How Many of You Girls/Women Get along with your mothers?

My mom and I get along ok...except she bitches at me for stuff and then tells me to stop wearing dark colors and dress more like a girl. But she doesnt understand that I dress the way I want to be different from the other girls.

 

Me and my mum are good friends. the only thing she wishes i do is vist her more. she lives two hours away from me.

 

My mum is pretty conservative and judgemental and she doesn't accept many of the choices I've made in my life. When I lived at home with my parents, we would fight constantly and drive each other crazy. Then I moved to live by myself and things got a bit better. My mum's a lawyer but she has always wanted to study archaeology and a bit less than a year ago she started studying it on her free time. She has also started to write detective stories. She seems a lot happier now and a bit more laid-back. But then again.. we now live in different countries, over 1000 miles away from each other.. so maybe we both just try to get along when we actually get together and not waste that time on fighting.

 

I Think That Its Amazing That So Many Of You Get Along Well Wlth Youre Moms,when I Was Alot Younger,my Mom And I Were Constantly At Odds...she Did Not Approve Of The Choices I Made,and Was Quite Outspoken About It.my Father Was A Lifer In The Air Force So The Folks Were Strict.poor Dad Had 4 Girls!my Mom Used To Tell Me I Hope You Have 10 Of Them Just Like You!!!the Mothers Curse..i Had 1 Who Can Be Like 10 Of Me In 1 Pkg..shes A Pistol.anyway,we Finally Made Our Peace,me And My Mom And Had A Good 5 Yrs.and Accepted Who Each Other Are.you Never Know What The Future Holds,my Mom Went For Surgery And Never Made It Out Of The Hospital,she Was 61,i Thought She Would Allways Be There And She Still Is,but On Another Plane...i Think About Her All The Time And I Know She Is Keeping An Eye Out For Me.its Funny How The Older You Get,the Smarter Youre Parents Are.perhaps Not Allways,but Lifes Lessons Are Amazing.all I Can Say Is Live Today As Though It Were Youre Last,cuz You Just Never Know....audreyanne

 

that was beautiful audreyanne . I'm so glad y'all got to be at peace with each other before she passed on.

 

i have to keep myself from mothering my mother. over the last 10 years or so, she's made some really truly horrible life decisions (almost died a couple of times from cocaine overdoses, fun stuff like that!!). i've had to release her, and let her go to make her own mistakes in her own life, and let her do her own growing and learning. i thought that she had been doing much better in the last couple of years, but now i'm not so sure about that. she seems to be falling into some of her old patterns.

she totally accepts me as an individual but in a way, she just doesnt even bother to know who i am, so sometimes i wonder how she can honour me as an individual if she doesnt know who that individual is.

 

my Mum and I have a very good relationship. We live in a distance and that is ok, because when i`m coming home in the hollidays, we are in loggerheads with each other after some days (because i`m not as neat as she is....) the distance made our relationship better. we are telephoning almost every day and taking part of the other ones life. i love her very much and i know, she would do almost everything for me, because i`m her only child. sometimes i feel, she is too much in sorrow about me.

 

My mother and I are pretty close...especially when she had my little sister four years ago. Since we have kids around the same age, we have a lot more in common. Just as long as I adamantly avoid the topics of religion, politics and anything else controversial. When she married her husband, she morphed into some super-conservative fundamentalist baptist...because he was. Before, she was more independantly religious and middle-of-the road as far as politics go. Hell, we even smoked pot together when I was 18! But, I love her, she is a great woman...and I think she did a pretty damn good job raising me!

 

My mother and I really do not get along. I think it is because she does not accept me for who I am. (Although she would loudly claim that she does.) She is of the impression that I should be exactly like her in all ways, like I am judging her if I make choices which are different than hers. I was raised with a LOT of Irish Catholic guilt, which I soundly reject. (Well the guilt part, at least.) She has been on a cruise for almost a month, and I am feeling very peaceful. That's sad. But when she calls, it is always something that is an attempt to make me feel obligated or guilty about something I didn't do for HER, and often I don't even pick up the phone and run to turn off the machine. sigh.

We chose to parent VERY differently. She chose detachment strategies, I chose attachment ones. She almost always takes the easiest less contact way to do things, and then blames others when things do not work out (as they often do, when you skimp on everything.)

She blames all her problems on:

• My father, who she has been divorced from for more than 20 years, yet still blames him for many of her problems she causes herself
• Her father, who has been dead for 30 years, and whom she never had any contact with after she was 19 or so.
• Her sisters. They are all in their 60s and 70s, yet somehow they are still responsible for her misery.
• Doctors, nurses, freinds, her husband, me, my sister, our husbands, store clerks, anyone but herself. It is an exhausting relationship.

