I literally Hate depression.

I figuratively hate breasts...

Wait, nevermind.

 

i honestly love and prefer that state of meditative detatchment others, rightly or wrongly (i have no idea and don't see as particularly pertinent which) assume to be depression when they observe it in me.

i would be a much happier camper if no one ever felt they were doing the world a favor to go out of their way to do anything they can think of to robb me of it!

(of course if they wanted to do this by bestowing wealth beyond my wildest dreams of avarice, far be it from me to disappoint them by refusing to accept it)

=^^=
.../\...

 

wow.

that was a low day for me. didnt even realize it was blue monday.

anyways... i understand both sides of the original post.... depressed people that get you down... especially when you have dealt with depression for so long... arrrrgh, but um... judging someone and saying "they ONLY HAD THIS happen to them....." it sounds like someone that has never dealt with - depression= im sure they've been sad but depression is called a disease for a reason.

 

I like how depression causes ups and downs, like being drunk on a rollercoaster

 

But do you realllly love it or hate it?

Probably both at diff. times.

 

Yea true! Like when I feel optimistic about life, I feel like Im high on opiates, and when I feel defeated and worthless I feel like Im hungover So probably, my love for it may outweigh the hatred. By .01%

 

Yeah it can depend on the day though.

The worst for me is trying to figure out if its the physical causing the depression or the depression causing the physical. Mostly my tiredness, endo ., migraines... do they happen because im depressed (cause im not in great spirits when they occur) or do i get in bad spirits cause the pain? Its very confusing. Enough to make you more depressed.. til the day you feel better and all is good and the pain goes away... makes you wonder even more but still doesnt answer the question.... yah....

 

I know, when ever I feel down I noticed that my joints start to ache pretty bad, and my back gets it the worst. And that makes it even harder for me to get my self up and do what I need to get done. I am starting to think though, that it really could be the depression causing the physical, I mean lack of endorphines and energy possibly?

 

yeah, i find myself addicted to ibuprofen. the harder life gets, the more down i am, the less i sleep, the less i recuperate, the less i socialize and feel good. it feed upon itself. but like i said, when that happens, i get so ANGRY. i think it's one of the reasons i'm still not medicating for it. i manage toget pissed off enough to sorta jump out of it. i don't know if that's clinical depression or what, but when i'm fighting to get out of the hole, the minute someone around me is in it i get furious. i go crazy mean.

 

My anger and arguing has almost kinda gotten me outta it before...waking me up in a way its hard to explain so I feel you there.

Funny relayer, with you talking about your joints and back...those are two of the main things bugging me lately.... i got a small, extra check in the mail yesterday which we should use for "other" but im thinking of going to a chropractor cause i just cant stant the pain.
Anyways.... who knows? It's kinda like, chicken or the egg?

Ahhhhh