really worth it?

Pot, mostly. I do shrooms a couple of times a year when I find myself in the right state of mind. I am guilty of overdoing the drinking on occasion, which is just as bad as any hard drug, i'll admit that. But thats something ive been trying to stay away from lately. I'm not trying to come off as judgemental, I just don't quite understand the curiosity. it really doesn't seem like its worth the risk to me.

 

I would agree with not understanding the curiosity. I enjoy the opiate high to an extent. But like I said mainlining a drug is going an extra step in so many ways to achieve being doped. I was curious to try it just blowing it, and it certainly is a powerful opiate, but if it isn't equally potent as oxymorphone, oxymorphone is more potent.

 

I think you just answered your own question that's been burning inside your head while condemning heroin in all these threads... "the right state of mind"... you're in it so enjoy your life... and Ive lost WAY more people to alcohol than any illicit drug EVER... from DWI accidents alone... Im not H curious in any manner, if I was, I wouldve procured some by now, I never had an inate yearning to try it ever, but like I said within the throws of withdrawal, I wouldnt put anything past myself...its not like I would look for it, but if someone was like "I dont have any OXY's, here try this though" and lined me up, I just might do it, if I was withdrawing that bad, and there was no hope... again it all goes back to the frame of mind... its not that the opiate "high" is so good, its that being sick is that fucking bad...

 

maybe thats my problem also planthead... I HATE needles bad... I might sniff it, but so many people also say that they swore they would never bang it, but then sniffed for a week and were mainling like Slash and shit... I just cant see myself working up a needle that shit grosses me the fuck out... but I have a HUGE pill problem and its NO better in ANY way than heroin so...

 

I really hope some I'll stop speed and live a normal life. I know the non addicted people out there reading this is probably thinking "Then stop already" but what you don't realize is, thats not an easy thing to do at all. Expecially if you're going to school like me. It's pretty much impossible to focus without the speed, and thats just because I need it just to focus anymore. I mean i don't know if you've been addicted to anything before but if you have then you better not be thinking "Then stop already" cuz if you were ever truly a prisoner of anything then you'd know its not that easy to just escape and be free. How exactly can a true addict seek help? There is no one I can really talk to that'd understand, and all my current friends trying to get me off, all they're doing to help me is telling me "If you do that shit I'm gonna kick your ass." and litterly, thats what every one of my friend tell me to help me. No body I know knows how it feels, a lot pretend like they do, but they don't, and I know they don't. You have to know how it feels to truly understand ones pain. I've lived a very different life than most of my friends too, and thats how a lot of addicts start, they live a different kind of life. I mean my life wasn't exactly a bad life. Whats weird is my dad used to be a bad addict with speed for several years, then one day which I still remember he when thru a psychosis, blacked out, and beat my mom from speed, the same shit I'm doing. My dad swears up and down he doesn't remember doing it and he hasn't touched speed since. This was like 10 years ago.I didn't decide to do drugs untill my parents split up about 3 or 4 years ago, I mean I've tried pot before that, but once that happened, I just didn't give a shit. Now I'm looking back saying this wasn't the answer and all I did was use too many drugs to ignore what was going on around me and turned into a speed head. Trust me, if you saw me walking down the street you'd say "That kid is totally a speed head".
Drugs have changed my whole view point on life too. I used to be a catholic, not that I'd still want to be now anyhow, but now I just believe life is fake, pointless, and meaningless. Boy I'd love it if there was God trust me, I'm not trying to get offensive with anyone who is a christian, and if anyone reading this is a christian then I highly respect it, but I'm just explaining what the path of drugs took me down to believe. You start stealing like orlando said. I've stolen my dads checks and pennies and I got caught for both a different times eventually. Now that all this shit has happened and its on my chest, when I think about quitting, I think whats the point now, I already got all this shit on chest and there is no going back to what I did to hurt others. I hope someone takes a lesson from us, because if you choose to do pills or hard drugs, then you better expect the possibility of this happening to you or even worst, not even living to get this far. Like I said, I might sound like I'm going a bit ahead of myself seeing how I'm only a senior in highschool and I'm 18 years old, I know I still my whole life ahead of me, but now that I got myself in this hole, life is shitty without the drug, litterly shitty. I feel as if I quit that shitty feeling will be casted onto me forever. Drugs change people, it's a fact.

 

shooting up with a needle is sick, but who knows, maybe one day when I'm 30 I'll be sick, seriously, who the hell knows.

 

Im sick ...

 

It's okay man, all of us who are addicted are sick really. Pretty much to answer this threads question tho, heroin is not worth the risk, and neither is speed, oxys, or anything else that people have ruined their lives doing. I wouldn't exactly say I've totally ruined my life yet, but I've definatly ruined my teenage life.

 

hey man, you're killing me Tyler, dude I had to go to a suboxone clinic to even begin trying to live a normal life, but lets be real here, Im just gonna be a sub-head after all the oxy is outta my life and it'll be another, different pill that some fuckin enormous pharmaceutical company is gonna get rich offa MY dependancy... its a vicious circle and you're right quitting is the HARDEST thing to do... but Tyler there IS someone you can go to that can help you, you have to just realize you're NOT the only kid in america with a speed habit brother... you may be the only kid on your block, but three blocks away there's another kid, whose family is suffering also man... and I know theres no miracle drug for speed addicts like suboxone for opiate addicts but bro there IS a better way, trust me, cuz this fuckin way sucks man...

 

I don't inject opiates tho..