 

LOL my mother and I never got along for long/that well while I lived there, but now we're good friends. We're opposite sides of the political spectrum, so we mainly stay away from that subject, but other than one fight we had over political crap, we've gotten much closer since I've been on my own. I know she doesn't approve of everything I do, but I don't approve of everything she does either. We mostly leave each other alone on that stuff too, since neither of us is a crack addict or anything that would require one of us saying something to help the other. I also have made an effort to be closer to her since I had my baby and realized a major life truth...you love your baby MUCH more than they will ever love you. Plus even though I don't agree with much of how she raised my siblings and I, she's very respectful about what I want for Jeremy (like she smacked our thighs when we were probably around his age when we'd bite a boob or pull hair or something, but I told there will be no hitting of jeremy ever and she has respected that so far) The thing is she treats me like an adult now, while still being my mother when I need that. And by that I mean her and my dad still help us out, you know like they bought us a new car seat when Jeremy got so huge so fast, as a surprise cause we were trying to figure out/move around our budget to be able to afford a car seat right then. (they can be like 200 dollars!) She's actually a much better person than I thought when I was a teenager LOL

 

my mom and i get along great sometimes... then she blows up on me if she is having a bad day or something. we take alot of shit out on each other and we have been through so much. i just wish she could stop having such a bad temper.. but then again, i wish that about myself too.

 

I am so glad that so many of you; diverse,cultured, eloquent, unique women shared this-a very special part of your relationship with your mothers.

I have observed on quite many posts that the topics of "religion" and "politics" are difficult to approach- even with the one that reared us.

I know in my case it's because I was raised in a good ole' christian home. One that went to church on Wednesdays and Sundays and even revival time too!!!

Now, I believe in my opinion that none of that is necessary to live a rewarding and joyful life here on Earth and Wherever we roam in the Universe or -outside of it. IF I were to tell this to my mother- she would think me "MAD" and irrational. -To each their own.
She doesn't understand why I don;t get a fitting style for my hair- instead of allowing it to cascade down my back and "just lay."
(She is funny with her expressions .)
But, as I read your stories, I hope that this is therapeutic to ALL OF U- in some shape, way or form. Most importantly, I hope it inspires you to rekindle relationships, speed up any healing of broken hearts along the way, and helps you to remember any fond memories that got tucked away in the back of your mind.
Prosperity to U ALL!

 

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My mom & I get along great, always have. I have the coolest parents in the world.

 

Wow, if your mom and my dad weren't both married, they'd be perfect for each other.

 

i get along with my mom great. we talk about a lot of different things. sometimes she thinks i have bad tast in things or i have an 'ugly' or 'nonmatching' outfit on she doesn't like or her hating my blue converse sneaks but other than that she and i talk a lot. I hate telling my mom about any bad grades in school though if i dont i feel bad about myself. she can always tell if i'm sad or angry. or if somehting great happend. overall our relationship is really good.

 

Hmm... I love my mother and she loves me. But no we do not get along. She is extremely judgemental. She is what I call a religious zealot who in my opinion has been brainwashed and stripped of much of her common sense by her church. If you don't live your life, the way she thinks that everyone should live it, ie) get married by 23 and have a family of 2 or 3 kids a dog, a pool, make at the very least $35,000 a year (a piece) send your kids to private school, go to church every Sunday, can't be gay, can't have an opinion, have to be "ruled" by a man, because god forbid a woman be independant, and if your husband beats the shit out of you breaking your back and knocking your teeth out, you are supposed to say thank you.

Sorry to go off like that, but that is seriously 100% what she believes in. She disowned me because I didn't go to college when I was 18 (lived in the real world and paid my own way through life instead, now I am finishing my degree). She thinks that she is better than everyone else and that she has no flaws or problems. It is very hard for us to hold a conversation because nothing I say or do is good enough and she is constantly putting me down.

I was always a daddy's girl growing up. He and I have a strained relationship as well because we are both stubborn but I get along much better with him because at least I have respect for him, and he does for me. We might not always agree, but we can agree to disagree. Guess that is why we both ran from my mom. She's a nut.

 

My mother is a super conservative and there are still so many things about me that she doesn't know because I know what would happen if I told her. That angers me sometimes, just because I could never talk to her about things out of fear of her reaction. We get a long better since I've moved out. She complains a lot when I'm braless (most of the time) and about what I want to do with my life. She wants me to be a doctor, because no one in my family ever really went to college. She has pretty much said she'd disown me if I had a baby before I was 25 (because that's when she had me). She called me while I was at a drum circle (she calls a lot) and she freaked out because she thought I'd somehow get put in jail for drumming in a park. She's one of these people that never questions anything as long as someone with money says it's good or okay. If the US bombed the rest of the world off the planet she wouldn't really care. I love her though. lol

 

I get along with my mum (or Kerrie as I like to call her) pretty much most of the time...I'd have to include her in my buddy list anyway...

Christianity and Politics mixed together...she's a little confused...some weeks she likes Bush and other weeks she hates him...the weeks that she likes him we have quite a few 'debates'

Yes. She is very excepting of me as an individual...cept sometimes when it comes to my vegetarianism

 

OH MY GOD. SHE'S COMING OVER IN AN HOUR........... (Maggie sobs into her shirt......)