Is it cheating?

I would feel lucky to be your sex partner, love you

 

As a few other guys on this forum have experienced, if you can find me, you can. But, I wish to say I don’t like the word casual in my mind also…this thread is about cheating. Is that what you would be doing?

 

But don’t mix Love with this…it is just giving and getting enjoyment from sex.

 

Wow! That was subtle!

 

Yes…90% of the guys ask in private message…but I suppose I’m pretty open about what I do, so it’s fair game!

 

I think a lot of people ask, but actually when it got down to a lot would be hesitant lol

 

Perhaps. However, my beauty, even if you ARE in the top 1% of the bell curve, it's no reason to tolerate men disrespecting you. I know that you and I will never meet face-to-face, but that doesn't prevent me from feeling very protective towards you. Call me old-fashion.

 

All people are crazy about you and look forward to having sex with you

 

An I look forward to those “all people”!

 

I look at it this way. Sex is an activity that feels good. So is drinking a beer with a friend. So if you go out to the bar with said friend, male or female, are you cheating a spouse out of the enjoyment of having that beer? No, because you can come home and enjoy another beer with the spouse. Same with sex. You can also have sex with said spouse after. Another way I look at this cheating thing is the reason why most "cheat". It is because of lack of sex with the spouse. Since spouse won't fulfill your desire for sex isn't that cheating also? Cheating you out of the enjoyment of having sex with them. I call that reverse cheating.

 

So I’m like the keg of beer at the bar ! I have not the first hand knowledge but I do see colleagues and often guys I fuck who express that they used to have a good sex life and that it often changes when they get married or other formal relationship. When I go to big events such as sex clubs, that is often oversexed younger guys looking to show off with a big cock…but during the weekdays, I am often with smaller groups and often they are regular guys (I don’t ask details) and many seem like they are just not getting it at home…so as you say, they need to go have a beer once in a while.

 

Lmao so true

 

It depends on the relationship they have but most 'normal' couples would say yes. For my parents for instance it would likely be immediate divorce. I'd probably put myself in this camp but (thankfully) I'm not married so idk.

That said I've met other people whose partners go on girls/guys holidays and they just get to sleep with whomever then go back to monogamy at home. So I guess I would say if it was a known and agreed thing no but if its behind their back then yes.

 

I'll drink to that! Reminds me of a Jimmy Buffett song titled "Why Don't We Get Drunk".

 

Many women would enjoy living the life you do. Mine wife enjoyed a few adventures at swing clubs, but not quite so daring.

 

My wife's dad cheated on her mother their whole married life. He provided and even bragged on her but it seems he had nymphomania as a compulsive sex disorder where he just couldn't get enough. And she still loved him until the day she died. "The sins of the father shall visit the children" and my wife inherited it and i discovered i had a Nymphomaniac. every ma's dream?-- it isn't what you think. Yea we fucked all the time day and night and i was hypersexitive myself where i could stay in the saddle with her but knew it was more than i could do. So it should not have been a surprise to hear "She is cheating on you"? But i still would have killed the SOB if i could have found him. So she lived the second life like her dad. They changed every time to not get attached and were not looking for a replacement. She was excellent at caring for the kids and the house and was always fun and a joy and always kept pimp very well satisfied. She kept very busy with things, repented every Sunday and was able to hold off for a long time but sooner or later she would trigger. I was gone a lot that made more opportunity. But "what is done in secret shall be shouted from the house top" Everyone Knows and i took the shame and ridicule believing it was more my fault for letting her get by with it. But i was able to keep my kids together. So Just like her mother,Yea it hurts but i still love her because i understand. But i have never cheated and cheating has not visited my kids and there are no adultery's among my kids or their kids

 

If a person and their partner is not in an open marriage & sex with other people is not on the table, then it is cheating regardless of intent in my opinion. It's pretty black and white to me and with no morality or judgement involved.

As for why they did it or intent involved (just sex or whether emotions were involved), that's another story. Much more grey area I guess. Hell, some people (definitely not me) think masturbation, using sex toys, or even watching porn is cheating. Each person is different.

 

I wonder what the term is for the situation that a guy has sex 'outside' the marriage because the wife has stopped doing it and expects him to live like a monk.

Both genders need sex for their bodily and mental health. It should never be weaponised.

 

I believe the term is "you're fucked and there's nothing you can do about it." Well, there's something you can do about it and it's called cheating and more so if negotiated infidelity cannot be established. The logic of both sexes needing sex for their health is sound but outside of a medical issue that prevents sex, the weaponizing of sex is an emotional thing that logic cannot stand up against. You can tell someone this and they'll say, "Yeah, but..." and what follows is, yeah, I understand what you're saying but - and add a bunch of shit why sex is being withheld or otherwise weaponized and if it's the woman who has done this - and it usually is - she will stand on her right not to have sex with you if she doesn't want to - and she doesn't want to.

So, either you cheat, or you do nothing and be celibate like a monk. In this, you do not have the right to handle this situation in the best way you can.

 

I have been able to hold off on committing Adultery though there were golden opportunities is so wa allnted to to because of self control or maybe just too chicken. I was able to actually take advantage of the energy of the extreme desires with work and became more of a workaholic as a replacement addiction. In the country all the recreation you can do is just out the door and she did much the same but sooner or later she would trigger. Later on i was able to make a good living being gone three days a week to be home more with her and hope to keep her satisfied but it seems she took advantage of the days i was gone even more and suspect she had became part of a group and acts she would be ashamed to do with me. I think she wanted to get me into it with her because she said that i should cheat because i deserve it and said she new girls that would just love to sleep with me and that i should. Then she got to where sex was too painful and seemed to be stretched out of shape, She claimed her bladder had fell but sex holds the bladder up and she was getting plenty of sex. I fear someone fisted her and tore her up inside. But she don't cheat anymore though. If you fool around with that type of people that is what you get?