Let's talk.

Discussion in 'Random Thoughts' started by DrRainbow, Jun 6, 2020.

  1. DrRainbow

    DrRainbow Ambassador of Love

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    Two boys go into a forest and walk around. Suddenly they see a naked women, then one of the boys run away. The other chases after him. The boy asked "Why did u run away?" The other said "My mom told me if i saw a naked women i'd turn to stone, i already felt something getting getting hard."
     
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  2. DrRainbow

    DrRainbow Ambassador of Love

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    A man and a woman meet in an elevator. "Where are you heading today?" the man asks. "I'm going down to give blood." "How much do you get paid for giving blood?" "About $20." "Wow," says the man, "I'm going up to donate sperm, and the sperm bank pays $100." The woman angrily gets off the elevator. The next day, the man and woman meet in the elevator again. "Fancy meeting you again. Where you off to today?" "Sperm bank," she says with her mouth full.
     
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  3. Candy Gal

    Candy Gal Lifetime Supporter

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    Yep jokes help this thread. X
     
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  4. DrRainbow

    DrRainbow Ambassador of Love

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    We need someone to talk for England in the Brexit negotiation.
     
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  5. DrRainbow

    DrRainbow Ambassador of Love

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    Let me take this opportunity to assure everyone that I do not like most of these jokes. I post them just in case members are in the mood for them. I am about to start animating jokes like these and voicing them. I do not like them but I love the money that it will make.
     
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  6. DrRainbow

    DrRainbow Ambassador of Love

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    My girlfriends dad asked me what I do. Apparently, "your daughter" wasn't the right answer.
     
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  7. DrRainbow

    DrRainbow Ambassador of Love

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    Son: Dad do you remember your first blowjob? Dad: Ohhh yeah I do! Son: How did it taste? Dad: Get out.
     
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  8. Captain Scarlet

    Captain Scarlet Lifetime Supporter

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  9. Captain Scarlet

    Captain Scarlet Lifetime Supporter

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  10. Captain Scarlet

    Captain Scarlet Lifetime Supporter

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  11. Captain Scarlet

    Captain Scarlet Lifetime Supporter

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  12. Captain Scarlet

    Captain Scarlet Lifetime Supporter

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  13. Captain Scarlet

    Captain Scarlet Lifetime Supporter

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  14. Captain Scarlet

    Captain Scarlet Lifetime Supporter

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  15. DrRainbow

    DrRainbow Ambassador of Love

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    There was a businessman who was getting ready to go on a long business trip. He knew his wife was a flirtatious sort, so he thought he'd try to get her something to keep her occupied while he was gone, because he didn't much like the idea of her screwing someone else. So he went to a store that sold sex toys and started looking around. He thought about a life-sized sex doll, but that was too close to another man for him. He was browsing through the dildos, looking for something special to please his wife, and started talking to the old man behind the counter. He explained his situation, the old man. "Well, I don't really know of anything that will do the trick. We have vibrating dildos, special attachments, and so on, but I don't know of anything that will keep her occupied for weeks, except …" said the old man, and then he stopped. "Except what?" asked the businessman. "Nothing, nothing," said the old man. "C'mon, tell me! I need something!" protested the businessman. "Well, sir, I don't usually mention this, but there is the 'voodoo dick,'" the old man said. "So what's up with this voodoo dick?" the businessman asked. The old man reached under the counter, and pulled out an old wooden box carved with strange symbols. He opened it, and there lay a very ordinary-looking dildo. The businessman laughed, and said, "Big fucking deal. It looks like every other dildo in this shop!" The old man said, "But you haven't seen what it'll do yet." He pointed to a door and said "Voodoo dick, the door." The voodoo dick rose out of its box, darted over to the door, and started screwing the keyhole. The whole door shook with the vibrations, and a crack developed down the middle. Before the door could split, the old man said, "Voodoo dick, get back in your box!" The voodoo dick stopped, floated back to the box and lay there, quiescent once more. The businessman said, "I'll take it!" The old man resisted and said it wasn't for sale, but he finally surrendered to $700 in cash. The guy took it home to his wife, told her it was a special dildo and that to use it, all she had to do was say, "Voodoo dick, my pussy." He left for his trip satisfied things would be fine while he was gone. After he'd been gone a few days, the wife was unbearably horny. She thought of several people who would willingly satisfy her, but then she remembered the voodoo dick. She got it out, and said "Voodoo dick, my pussy!" The voodoo dick shot to her crotch and started pumping. It was great, like nothing she'd ever experienced before. After three orgasms, she decided she'd had enough, and tried to pull it out, but it was stuck in her, still thrusting. She tried and tried to get it out, but nothing worked. Her husband had forgot to tell her how to shut it off. So she decided to go to the hospital to see if they could help. She put her clothes on, got in the car and started to drive to the hospital, quivering with every thrust of the dildo. On the way, another orgasm nearly made her swerve off the road, and she was pulled over by a policeman. He asked for her license, and then asked how much she'd had to drink. Gasping and twitching, she explained that she hadn't been drinking, but that a voodoo dick was stuck in her pussy, and wouldn't stop screwing. The officer looked at her for a second, and then said, "Yea, right. Voodoo dick, my ass!"
     
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  16. DrRainbow

    DrRainbow Ambassador of Love

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    [​IMG]
     
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  17. DrRainbow

    DrRainbow Ambassador of Love

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    [​IMG]
     
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  18. DrRainbow

    DrRainbow Ambassador of Love

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    [​IMG]
     
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  19. DrRainbow

    DrRainbow Ambassador of Love

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    [​IMG]
     
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  20. Candy Gal

    Candy Gal Lifetime Supporter

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    Lol what happened?
     
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