"I'm gonna be a Catholic priest"

well, none of my really close friends are particularly religious, so it would surprise the crap out of me and id wonder whats going on. id want to know why. a nd for one friend... id suspect shes running away from all her troubles

my rather religious friend (not super close to, but decently enough), well... id worry about her not fulfilling her goals/doing what she wants. id suggest she put it off for a year, since shes going to graduate in a year from uni (she doesnt even have classes left, just an 8month internship program) and after taht make sure she can do what she wants while being a nun. well, not make sure, but talk out possible paths and suchlike. with her id be supportive, because it wouldnt be completely shocking (though i think shed miss her anime and internet terribly)

 

It makes perfect sense, and I believe you made the right decision. Devoting your life to the service of God doesn't mean that you have to be a priest/nun either. In fact, it's probably even more of a challenge with the worries and pressures of normal everyday life to think about too.

 

oddly enough

i am interested in monkery

but more of the buddhist variety

[during my rare serious moments]

agar instead of kudzu?

 

giving things up is one of the most attractive aspects of it

imho

[things are such a burden]

 

Edit: Wow didn't realize this was such a long post...sorry for that, but I think it's what I really think, read if you want to find out.

I was raised Catholic, although I still live by what I consider good morals and am very spiritual I sure as hell am not in any way shape or form Catholic, nor do I believe in their notion of "God".

My brother on the other hand always did everything my parents wanted, never questioned anything....just kinda took the road that said "follow this path, don't bother choosing your own." Needless to say he's still Catholic and honestly although I'd be a bit surprised it wouldn't be that shocking. I'd like to think I'd support him in anything he wanted to do with his life so long as it made him happy and didn't harm others. I can't deny that I wouldn't wish he had chosen to do something else though. Which involves a little more of developing his own thoughts and beliefs through the knowledge he obtains through learning and experiencing the many different things (ideals etc...) life has to offer.

This also got me thinking. All to often if not 100% of the time priests say that they get this calling and that's when they know they want/need to become a priest. Well, a priest I use to know told me he knew this when he was graduating from college, and claims he "had it all" from a nice sports car to a good girlfriend. That also caused me to think that most the things he claimed he had were simply material and as many of us know material things while they are pleasurable they certainly do not mean happiness. (If you don't understand the difference between pleasure and happiness please read Aristotle's nicomedian ethics) That made me think even more about how this "call" could simply be thier need/longing for something more than the material and in turn they turn to whatever it is that is most readily available to them in order to do so.

I like to think there's two kinds of hope in this world, one constitutes faith and the other false hope. Example: Faith is something such as "I have faith in my brother because he's been there in the past when I've gone through tough times and therefore there's a good chance I can count on him in the future."

False hope is what I'd like to consider the hope/wishful thinking in something that we don't necessarily know will be there to help us, we just really would like to think it would. So we build these beliefs in our heads, or are more willing to accept the beliefs of others.

Now, if you're thinking I have some beef with all religions, I don't. In fact I have a big false hope of my own that really I hope is true. That being that I think/hope that all religions hold some truth to them, and I don't know if I believe that simply because I really do hope that so many people aren't being duped or because it's a legitimate feeling I have.

 

If my imaginary brother told me he was becoming a priest I'd assume it was a dodge for an easer life(I'm not saying it's a very easy life but it's pretty easy) but then I worked right beside a seminary for years and for a lot of them it was a way to escape from responsibility and to have a easy life, of those it was cos they really couldn't handle basic decision making and life in general. In fact now that I think of it I can't remember any who wasn't odd in some ways, not necessarily always bad, though is some cases very obviously bad, but just not quite standard. the best one was a guy who fucked his way through tons of women not one night stands but always had a string of women whit whom he was playing out the same act with him:'If only I wasn't so committed to being a priest I could would spend my life with you' Her:'Let me suck your dick you wonderful deep man' he did the same thing with lots of women dropped out or talked about dropping out for a bit so he could really be with one of them and she fled the scene; he dropped back in. plenty of those guys were just herded in there by their parents. I have thought that if my life went tits up I'd join and have an easy life the trick would be to agree with everything and not rock the boat cos if you did that you got sent off to some rotten part of the world where you wouldn't interfere with the money making.

 

this is a bit off topic, but where do you draw the line between being supportive and advising your friend or loved one against something you sincerely believe is not in their best interest?

I know people get very passionate about the big decisions they make and it's hard to influence them against what they want to do, but if I thought someone close to me was making a terrible decision that would stick with them for the long haul, I would certainly try to lead them off their chosen path. at the very least I'd make sure the decision was being made for the right reasons and they understood the long-term consequences.

 

I would maybe be surprised, but I wouldn't bad mouth his decision


I am not hung up on being anti-religious like most people here, even though I am not into formal religion myself.
Apart from fundamentalist religion, i think it can have a positive effect on some peoples lives.

 

I would reason that the decision was made after a great deal of thought on their part. The one thing I'm sure about in life is that I don't have all the answers... in fact that sum of wisdom I'm not yet privy to dwarfs what I do know. In my mind that disqualifies me from being able to criticize a carefully calculated decision that I may disagree with. Chances are, the person is aware that I might differ with them but have enough faith in me that they trust that I will not try to dissuade them- that I respect that they're doing what they feel is right for them.

Besides, I've found that all too often, voicing passionate objections will cement a decision with the added incentive of proving a dissenter wrong. If the choice is a bad one, they may be too blinded by the lack of support to see it.

 

you are right, of course. people's choices are their own, and no one can truly claim to know better as each situation and individual is different.

my reasoning assumes the loved one is someone young and/or inexperienced, and I'd want to guide them from making needless mistakes. but on reflection, mistakes have always been my best teachers, and it would be unfair not to let the people I care about make their own to learn for themselves.

however, I would still make sure they had given their choice a lot of thought, and I'd probably chime in with some things they might not have considered. I would want to make sure they knew what they were getting themselves into; I know for myself I made some big decisions when I was younger without really thinking them through, and I was lucky the consequences weren't greater.

 

Something along the lines of "I'm happy for you but remember that I'm here for you if you change your mind" to help preserve some dignity should they reconsider. You nailed it when you alluded to allowing other people to make their own mistakes. We usually come away from life's biggest tests as better people.