying to be older, and be THAT girl in high school, with the old boyfriend, with his own car, alcohol, etc. But it's also old enough that he can pretend that it's normal, she looks grown up, wears makeup, has tits, etc.

He can act like he's moved on, "healed", etc, and now has healthy interests, isn't a loser because he has a girlfriend, etc.

 

I know, and I tried to capture that understanding in my post. But it is difficult to be understanding of situations like this. Even as an extremely sexually open individual.

 

What I wanna know is how did he meet his 15 year old girlfriend?

 

probably on the internet

 

I think theres a whole other thread about how they met, if you want to continue following this pedopera.

 

How long should you feel guilty?.........Forever!!!


I really think you should be feeling the harsh reality of prison.

 

I guess I didn't read the part that said you were dating a fifteen year old girl.

 

what is the greatest thing about screwing 27 year olds????

... there's 20 of them :frown:

 

all I was saying is that someone showing him a little bit of love and kindness could have made all the difference.