Dang girl, you just had to one up me with your 34D's, didn't you?! Well, guess what. I've got 3 inches over you in height, so ! Just kidding, I still love you.
I don't know if you're just fooling around, but they make shields to put over the nipple to help draw them out.
Seriously. The only reason I knew about it was when I was reading books on breastfeeding, and how some women had concerns because of inverted nipples. I guess they make some type of shield that can go over them to help. It gradually works over time to draw the nipple forward more.
Ouch. That doesn't sound like too much fun to me. I've got one of those shop vacs and those things pack some major power.