I really liked that part. It was really interesting reading this. I think anyone that's been on a relationship can relate so well to it, though this had a very interesting twist. I find it more interesting because the falling of teeth in dreams is supposed to mean death, so to me it suits perfectly for the death of a relationship.
I wish I had something positive to say on this one... it didn't work for me... I'm trying to pinpoint why but I'm not sure. Perhaps the idea of a perfect smile... is there such a thing? There is not perfection in love or in a smile... but love does make us look past the crooked teeth... doesn't it? Something about your action words lost me: I became, I payed, I tried, I watched... why not just describe the mouth and it's beauty and imperfections... love is like that beautiful and imperfect... and painful. Glad you are writing again.... sorry it's because things are not tip top shape for you. I was inspired by your last pm... perhaps I'll look now for that one draft poem and post... Found it and will post, it's called "When I was Drowning I was a Good Poet" I think you will like it... Vetty
