Privacy...uh...issues

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Insomniac,

You have a serious problem here with regards to your parents. No parent has the right to interfere with your sex life like that - especially now you're legally an adult!

If I were in your situation I would talk to them about this and not rest until they had conceded to mind their own business and let you live your own life.

There is a probelm here because they obviously don't think that you having sex is a good thing, whereas you do. Either they need to accept that you have a different opinion to them, or you need to understand that they are right. But no good will come of sneaking around behind their backs, you will only be driving a wedge between you and them and that's not a good idea.

You need to have a good discussion with your parents and explain that you are old enough to decide for yourself whether to have a sex life or not. Ask them how old do you have to be before they let you decide for yourself? Ask them what is the ideal age to start having sex? Ask them how they would feel if their parents told them not to have sex any more?

Personally, I find it ridiculous that a man of 18 would have to PRETEND that he didn't have a sex life. Where I come from, virtually everyone has had sex by 17 and if you haven't your parents think you're gay. In some cultures, everyone is married before they're 15!

But it's not for me, or anyone, to say whose values are right and whose are wrong. Each person must decide for themselves. The only exception is that young children (say 12 or under) aren't old enough to make those decisions, and there usually just isn't enough responsibility there at that age to take the necessary precautions. But that's my personal view and I can't force that onto other people, nor would I want to.

A good parent can only guide and advise. Domination and command are severely detremental to the relationship. Nobody can feel happy when their parents control them!

 

I completely and utterly agree with you in everyway but I don't understand how either one of us can sit with our parents are tell them we are sexual active, which isn't the case, we've only gone as far as oral, I don't think either one of us are ready for the next step. That alone is hard enough, that being that our parents are home 24/7, and I realize I am an 18 year old adult but I don't work and I'm not paying for the truck, so it's hard sometimes.

 

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I'm not saying that I can't have sex, I'm saying that I'm still under the "live under our house, our rules" scheme.