 

Really it just comes down to needles. I wouldn't want to poke myself, and my friends have had fucked up arms from being dumbasses. Trust me I like to get a rush, I would love to experience that immediate rush, but then not love enough to do it. I do enjoy vaporizing for the quicker high and rush.

 

yah I've seen some k heads with some pretty gnarly track marks, I normally do intramuscular injection, much easier .

 

and Drugs do change us to a certain extent we allow them too. The mind is fluid however and if you would want to change something you could depending on your own will power. Test yourself by trying to take breaks. For one who the fuck wants to be extremely tolerant? Why waste more money than you wanted to in the first place? I would know I have a problem when I can not bring myself to always budget out money for weed before opiates. Also sometimes opiates leave me feeling so shitty the next day, Like I'm never waking up, that I want to take a break.

 

tyler, there are options. I dont know your situation but there are always options. Stopping an addictive drug cold turkey is damn near impossible, not to mention really unsafe in a lot of cases, but there are treatment options. You just need to find someone to help you. If you cant turn to your parents (i dont know your situation, but if your dad was a speed addict he'll understand better than anyone) then there are other options out there, especially for a young kid like yourself. I'm not trying to be like other people that tell you "just quit" because I do understand addiction and I know its not easy. But you dont have to be in such a hopeless situation for the rest of your life. Talk to a doctor or someone; quitting any addiction starts with one small step. i know I sound super cheesy and after school special right now, but your posts are breaking my heart. You're too young to sound so hopeless.

 

I didn't mean to get all emo and shit, I was just expressing how my life as speed addict is. I mean I could always try concerta as an alternative. I'm just a young man without a goal. What is sad is, there is really no way to tell someone straight, cuz if someone is curious, they're more than likely gonna try it anyways, and if they like it, theres such a big possibility they're gonna wanna try it again. That how most of us started right? I know some people who are really smart with drugs. One of my friends loved speed as much as me, and we both started together using it everyday, then he started to realize what happening, he even tried to warn me, and now he rarely speeds. Tomorrow I'm gettin 3 concertas and 2 vyvanse, and I am looking very forward to it, but I'm not looking forward to getting high from it, I mean sure that'd be great and I will get a little jolt, and I havent done concerta in forever so I have no tolerance, but tomorrow will be day 3 with no sleep, I'm actually gonna go try to take a 3 hour nap in a minute, cuz in 3 hours I get up for school. And these pills really are saving my life tomorrow, but that sad part is, you guys heard me talking all this time about speed, and what I just said about it saving my life was obviously not me talking, it was the speed.

 

Take a heavy dose of mescaline cactus that will make speed look like a little bitch, and I've used crystal before to, as well as plenty of adderall and smoked vyvanse .

Mescaline cactus is amazing medicine.

 

Tyler I know how small of a town Jeromesville is, Ive seen MANY of those smaller cities in OHIO where its just dead end blocks and no hope, but there IS someone that can help, but just like me you dont seem ready to get help right now anyways... if someone was gonna come up to you tomorrow, take your hand and show you the way without being judgemental, would you go? its something I wrestle with every fuckin nite before sleeping my brother... and it sucks cuz you're right its like a prison of pills, nigga...

 

I just don't want to see anyone else in my life head down the same route as me or anyone else going through a similar problem on here. This is definatly a bad position to be in, and I let it happen. I understand my dad would be a good person to talk to but, thinking about talking to him, that is when the speed will start talking again, and then I'll decide hmmm, you know, how about one last time. I've said that at least 1000 times before. I really do wish if I quit I could prove it, if I went to rehab, do you know what? I'm that kid at my school who was so bad on speed he had to leave school to goto rehab. I mean everyone knows I do drugs, they might not know what drugs exactly, I'm sure they could guess, I only weight 115 pounds and the days today for example when I've been speeding my balls off with no sleep, my eyes get extremely dilated, teachers notice, students notice, also my behavior is different. I'm twidling my thumbs, chewing gum, rocking my feet, I just overall looked tweaked. I'm not gonna lie, I do enjoy the special occasion (usially when i dont speed) going into school on other drugs, because it gets me away from speed. I really want to goto school on cough syrup again, it was so crazy the first time, and I do really enjoy adventures like that because at the end of the school day your just woaaaaahhhhh.... I know I'm more responsible with pain killers and stuff like cough syrup, because I do cough syrup maybe once every 3 months, because thats just how I like it. I went on a 4 day cough syrup binge before, and its not fun. Painkillers often make me sick, I usially vomit when I first start using them. Also I like the way they kill pain, but the only painkillers thats actually killed my pain to a level of just pleasure was morphine when it was shot into me at the doctors (Ive snorted it too multiple time and it was definatly nothing like having it shot) and methadone. Of course, these two drugs make me sick and when i do this kind of shit in school I really watch how many I'm doing.

 

dude your 18 I've already been there which is why I'm recommending the mescaline cactus cut out the woes is me bullshit, youre still a teenager.

 

thats weird I just talked about that in my last post before I saw yours. Am I ready? Yeah I'm ready, but if someone took my hand, would I go? Hmmmm, honestly I don't know. I wish this was a situation where I could just grow a pair and handle it, but the speed is grabbin my by the balls. I need to become a stoner again, i barely even smoke pot anymore, and the reason is, pot just isn't like a pill. I do think pots effects are way more noticable then alot of pills, but it just doesn't really cure anything except bordem (not in school as much but I do love blazing before school).